Several Bolingbrook residents claimed they encountered the unnamable ghost terrorizing the United States by attacking anyone critical of it.

The residents, who asked that their last names not be published, described a ghost with flames in its eye sockets and a forked tongue. All of them reported the ghost demanded to be called a champion of free speech. When they refused, the ghost said they would suffer his wrath. 

Steve, a longtime Bolingbrook resident, claims the ghost frightened his employer into firing him. “All I did was write a post that (name redacted) organized efforts to blacklist college professors. It said it was a champion of free speech and demanded that I prove it wrong. I said its threats proved him wrong. It replied that it was going to visit my boss. Now I’m unemployed. More free time to protest Trump, I guess.”

Becky, a new Bolingbrook resident, claims the ghost banned her X account. “All I did was quote something (Name redacted) said that I thought was racist. Then it appeared, and said most blacks were inferior, except for its black friend. When it asked me to prove it wrong, I mentioned Dr. Charles Richard Drew, the man who pioneered blood banking. It disappeared, and X suspended my account. I’ll miss Grok.”

According to sources in Bolingbrook’s Department of Paranormal Affairs, the ghost has targeted over 20,000 people globally. The sources fear the ghost becoming more powerful every night. 

One source urges residents to consider two options if they encounter the ghost. “You could praise it. Like saying it did politics right when it was alive. Or you could stand your ground and tell it off. But I’d only recommend that if you’re a millionaire.”

Also in the Babbler:

ICE agents stopped from raiding Clow UFO Base
Space Force paratroopers conducting “Urban War Games” near Naperville
Weredeer pack joins ICE
God to smite Bolingbrook on 9/25/25

Note: This is a work of fiction. All opinions expressed are my own. They do not reflect the views of any organization I work for or of my employer. 

My upcoming Urban Fantasy novel, Revenge of the Phantom Press, is available for preorder. If you like Urban Fantasy, like the Dresden Files and Welcome to Night Vale, you’ll like Revenge. It’s part of the Bolingbrook Babbler Stories books, which are available through all retailers.