“Don’t mock Jim Bakker!” Why? Oh, Jehovah will get you if you do, because that’s Jim’s best buddy.
Saying that he is sick of people mocking him because some of his prophetic warnings have not yet come true, Bakker bellowed that “when God says something to you, you don’t always know the exact time it’s going to happen. [So] stop beating up the prophets because God says, ‘Woe unto you when you beat up on the prophets.’”
When anyone can declare themselves a prophet, pull shit out of their arse, and make their best guess, there’s isn’t much else to do but make a mockery of it all.
“God is speaking to his people,” he continued. “The only ones who probably aren’t talking to God these days are mean people in America, people who just are anti-Christ.”
Oh. Well, put me down as an anti-Christ meanie. If that god of yours is talking to most everyone, doesn’t that put you self-styled prophets on the cheap side? Dime a dozen and all that?
“If you don’t want to hear it, just shut me off,” Baker said. “Especially you folks that monitor me every day to try to destroy me. Just go away. You don’t have to be there, you don’t have to hear it. But one day, you’re going to shake your fist in God’s face and you’re going to say, ‘God, why didn’t you warn me?’ And He’s going say, ‘You sat there and you made fun of Jim Bakker all those years. I warned you but you didn’t listen.’”
Perhaps, given your sensitivity, you should send up a shout to Jehovah to harden your heart, Jim. That godmonster of yours is good at that one. Perhaps you could teach it how to thicken your skin. Seems to me you’re being terribly self-centered, and don’t you christians love claiming persecution? I won’t be shaking my fist in Jehovah’s face, Jim, because it doesn’t exist. If it did exist, I’m pretty sure “made fun of Jim Bakker” wouldn’t even make the cut for the sin list. I just know you cry frustrated tears over not having a god that would send bears along to eat up all us anti-Christ meanies. Perhaps that’s your ticket, Jim – get people to make fun of your bald head, [2 Kings 2:23-34] and maybe Jehovah will come through with the bears. Or something.
