For My Mum: You Will Always Have A Home In My Heart

I lost my wonderful, loving and amazing mother to the cold hand of death on the evening of 16 November, 2017. When I got that phone call that my mother had suffered a heart failure while at work, had been rushed to a hospital in London, and I was told to prepare for the worst while I made the journey from Chelmsford to London to be with her, that minute I knew life would never be the same again. It was a sudden death; I never got to say goodbye.

Seeing my beautiful mother lifeless on the hospital bed cuts like a sword through my heart. However, I took solace in the fact that she looked so peaceful. As I held her still warm hands and kissed her goodbye, I uttered the words I wish I had said to her as many times as possible when she was alive…Mummy, I Love You.

Words can’t express the pain I felt and still feel.

My Mum was a super woman, WonderWoman, hard-working to a fault, fiercely independent and super generous.

I remember filming this video in my mum’s home in London during one of these spells where I had been rendered homeless once again in London. My mum had opened up her home to me to crash while I sort out my house and job situation. By so doing, she saved me from even considering the conditional offers from predators who I thought were my friends or comrades but who instead saw a vulnerable woman in need and decided it was a good time for them to confess their affection for me while offering me their sofa, bed or a spare room in exchange for sex or relationship with them (and to think some of them wonder why i never want to speak with them again).

I always had the luxury of having the choice not to take up these predators on their offer of a sofa, bed, room, relationship even marriage proposal in exchange for a roof over my head because I had a mum who was there for me. Their appalling requests and conditional offer of help showed me their true colour and the part of human nature you don’t get to see if you are never put in a vulnerable position.

It is one of my favourite videos even though it was filmed at one of the most difficult times in my life. My Mum made these times bearable for me and always told me everything will be alright again.

My mother was a very caring mum who despite her meagre means was always ready to put everything on hold to make me feel comfortable and provide a roof over my head in difficult periods, shared her bed with me when i had none, and always looked out for me even though we disagreed on almost everything, especially Religion. Even though I was a moody daughter who never seemed to open up to her like her other daughters, she was still there for me.

From my mum, I learnt early never to depend on a man or anyone, for my wants or needs. She was a fiercely independent woman who singlehandedly provided for her children and grandchildren without ever asking much back in return.

It’s almost four months since you were untimely and unfortunately taken away from your children by the sudden cold hand of death. I miss you everyday my precious mum. and I wish i had been more affectionate towards you, let you know in ways that left no doubt in your mind that I love and appreciate you.

On this Mother’s Day, I celebrate you dear mother, and all the good and bad times we had together. You are at peace now Mum as you no longer need to toil in this cruel world. However, the love you showered on your children and grandchildren and your generosity of heart continue to live on in the hearts of these who knew you. I am glad to have been your daughter and I will always love you.

Thank you mummy for your unconditional love. Your children appreciate all you did for us, SuperMum.

R.I.P my precious mother, you will always have a home in my heart.

 

 

White Privilege: The existence of poor white people doesn’t erase Racism

Around 2:00am this morning, I was woken up by a WhatsApp message from an ex. What did he want in the middle of the night? Well, it turned out he has just seen a homeless white couple and he wanted me to know racism is a figment of my imagination.

Just saw this drug couple sitting in the street in front the train station with a two years old daughter. It really breaks my heart. Not all children are born equal

Alert – Assumption that all homeless people are drug addicts.

His conclusion –

In Ipswich, skin colour is the least problem

I was like, “White Satan, get thee away from me this ungodly hour!”

I refused to be dragged into that discussion again, especially at such hour. However, the message kept nagging at me, I really wanted to ignore it but thought i should not. So, first thing in the morning, I sent him a few lengthy responses about what the reaction would have been if it was a homeless black couple with their two-year-old daughter sitting outside a train station, and in Ipswich of all places. The reaction would more have been around the line of-

  • “WTF is a black person doing in our white neighbourhood”
  • “Those immigrants are filthy and have bought their poverty to our dear Ipswich”
  • “Go home niggers, we don’t need your type here.”

Unfortunately, I’ve had this type of discussion with him so many times. He thinks because he was a cash strapped German who came to UK about twenty years ago, and had to do some menial jobs to survive, black people cannot blame anything, including their economic circumstances, on racism. In fact, to him it is not racism, it is a class struggle issue. Unfortunately, he is one of those white people who think that racism is a thing of the past and that Classicism is the problem.

I cannot reiterate enough that White people who claim not to see colour while benefiting from systemic racism are part of the problem.

While on a date with a nice, white gentleman who identify as a progressive, I told him his white skin was like winning a lottery. He immediately thought I wanted to be white and that I had internalised self-hate for my black skin! I tried to explain how being a white person can be a lottery you did not even sign up to play, but I doubt he got the point. Also, he wanted me to put a label on his sexual orientation because as a cis, upper middle class white man, he dated a very feminine Asian trans woman. I point blank told him i don’t put label on anyone’s sexual orientation or gender identity. However, I think if as a cis man you date a trans woman, this would not in any way affect your sexual orientation or gender identity. You dated a woman, that is all there is to it. No, it doesn’t make you queer or means you can now identify as LGBTQ, not if you truly believe you dated a woman, anyway.

Well, back to the issue of my ex and his erasure and denial of racism because of the existence of poor white people. My attempts to make him consider that he probably reacted that way because they were homeless white people and not homeless black people only made him angrier than see sense. He responded that it was about the girl, not my egoism. Yeah, my lived experience of racism as an immigrant black woman in a western country is all about my ego. Racism is a figment of my egoist imagination.

I was like okay, if you can’t take my black ass word for it as i am an egoist black woman, maybe you will consider the word of a white person. Then I googled some articles on white privilege and immediately the beloved article, ‘Explaining White Privilege To A Broke White Personby Gina Crosley-Corcoran came up. I thought yeah, I’d share that, but then I thought. “Shit, a white woman wrote it”. I know a white man would stand a better chance of getting to my ex than a white woman, but well, I sent him the article anyway. Unfortunately, all he saw was that it was a Huffington post article, and before he even read it, he responded that Huffington post is conformist propaganda. I told him he probably was confusing it with Daily mail or Fox news.

Anyway, I wanted to share this enlightening article by Gina Crosley-Corcoran with you. The article was her reaction to the acclaimed academic piece by Peggy McIntosh titled- ‘White privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack’.

Excerpts from Explaining White Privilege To A Broke White Person by Gina Crosley-Corcoran

I, maybe more than most people, can completely understand why broke white folks get pissed when the word “privilege” is thrown around. As a child I was constantly discriminated against because of my poverty, and those wounds still run very deep. But luckily my college education introduced me to a more nuanced concept of privilege: the term “intersectionality.” The concept of intersectionality recognizes that people can be privileged in some ways and definitely not privileged in others. There are many different types of privilege, not just skin-color privilege, that impact the way people can move through the world or are discriminated against. These are all things you are born into, not things you earned, that afford you opportunities that others may not have. For example:

Citizenship: Simply being born in this country affords you certain privileges that non-citizens will never access.

Class: Being born into a financially stable family can help guarantee your health, happiness, safety, education, intelligence, and future opportunities.

Sexual orientation: If you were born straight, every state in this country affords you privileges that non-straight folks have to fight the Supreme Court for.

Sex: If you were born male, you can assume that you can walk through a parking garage without worrying that you’ll be raped and then have to deal with a defense attorney blaming it on what you were wearing.

Ability: If you were born able-bodied, you probably don’t have to plan your life around handicap access, braille, or other special needs.

Gender identity: If you were born cisgender (that is, your gender identity matches the sex you were assigned at birth), you don’t have to worry that using the restroom or locker room will invoke public outrage.

As you can see, belonging to one or more category of privilege, especially being a straight, white, middle-class, able-bodied male, can be like winning a lottery you didn’t even know you were playing. But this is not to imply that any form of privilege is exactly the same as another, or that people lacking in one area of privilege understand what it’s like to be lacking in other areas. Race discrimination is not equal to sex discrimination and so forth.

And listen: Recognizing privilege doesn’t mean suffering guilt or shame for your lot in life. Nobody’s saying that straight, white, middle-class, able-bodied males are all a bunch of assholes who don’t work hard for what they have. Recognizing privilege simply means being aware that some people have to work much harder just to experience the things you take for granted (if they ever can experience them at all).

I know now that I am privileged in many ways. I am privileged as a natural-born white citizen. I am privileged as a cisgender woman. I am privileged as an able-bodied person. I am privileged that my first language is also our national language, and that I was born with an intellect and ambition that pulled me out of the poverty that I was otherwise destined for. I was privileged to be able to marry my way “up” by partnering with a privileged, middle-class, educated male who fully expected me to earn a college degree.

There are a million ways I experience privilege, and some that I certainly don’t. But thankfully, intersectionality allows us to examine these varying dimensions and degrees of discrimination while raising awareness of the results of multiple systems of oppression at work.

Excerpts from –White privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack by Peggy McIntosh –

Thinking through unacknowledged male privilege as a phenomenon, I realized that, since
hierarchies in our society are interlocking, there are most likely a phenomenon of while privilege
that was similarly denied and protected. As a white person, I realized I had been taught about
racism as something that puts others at a disadvantage, but had been taught not to see on of its
corollary aspects, white privilege, which puts me at an advantage.
I think whites are carefully taught not to recognize white privilege, as males are taught not to
recognize male privilege. So I have begun in an untutored way to ask what it is like to have white
privilege. I have come to see white privilege as an invisible package of unearned assets that I can
count on cashing in each day, but about which I was “meant” to remain oblivious. White
privilege is like an invisible weightless knapsack of special provisions, maps, passports,
codebooks, visas, clothes, tools , and blank checks.
Describing white privilege makes one newly accountable.

She further wrote-

I usually think of privilege as being a favored state, whether earned or conferred by birth or luck.
Yet some of the conditions I have described here work to systematically overempower certain
groups. Such privilege simply confers dominance because of one’s race or sex.
1. I can if I wish arrange to be in the company of people of my race most of the time.
2. If I should need to move, I can be pretty sure renting or purchasing housing in an area
which I can afford and in which I would want to live.
3. I can be pretty sure that my neighbors in such a location will be neutral or pleasant to me.
4. I can go shopping alone most of the time, pretty well assured that I will not be followed
or harassed.
5. I can turn on the television or open to the front page of the paper and see people of my
race widely represented.
6. When I am told about our national heritage or about “civilization,” I am shown that
people of my color made it what it is.
7. I can be sure that my children will be given curricular materials that testify to the
existence of their race.
8. If I want to, I can be pretty sure of finding a publisher for this piece on white privilege.
9. I can go into a music shop and count on finding the music of my race represented, into a
supermarket and find the staple foods which fit with my cultural traditions, into a
hairdresser’s shop and find someone who can cut my hair.
10. Whether I use checks, credit cards, or cash, I can count on my skin color not to work
against the appearance of financial reliability.
11. I can arrange to protect my children most of the time from people who might not like
them.
12. I can swear, or dress in second hand clothes, or not answer letters, without having people
attribute these choices to the bad morals,the poverty, or the illiteracy of my race.
13. I can speak in public to a powerful male group without putting my race on trial.
14. I can do well in a challenging situation without being called a credit to my race.
15. I am never asked to speak for all the people of my racial group.
16. I can remain oblivious of the language and customs of persons of color who constitute the
world’s majority without feeling in my culture any penalty for such oblivion.
17. I can criticize our government and talk about how much I fear its policies and behavior
without being seen as a cultural outsider.
18. I can be pretty sure that if I ask to talk to “the person in charge,” I will be facing a person
of my race.
19. If a traffic cop pulls me over or if the IRS audits my tax return, I can be sure I haven’t
been singled out because of my race.
20. I can easily buy posters, postcards, picture books, greeting cards, dolls, toys, and
children’s magazines featuring people of my race.
21. I can go home from most meetings of organizations I belong to feeling somewhat tied in,
rather than isolated, out-of-place, out numbered, unheard, held at a distance, or feared.
22. I can take a job with an affirmative action employer without having coworkers on the job
suspect that I got it because of race.
23. I can choose public accommodation without fearing that people of my race cannot get in
or will be mistreated in the places I have chosen.
24. I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help, my race will not work against me.
25. If my day, week, or year is going badly, I need not ask of each negative episode or
situation whether it has racial overtones.
26. I can choose blemish cover or bandages in flesh color and have them more or less match
my skin.

I would encourage reading the two articles in full if you have not, and if you have, it is refreshing to read them again.

Also, don’t be like my Ex.

 

Happy Birthday To This Wonder Woman

 

I am very grateful to be hale and hearty on this occasion of my 42nd Birthday. The past has been glorious with some pains along the way. I am learning to embrace my present with gratitude and optimism, and I can say I am all geared up to make the future the best of them all.

I appreciate that life is full of surprises, some good, some not so good, and we cannot plan for all exigencies. I embrace life surprises with an open mind and a sense of adventure. I am just grateful to be alive to feel and experience all that life throws my way (and it has been throwing some lemons my way for some time now, there is only so much lemonade one can make with life’s lemons before screaming enough with the cliche).

This year, my birthday resolution is to leave in the past everything that does not grow me. Life is too precious to waste on those who do not deserve to be in my life. I am choosing to surround myself with people who look more like my future than my past.

It is time for me to learn the art of letting go, both in my professional and personal life. There is no point wishing to relive the past when there are still so many adventures to be had, memories to be made, places to explore, and many more ways to live and survive beyond the conventional or familiar.

I must learn to say out loud without shame that I am tired, fed up and done with a system and people that take so much from me and give so little back. It is OK to move away from it all without guilt or a sense of failure.

It is time for me to embrace the unfamiliar and let go of the familiar, its comforts and promises which no longer fulfil or nourish me.

Happy Birthday to me as I step up once again to be the Wonder Woman that I know I am.

Below are some pictures I took on my special day, and a video of my annual Birthday dance. Enjoy! 

Life isn’t always black and white, but on those occasions that it is, everything becomes much clearer and simply beautiful.

Just chilling;after all it’s my 42nd year on planet earth today. Happy with my past, contented with my present and embracing my future with gratitude. Don’t forget baby, leave everything that does not grow you in the past.

Below is a video of my annual birthday dance, which has become a sort of ritual now. Every birthday, I dance to a song of my choice and share with friends. This year, I chose to dance to another old school favourite of mine- ‘Baby boy’ by Beyonce featuring Sean Paul. Enjoy the video.

Brilliant BeatBoxer Beatboxing at London Pride, 2017!

This beatboxer got my hitherto dead ovaries coming alive and jumping for joy when I stumbled on his street performance at London Pride, 2017. He sure set the crowd on fire and he was a sheer pleasure to watch. Guy got moves, I sure loved his swag and accent.

After a bit of stalki… oops, sorry, digging for info, I finally learned he goes by the stage name MPFree.

Needless to say, I am now a fan of beatboxing. I’ve even started practising some beats at home. I should find out where he regularly gigs as it would be nice to take a few more notes from the expert. #LoveHappensHere.

Enjoy the video.

Sights and Sounds of London Pride 2017

Cheesy singing, dirty dancing and that moment revellers jumped into the Trafalgar square fountain; it is fair to say I had massive fun at London Pride, 2017.

Held on 8 July, 2017 with the catchy theme, ‘Love Happens Here‘, London Pride 2017 was more fun than political for me. I decided to fly solo rather than march in the parade. I cheered on those who were walking in the parade and later joined the party at the big stage in Trafalgar square where various talented artists performed and entertained the appreciative audience. As the young ones would say, it was lit!

Enjoy the videos!

Enjoy the beautiful, diverse, fun sights and sounds of London Pride, 2017, devoid of my horrible singing. #LoveHappensHere

Serena Williams Nude Pregnancy Pictures and the Predictable Reactions.

Serena Williams pregnancy picture on the cover of Vanity Fair is the embodiment of beauty, strength and womanhood. The pics are breathtaking, the story of her courtship with her fiance was well written and quite moving. She is indeed WonderWoman.

I have always loved pregnancy pictures. I find them fascinating. Growing up in Nigeria, I was fascinated with wooden sculptures of pregnant women. They looked so earthy, majestic and divine. I wish I took some pregnancy pictures when I was pregnant with my son, 22 years ago. If mobile phones were a thing then, I sure would have taken pregnancy selfies.

I don’t have any plan to carry another pregnancy or nurse a screaming tot, however if I ever find myself pregnant again, I would document every single day of that pregnancy with a selfie. And yeah, I’d be sharing them on social media. People who are disgusted by naked pregnant women pictures will just have to scroll past my contents or choke on their own hate.

I stumbled on this comment left by my very good friend and fellow Nigerian on Serena’s post, and I must say, I totally understand how she feels.

Some people read the beautiful love story, saw the pregnancy pictures, and all they took away from the story was to feel offended by her beautiful pregnancy pics. When I read that some people used the word “disgusting” to describe Serena Williams’ nude pregnancy pics, I knew instinctively that some of them would be my country people, Nigerians, and yeah, I was right! Hear them-

What is disgusting about a woman’s nude body? This is a country where a woman wearing a bikini to its many beaches is still frowned upon. The people just aren’t comfortable with a woman showing as much skin as possible in a public space. Never mind that it is one of the most corrupt countries, a haven for rapists, and one of the highest consumer of porn, especially gay porn, funny as the legislators recently voted 14 years imprisonment against same sex relationships, and ten years jail term for anyone who advocates for LGBT rights. Hypocrites.

Haters are everywhere on the globe, here are some of them hating on Serena’s pregnancy pics-

The human’s body is a beautiful thing, especially a woman’s body. It is even more so when it is nurturing a human being inside it. I don’t get how that is not fascinating. Yes, some think it should be for the private eyes of the closest families and friends, but it is still the woman’s prerogative to share this wonder with the world if they so wish. You are not being forced to fix your disapproving gaze on these majestic pictures, you don’t have to comment on it to register your disgust, or displeasure at a woman sharing her pregnancy pics.

We get it that you are offended by another woman’s body, but really, it is her body, her choice and good for her if she made lots of money too by sharing those majestic pics. I know I would share mine just for the sheer pleasure of it, but if someone offered me good old cash to do it, I’d say let’s do it!

I am glad that so many people also left positive comments, applauded and thanked Serena Williams for sharing these amazing pregnancy pictures with us. Hear them-

Pregnancy selfies are great, if they are your cup of tea, please go for it with all gusto, don’t let these easily offended by the sight of a woman’s natural body discourage you. If it is not your cup of tea, good, enjoy your pregnancy, however do not go around dissing those who share their pregnancy selfies.

Serena Williams looked majestic in those pics taken by famous photographer, Annie Leibovitz. I am really glad she chose to share such beautiful, intimate pics of her pregnant self with her legion of fans. Here is wishing her safe delivery when the time comes for her baby to make a grand entrance into the world.

 

 

 

The Terror attack on Muslims in London and the appalling Muslimphobes

On June 19, 2017, I woke up to the news that there had been a terror attack at Finsbury park Mosque, targeted against Muslims in London. I was shocked and appalled by the barbaric act. I posted on my Facebook wall to condemn the terrorist act. A valued facebook friend from Australia responded with such surprising views that I was really taken aback.

As I have been meaning to write about the Darren Osborne terror attack on Muslims but have not been able to, I thought I should share the exchanges I had with my Australian friend here as the comments basically covered what my thoughts are on the terror act.

I posted on my wall-

Oh no, a counter terror attack in London! This is a dangerous ground to tread, London is too diverse for this appalling act. Londoners are proud of our diversity and tolerance, this is barbaric. I’m just tired of all the bad news. Humans seems to be going downhill.

My Australian FB friend commented-

People can only be murdered for so long before someone stands up and fights back. The English have a history of putting up with shit for so long before taking action. Thankfully someone has chosen to do so.

Needless to say I was appalled by his line of thinking –

That is a very appalling, horrible thing to say. Going around murdering innocent people because you do not like their religion or because a few religious extremists carried out terrorist attacks in the name of that religion is barbaric and very inhumane. There is nothing that can justify murdering innocent people. I have no respect for Islam neither do I have any respect for Christianity nor any other silly religion out there, but I will never advocate for the killing of religious people. Human rights guarantee the right to freedom of Religion. I am appalled by your hateful comment here and I will say NEVER leave such a comment glorifying and justifying the killings of innocent people on my wall.

He refused to put his thinking cap on and responded with –

If these Muslims were not attacking every corner of the globe, every day of the week there would be no reprisals, no trillions spent on security, you would not know they were part of any community. They would be under the radar such as Hindu, Buddhist etc but they are not. They created this situation so they need to suck it up and accept the responsibility for their dogma which has turned the world into chaos.

When some of my British friends tried to set him straight, he was not having it –

Perhaps if you pom’s were as aggressive at actually controlling your social failure with Islam as you are with someone who is please to see someone in your cuntry have the spine to actually stand up and fight instead of hiding behind a keyboard you might not be in decay. After reading all the rubbish you have thrown at me ‘good ridden’s’ to you all.

 

 

 

 

His fellow Australian who has known him personally for about 10 years also stepped in to talk some sense into him-

hate speech like yours is the very reason why people drive their car through innocent people who are simply participating in the deity of their religious beliefs!

You’re stereotyping all Muslims as being murderous terrorists which is bullshit!!

Wake up man!!! What you’re doing is no fucking better than what the terrorist does! An act of terrorism is to incite fear, hate and to terrorise.

I actually know a lot of Muslims and they are wonderful caring beautiful people.

They’re not saying things like your saying. !!!!!

I also thought I should talk more sense into him –

How on earth does attacking and committing terror acts against Muslims solve terrorism? That line of thought is indeed very barbaric, primitive, ignorant and retrogressive.

Were the Muslims killed by this far right English man terrorist the Islamists extremists who are committing terrorists Act?

How is the action of this silly, primitive, barbaric Western terrorist any different from the actions of the Islamist terrorists you loathe?

How is your glorification and justification of this heinous act any different from the jubilation of ISIS and Islamist terrorists after a terror attack?

How is the killing of innocent people targeted solely for their religion any different from killing westerners in the name of Islam?

Today this man targeted Muslims, tomorrow it will be some westerners with extreme far right ideology that will start targeting migrants. And who next, black people living in Europe?

Look, let’s get this straight, there is no justification for hate crimes or any kind of terrorism

Innocent Muslims do not need to convince you or anyone that they have the right to life, live and coexist in any society without fearing for their lives. Muslims should be judged on their individual actions in the society, like every other human being, they should not be collectively held responsible for the heinous crimes of a few others.

I continued-

***your comments are disgusting, appalling, Muslimphobic, hateful and a danger to humanity. I am more than disappointed that you hold such disgusting views as i really did consider you a friend. This is not a simple matter of difference of opinion, i will not let you use my platform to spread such hate. I will block you the same way i block anyone one who spouts homophobic, biphobic or transphobic nonsense on my wall. Pls, kindly stop ANY kind of justification of this heinous act ON MY WALL. Any further comment hinting at all at justification or encouragement of this hate crime and terrorist action get you blocked immediately.

***I am really disappointed that an intelligent man like *** who I consider a friend would hold such extremist views. So sad. I hope he let go of such hate and understand that as evolved human beings, we have no justification for killing or encouraging the murder of innocent people for the crimes of others simply because they share a religion, skin colour or race. How barbaric!

His Australian friend seemed as confused about his line of reasoning as I was , she wrote-

Yemisi Ilesanmi and yet, yesterday he posted a video of the barbaric treatment of Irish by the English in the early 1800’s!

Now here he is defending this barbaric behaviour!! I just don’t understand his thinking.

I’m very disappointed 😔

However, our mutual friend wasn’t budging on his hate-filled murderous views-

Winge all you want as I really don’t care. Neither of you understand my point of view or respect it. I’m labelled a hater when you are both spitting venom at me, throwing hate speech at me. Yes I did load up a bit of English history but I don’t hate anyone over it. I don’t hate anyone, don’t hate Muslims but I am entitled to a opinion to what you believe is right or perhaps in your case ‘left’..

I had to let his fellow Australian know just how shocked I was by our mutual friend’s views-

*** When I first read ***’s comment, I almost thought his account was hacked! I find his comment so out of character. As an Atheist, I never hide the fact that I loathe religion, all type of religion. I and criticise Islam openly, just as I criticise Christianity which actually harmed me a lot while growing up and still harm me cos of my sexual orientation. However as an adult with a functioning brain, I know it is OK to criticise an ideology without calling for the death of innocent people who have done no harm to the society, just because they share or practise their ideology or religion. *** is sadly misguided.

I tried to call him out on calling his murderous, genocidal, oppressive view just an “Opinion” –

Get it into your head, it is not an OPINION to deny a whole group of people the Right to life because of their religion. That is a gross violation of their human right. You are sick in the head if you think you have the right to debate the right to life of innocent people who have committed no crime just because of their religion. You will not use my platform to spread your hate.

His fellow Australian tried to appeal further to his sense of reasoning-

*** you stated that Muslims created this situation.

Muslims did not create this situation, EXTREMISTS did.

I think you are so full of hate for a minority that you’re now persecuting the majority.

I’m not a believer in Religion but I certainly don’t hate those who are.

Also I want to refresh your somewhat lacking memory here. Not all terrorists are Muslims!!!!!

However our mutual friend wasn’t having any of it, logic was lost on him-

I don’t use the word hate as it is a vicious word. Calling me a hater, racist is offensive and wrong. There are 1 billion Muslims so they are not a minority. If they were a minority they are causing way to much death for such a group. If it was a peaceful group the world would not be on terror alert due to Islamic attacks I am aware of this problem, perhaps you are not but back to the original post before I was attacked. Did it actually cross your mind the act of retaliation by a member of the host nation may have been besotted by the grief of someone close to him who was killed, beaten, raped by one of these poor so called minority groups? You are also aware the location of the reprisal was a hub for Islamic haters of Western society?

At this point I was fed up with him –

What nonsense are you spewing, sounds like you’ve totally taken leave of your thinking faculty.

How has the supposedly 1 billion Muslim population you quoted harm you as a person or the society as a whole? How is the killing of innocent Muslims the solution to Islamist terrorism?

I asked you pertinent questions earlier, obviously you have not taken the time to logically ponder these questions or you are just too clouded by your hate and alarming ignorance to logically and honestly answer these questions.

I come from a country of about 120 million people and half of that population are Muslims. Boko Haram, the Islamist extremist group who have been terrorising the country have killed more Muslims than Christians or people of other religion. Muslims, who are predominant in the Northern part of Nigeria are integrated into the western, southern and Eastern part of the country.

There are many cases of families where one parent is Christian and the other Muslim. Do we now say because of the atrocities of Boko Haram, we should start killing Muslims in the country? Wouldn’t that lead to another civil war? Of what good are wars? Why advocate for the genocide of innocent people because you loathe their religion?

Your reasoning is very barbaric, ignorant, retrogressive and very inhumane. As *** said, you posted a video yesterday on your wall condemning the Irish genocide by British, now you are advocating for the genocide of Muslims. What a hypocrite you are.

Or is it OK to kill Muslims because you think they are sub-humans? Or you view Muslims as ‘Brown people’ therefore you think they are sub-humans?

You say you know your UK history, are you aware that IRA is classified as a terrorist group that carried out terrorist acts in UK? Was that a good enough reason to murder innocent Irish people? You clearly don’t think so as you condemned the Irish famine as genocide just yesterday. However, the hypocrite Musimphobe and possibly racist that you are is not willing to give Muslims same consideration. You cannot find it in your hate-filled heart to see Muslims in the same way as you see the Irish. I guess the Muslims are too brown for you to deserve basic human right.

You said the location of the terror attack was a hub for Islamic haters of western society. Are you aware that the Mosque in Finsbury Park was the first Mosque to win a National Award in UK? Until a few months ago, I live in North London, just a few stops from Finsbury park, and I can tell you it was a lovely place to live, A hotbed of London diversity.

You are a disappointment. I sincerely hope you will let logic cleanse your beclouded brain and not let hate to consume you so much. What you are advocating is genocide. There is no justification for genocide. I am greatly disappointed in you and disgusted by your comments. Pls, stay away from my wall until you learn how to behave like a decent human being again.

Did he get it? Did he find his brain and conscience again? No, he simply responded with this gem-

What a load of crap. Goodbye

Well, my parting shot was-

Good riddance to bad rubbish, Thanks for unfriending your Muslimphobic, subconsciously racist, ignorant ass from my Facebook page. I don’t need friends that call for genocides. Hate and ignorance fuel violence and you are now obviously a violent man. I hope you get the help you need before you constitute a nuisance to the society. You sound like a terrorist in the making. Goodbye.

Oh well, that was the end of that. Another friend lost to ignorance and hate. Probably many more will be lost as Brexit and Trump embolden people to show their inner racist, sexist and bigoted selves. Hopefully my now ‘ex-friend’ sees the errors of his ways before it is too late.

 

London Terror Attacks; Another Indictment on Islam

My beloved London was attacked again by primitive religious terrorists. 7 people were killed and 48 injured in an indiscriminate terror attack last night carried out on London bridge by 3 men who had what has now been confirmed as fake bombs strapped to their bodies.

Around 10pm on Saturday 3rd June 2017, the Islam terrorists ran their van over people on the London Bridge, jumped out of the van, and ran towards London Borough Market where they started stabbing people. Eyewitnesses reports have it that these barbarians screamed “This is for Allah”, while stabbing their victims and carrying out their nefarious attacks on innocent people. The police arrived at the scene swiftly and the three attackers were shot dead by armed police.

It is heart-breaking and utterly appalling. I went to bed heavy-hearted, and I was so reluctant to open my eyes this morning, I surely did not want to switch on my TV, the news was just too depressing.

What is wrong with these people? A lot, I would say, a lot!

What drives people to want to harm strangers?

What ideology makes you so inhuman that you derive pleasure in blowing people up?

What sense of martyrdom makes you so high that you would kill many innocent people in your suicide mission?

In these terror attacks, the barbarians don’t leave us wondering what their motives are. They scream it in our ears while they stab and blow up their victims. “This is for Allah”, they always scream, maniacally.

Yes, they did it for Allah, their beloved Skydaddy. They did it for their religious convictions. They will do it again in the name of their beloved prophet, Mohammed.

I am so tired of people trying to polemicize these terror attacks while reluctant to acknowledge the big role religion play in it.  Yes, politics is involved, but humans are political beings. We all have our political leanings and convictions, regardless of whether we are religious or not. However, in this modern day, only one group keeps grabbing the headline for terror attacks in the name of religion, and that is Islamists, and that religion is Islam.

I am so tired of people quickly rushing to affirm that Islam is a religion of peace. Well, if Islam is a religion of peace then the Quran must be the Holy International Peace Treaty!

I am no fan of any religion, if I had my way, it would be a criminal offence to teach religion in public schools or force children to pray to whatever imaginary being adults believe in.

I would say that Islam has a special place of contempt in my heart. I grew up as a Christian and it ruined my childhood. I blame religion and I lose intellectual respect for family members and friends who still spew religious nonsense. However, they are not going out stabbing people or encouraging blowing people up in the name of their Christian faith. Also, in the same vein, not all Muslims are running around stabbing and blowing people up in the name of Islam and their prophet, Mohammed.

Yes, the bible is a silly, violent book too, but unlike Islamist jihads, Christian jihads seems to be a thing of the past, although they do find their own nefarious ways to oppress people in the name of their SkyDaddy. For example, Christians in Nigeria, especially the big denominations, are mostly responsible for the ‘Jail the gay’ bill that was passed into law which stipulates 14 years imprisonment for anyone who engages in Same-Sex relationship and 10 years jail term for anyone who advocates for LGBT rights. So yeah, Christians are oppressors too. There is no excuse for forcing their religious beliefs, hate and silly holy book on everyone and into State laws and Policies.

I am so tired of people insisting that these terror attacks are solely about politics and not religion. Yes, politics is involved, but what is that powerful tool that these Islamist terrorists share, revere and kill for? It is Islam.

  • The conviction that they are killing for Allah.
  • The conviction that they will die a martyr for Allah.
  • The conviction that there will be 72 virgins waiting for them at the pearly gate.
  • The conviction that they are fulfilling the commandment of their religion,
  • The conviction that they have the backing of their beloved prophet, Mohammed to kill and maim unbelievers.
  • The conviction that they are following the commandment of the Quran to kill infidels.
  • The conviction that the humans they are killing are infidels and should be killed.
  • The conviction of their religion, Islam.

And guess what? According to their Holy Book, Quran, they are right.

The holy book of Islam is the Quran and the Quran commands the killing of infidels. The prophet Mohamed encouraged it. There is no modified version of that primitive, barbaric book called Quran. The Christian holy book is the Bible, at least they have tried to modify silly, primitive silly, violent book a bit, The New testament is still a book of silly myths and fiction but at least, it does not command as much violence as the old testament, which btw, still does not make it any good. The Quran on the other hand has not gone through such cleansing.

The Middle East is fraught with Political, State and Religious tensions. Religion and politics are at the heart of it, as are capitalism, greed, power, arms sales and interference from the west, sometimes wanted, sometime not so much.

However, the common denominator at the heart of the terrorists who carried out acts of terrorism and killed many innocent people in my motherland Nigeria, in my beloved city London, in Manchester, Paris, Germany, Belgium, Kenya etc is Religion, the Islam religion to be exact.

This is not rocket science, Religion is evil. Islam as it is a veritable ground for recruiting terrorists. Any ideology that serves as an excuse to commit such atrocities, is evil. As Voltaire said, “Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.” 

Blaise Pascal also said, “Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction”.

I have no respect for any religion as I have no regard for self-inflicted delusion. However, I must say again, Islam holds a special place of contempt in my heart for the fact that in this generation that I live in, it is the most used religion to inflict physical harm on innocent people. It is the religion used to recruit and groom modern day terrorists.

Does this make me an Islamphobe? If you think so, I think you need to get your head examined. I do not hate Muslims; however, I have nothing but contempt for their religion. I do not have an irrational fear of Islam; therefore, I am not Islamophobic. It is only logical that I have a rational fear and contempt for any ideology that commands that I be killed for being an infidel.  Here is a link to an interesting video about three surprising things you probably did not know about Islam and the Quran.

My heart goes to the families of the victims. It must have been a terrifying ordeal for everyone caught up in this latest barbaric assault on human lives.

I would say love shall win but even the terrorists believe their murderous actions are borne out of Love. Misplaced love for their religion. Misplaced love for their Allah. Misplaced love for their fanatic leaders. Misplaced love for their Prophet Mohamed.

Decent people call what these terrorists think is Love, Hate. I call them delusional and hate filled people. You must arbour a special kind of hate in your heart to be able to carry out these terror attacks on your fellow humans.

I sincerely look forward to a day when Religion, ALL RELIGION, is a thing of the past. A day when a new generation would ask perplexed

Why did our ancestors believe there was a God?”

How could they be so silly to kill for an imaginary being?”

“How terrible was the world then that they felt they needed to kill themselves for this dude called Allah?”  

Until them, stay safe and please, stop indoctrinating children with religion.

Related links- 

22 killed, 59 injured in Manchester Terrorist Attack; ISIS claims responsibility.

Islam Deserves No Respect From Me

The cancer called Religion!

 

Seasons Come, Seasons Go

Seasons come, Seasons go

Not everyone can handle the flow

Some flourish, Some Perish

Lessons learned, Moments cherished

 

Winter comes with its cold claws

An excuse to cover the flaws

Or a reason to grow

Hibernating on the down low

 

Spring with its blooming beauty

Doesn’t always chase away the gloom

Cleansing nooks and crannies with its broom

As part of life’s annual duty

 

Summer comes blazing in glorious sunshine

It is the time to wine and dine

But not everyone gets bathed in its glow

As beauty also comes with its woes and blows

 

Autumn with its changing colours

Creeps in with its slippery Fall

For survival, we crawl or maul

A time to hang on to the collar

 

Every season throws its curves

Life isn’t always a fountain of pleasure

Amidst its pains, I find my treasures

Every moment to cherish, and to Love

Copyright © – Yemisi Ilesanmi

 

22 killed, 59 injured in Manchester Terrorist Attack; ISIS claims responsibility.

I slept off yesterday with the breaking news that there was a sort of commotion at Manchester arena where pop singer, Ariana Grande was performing at a concert for her mostly young fans. The reports coming in then appeared to think it was just some malfunctioning wires or exploding speakers at the concert venue. However, I woke up this morning to the news that it was indeed another Terrorist Attack. I quickly called my family in Manchester to make sure they were OK.

The terrorist attack has so far claimed 22 lives, some of them children. 18-year-old sixth form student, Georgina Callender, has been confirmed as the first victim. Also, an eight-year-old girl, Saffie Rose Roussos, was also confirmed dead after becoming separated from her mother and sister. 59 persons are injured and receiving treatment in various hospitals in Manchester.

The police have arrested a 23-year-old man, Salman Abedi, in Manchester in connection with the bombing.

According to Chief constable Ian Hopkins:

We have been treating this as a terrorist incident and we believe that while the attack last night was conducted by one man, the priority is to establish whether he was acting alone or as part of a network.

The attacker, I can confirm, died at the arena. We believe the attacker was carrying an improvised explosive device, which he detonated, causing this atrocity.

Meanwhile, the Islamist State, (ISIS), has claimed responsibility for the attack. Although who knows if they were really responsible, after all, they seem eager to claim responsibility for every carnage these days, just to maintain relevance and strike fear in people.

It is beyond appalling how some people in the name of religion, some other hateful ideology or just out of pure evil, wake up and plan to murder innocent human beings. It is indeed a sad world we live in.

Humans have been killing humans for whatever reasons since time immemorial. Humans killed and enslaved fellow humans for land, colonialism, capitalism, religion and their imaginary skydaddy. It doesn’t look like it will get better any time soon. Maybe it is time we nuked ourselves and hope animals survive to rule the earth, the so called lower animals might just do a better job of it than we have.

Oh well, i guess this is the point where I say and hashtag, We Stand Together or Terrorism will be defeated.  The unfortunate reality is, as long as we have Religion, Humans, Insatiable Greed and Thirst for Power, I do not see how this is possible.

My heart goes to all the victims and the families and friends of the victims. For those who lost loved ones in this senseless attack, may you have the strength and support to get through this very difficult time. For those fighting for their lives in the hospitals, here is hoping you pull through and come out soon, as good as new.

I wish I could go far, far, far away from this planet, I have thought about it a lot lately but looks like I’m not only firmly anchored but stuck to this beautiful, life sustaining planet, condemned to live and interact with its many sadistic humans.

However, I know amidst every calamities and carnage caused by horrible human beings, there are lovely people helping out to make life just a little bit easier for the victims. The evils our fellow humans do sometimes bring out the best in us as humans as we go all out to provide help and safety for these affected. Here is hoping our humanity last longer than just when we are confronted and shocked by our fellow humans’ capacity for evil.

Let’s continue to do our best to make this world a better place. Most importantly, do your part to make religion a thing of the past. The world does not need more people who believe in Santa Claus, a blue eyed blonde Saviour called Jesus, a bearded paedophile prophet called Mohammed, or silly beliefs in a God given land, miracle wall, divine river, or an imaginary Skydaddy who intelligently designed the universe and now spend his time preparing a burning hell for those who do not believe in him, and 72 virgins for those who die as martyrs to glorify his name.

The world does not need more deluded beliefs. Do not pass your religious delusions to the next generation.

Let’s fully embrace education. Embrace intelligence. Embrace knowledge. Above all, teach, spread and practice love.

I heard with Love, all things are possible. Let’s give it a try and hope that it is not just another delusion sold to us. Peace!

 

Facebook banned me for saying Men Are Trash

Facebook banned me for posting excerpts from my blog post, Men Are Trash, on my Facebook wall, and deleted the posts. Facebook thinks it is hate speech.

Some Facebook and Instagram users have reported similar experience; not surprising as Facebook owns Instagram. I Probably got reported by some random blokes whose very existence confirms that Men are Trash.

I decided to make the blog post into a YouTube video and share on Facebook.  I plan to download it on my Facebook as a video, no doubt it will get me banned again, cos, Men and their fragile ego! #MenAreTrash.

 

Related Links- 

Men Are Trash 

Everyday Sexism: Catcalls and Street Harassment  

Let’s hang out on my YouTube Channel!

I haven’t been blogging or creating videos on my YouTube channel as much as I would love to. Sometimes, we need to take a backseat to avoid activism burn out. I’m happy to say I’m raring to go again!

I will be blogging more, and I plan to create more videos on my YouTube channel. If you are not a subscriber already, you should check out my channel and subscribe. 

YEMMYnisting is a space for me to share significant parts of my life with the public, comment on general issues, share my opinion and exchange ideas on happenings in the society.

My tagline is ‘Proudly Feminist, Proudly Bisexual and Proudly Atheist’. I make videos along these lines.
My videos touch a lot on Sexuality, Diversity, Atheism, Feminism and Race issues.

I identify as bisexual. I am from an ultra-homophobic / biphobic / transphobic environment. I use my videos to create awareness on sexual orientation and break the deafening silence on so called ‘taboo’ subjects.

I am the author of the advocacy book Freedom To Love For ALL: Homosexuality Is Not Un-African’. It is available in paperback and kindle on Amazon, I hope you will check it out and order your copy.

YEMMYnisting is also a place I talk about religion and my lack of belief in God(s).  Although I now reside in UK, I am an atheist from one of the most religious countries on planet earth, Nigeria.

One other great advantage of subscribing to my YouTube channel is that you get to hang out with me as I do my Dancexercise. I do love dancing, I can’t sing to save my life, but I’d sing and dance any day to get an endorphin rush. Also, it’s a great way to get fit, hence why I call it Dancexercise.

And speaking of getting fit, in my quest for endorphin rush, I found myself in the gym. The side effects included turning into a gym bunny. I shall be sharing some of my fitness videos, workouts, and tips with you.

Your constructive comments and suggestions are welcomed. If there are issues you’d like me to speak on or a song you’d like me to dance to in my dancexercise videos, please feel free to let me know.

I appreciate diverse views; however, I have zero tolerance for hate comments. Hate speech will get you banned.

You can also have more of me on

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Subscribe and let’s go on a logical ride to fun destinations. Thanks!