I felt a tear trickled down my eye as I watched the video of the creepy Bishop Charles Ellis groping Ariana Grande on live TV during the legendary Aretha franklin’s burial ceremony. Ariana’s nervous laughter, the uncomfortable feeling on her face, her not wanting to disrespect a creepy elder or cause a scene were all too familiar feelings. These are feelings and emotions women know all too well when groped by a man, especially a revered man in position of authority. This is just so disgusting and unacceptable.
I don’t understand how anyone could justify this behaviour, try to make excuse for the pastor, or even blame it on Ariana’s short dress! However, we live in a sexist, patriarchal society, where misogynists excuse away these unfortunately daily occurrences faced by millions of women, famous and not so famous, all over the world.
Some have said it was a case of height difference. Height difference my foot. This pastor could have touched her on the shoulder or most preferably, kept his hands to himself and not touch her at all. Instead, he chose to grab her by her side boob, and not only that, he kept fondling her. Even when the poor young woman tried to nervously get away, the creepy older man pulled her right back and kept fondling her! How is that even acceptable? How could anyone make excuse for that kind of entitled behaviour? How could anyone not be disgusted at the video and pics?
It is sad that we live in a society where pastors can do no wrong in the face of their members. Sheep indeed. I shudder to think of what this pastor could have been getting away with, outside the prying eyes of the camera, in the name of welcoming his young women members.
People took to Twitter and other Social media to condemn the creepy behaviour of the Bishop with the hashtag #RespectArianaAndAll women.
It has been reported in the news that the Pastor has apologised to Ariana. But, wait a minute, was it really a remorseful apology or just some crap he came up with to placate us ‘sensitive’ people?
This creepy pastor sorry excuse of an apology does not even cut it, what does he mean by-
It would never be my intention to touch any woman’s breast
Oh really, what did you think you were touching when you grabbed her, and kept squeezing and fondling her side boob, or were you suddenly doing the lord’s work by giving her a mammogram live on TV?
Maybe I crossed the border, maybe I was too friendly or familiar
What is with all the “Maybes”? There is no Maybe, you creepy pervert, you crossed the line! You saw these videos and pictures, yet you dared to say “Maybe”. That is not a sign of remorse. How could you watch the videos and pics and not be disgusted with yourself, unless of course it is familiar behaviour to you, one you have been engaging in so many times, so much that you don’t see anything wrong with it.
Your apology suggests in your entitled man’s eyes, you think we are overreacting. Your nonpology is not good enough, Bishop Charles Ellis. Women are tired of men like you who feel entitled to our bodies. I bet the holy spirit in you wouldn’t have felt the need to welcome so familiarly a 75-year-old woman the way you suddenly felt you needed to welcome,nay grope, 25 year old Ariana Grande. You are a creepy perverted man. You should be ashamed of yourself.
But again, I apologise.
Your apology should come without a “But”. Apologise, Full stop, no But.
Educate yourself, Bishop Charles Ellis. Educate men in your congregation about how not to be a creep. Take lessons to unlearn patriarchal, sexist, misogynistic behaviours and languages. Accept that like every other trash man out there, you feel entitled to touch women inappropriately, without their consent, and do something to change it.
Men, educate yourself. Women are not objects put on earth to satisfy your desires. We are not here to be aesthetically pleasing to your eyes. We are not here for you to whistle at, catcall, and touch without our consent.
Men, you are not entitled to a woman’s body. It does not matter what we wear or not wear. It does not matter what our age is. It does not matter what our class or status in society is. You cannot touch us without our explicit consent. Period.
To all the brainwashed women blaming Ariana for her short dress, get it into your thick skulls that what women wear is never a reason to sexually harass or assault them. No, women are not asking for sexual harassment, assault, inappropriate touching, cat calls or rape just because we put on a short dress or wear revealing body hugging clothes.
It is not our fault that you think so low of men as to think men are unevolved, uncontrollable wild animals who can’t control themselves around women with short or revealing clothes. Women are not responsible for regulating or controlling men’s urges. It is not our responsibility. What we wear is our choice. It is not an invitation for sexual assault. Our body, our choice. Our explicit consent matters.
Also, what was that ignorant joke Bishop Charles made about mistaking Ariana Grande’s name of the program for a new menu on Taco Bell? Really, that man needs deliverance, fast too! His level of ignorance is pathetic. How can he be expected to be a leader when he is so ignorant himself? Oh wait… he knows the bible, I guess that’s all the education he needs to lead a congregation. What a shame.
Marcus Ranum says
Yeah, I bet he’s gonna forgive himself pretty quickly.
Trickster Goddess says
Added on to all that misogynistic entitlement is the arrogance that he thought he could get away with doing it in front of all those cameras.
For those who blame what women are wearing for their sexual assault, I pose this hypothetical question: “If a woman is walking down the street naked, is it OK if someone rapes her?”
Robert, not Bob says
Male preachers always seem to be grabby, in the big, tight, you-aren’t-going-anywhere type of grip. It’s a power gesture, which would be disturbing even if it weren’t also sexual.
Just imagine what he does when he’s not on national TV.
What a disgusting man.
Also, sadly, what marcus said sounds all too true.
N. Khumalo says
Please allow me to comment on Gabs’ tweet. I once had a friend some years ago who told me something about sexual attractions between men and women. I haven’t explored or enquire about other races directly, so all I know is from people of my own race. You are very much and very much more than correct about women being not subjects and yes, you are correct about short dresses being not an invitation but totally correct.
This I know but if I am wrong then I stand to be corrected, and please help me with the correct information. To white people a point of attraction from men to women is the breast, while on the black race it’s the buttocks, thighs and hips. So, the way one (a women) dresses is not or may not be an invitation for men but it does do something reason being men are asexually aroused simply just by seeing where as with women it is either by words or by being touched.
First, let’s can the talk about “race”. I am a white male, and heterosexual, but you have no idea what I am attracted to in a woman -- and whatever it is, it has zero to do with my “race.”
Secondly, the point of all the complaints seems to by flying right over your head -- it doesn’t matter one particle whether the man there is “aroused” by Ms. Grande. Men are not machines, they have free will and (in theory, anyway) a working brain, so him keeping his hands off her is ENTIRELY his problem, not hers.
Would it have been too much to just hold her hand in that situation?
Marcus Ranum says
To white people a point of attraction from men to women is the breast, while on the black race it’s the buttocks, thighs and hips.
You’re jerking our chains, are you?
prince AY Alvin says
this pastor must be among the possessed pastors, what she is wearing doesn’t matter , no matter what I think women needs some respect.