I Wonder What This Cost?


Bulk mailing a big chunk of Pennsylvania has to be a bit expensive, right? Or maybe not. Perhaps I should write some of my own poetry and bulk mail everyone; then I can claim I am “widely published” or something.

Pennsylvania is part of the “burned over” area of the US where various christian chucklefuck cults originated, spread, anathematized one another, and died. My guess is that this is someone appealing to their ‘base’ – except that their base is on the dark side of the moon, or something.

Positive survival is not possible on this continent

Yes, that’s true. But there’s a reason I live in the mountains on a great big chunk of limestone with a sheer drop to a river (aka: “drainage”) as I told my banker when I got my mortgage, “if I need flood insurance you guys will be in serious trouble.” I’m 2,000 feet higher than Clearfield, which does flood.

UFOs are going to lead us all to the promised land, if our behavior is strict!

Oh it’s quoting Revelations? Bah, even the ancient christians knew that was just some sociopathic loner sitting out in the middle of noplace posting blog-rants. Don’t they have any idea how easy that shit is to write?

And on the third day I saw rising
from the sea that which forever sleeps
like student loan debt, great Cthulhu,
casting all before him like Skittles(tm) for
his degustation. Ia! And the golfers ran
but they did not make it to cover in time.

Comments

  1. Reginald Selkirk says

    Pennsylvania is part of the “burned over” area of the US where various christian chucklefuck cults originated, spread, anathematized one another, and died.

    Not according to any sources I have found.
    Burned-over district

    The Burned-over District refers to the western and central regions of New York State in the early 19th century, where religious revivals and the formation of new religious movements of the Second Great Awakening took place, to such a great extent that spiritual fervor seemed to set the area on fire…

  2. cvoinescu says

    I went to atabase.info, and what the everloving fuck? I was so confused I couldn’t even find what they were selling.

  3. jrkrideau says

    @3 cvoinescu
    Who know but this declaimer has me wondering; “ALL BENEFITS OF 5-D TECHNOLOGY ARE CONTROLLED UNDER UNIVERSAL LAW AND ARE NOT OFFERED OR REPRESENTED TO BE SPECIFICALLY NOR GENERALLY AVAILABLE DURING POINT #1 OF ARMAGEDDON.”

    It is starting to look like a university–based spoof as exam period approaches.

  4. Ridana says

    The Armageddon Time Ark Base (A.T.A.Base) Operation, formerly known as The Outer Dimensional Forces (ODF), is a UFO cult based in Weslaco, TX since the mid 60s. It was started by a lumberyard owner named Orville T. Gordon in 1963 after a dispute over taxes (it’s always taxes, isn’t it?). He closed the lumberyard, changed his name to O.T. Nodrog (yep), and started his cult. An ATF raid in ’85 yielded a dozen weapons, but it’s TX, so that’s not out of the ordinary. The Walmart, Pizza Hut and other businesses next door have been trying to get them out for years, to no avail. So I guess when the aliens land to retrieve them, they can grab some lunch and a 24-pack of tube socks before they take off.

    http://roswellbooks.com/museum/?page_id=466

  5. says

    Reginald Selkirk@#1:
    Not according to any sources I have found.
    Burned-over district

    I got that wrong.
    If you spend any time in the non-urban parts of Pennsylvania, you’ll see how easy it was to make that mistake. There are weird-ass cults all over the place – dozens of varieties of amish, mennonites, and other taliban. They even have tent revivals around here sometimes. It’s unsettling.

  6. says

    jrkrideau@#5:
    Who know but this declaimer has me wondering; “ALL BENEFITS OF 5-D TECHNOLOGY ARE CONTROLLED UNDER UNIVERSAL LAW AND ARE NOT OFFERED OR REPRESENTED TO BE SPECIFICALLY NOR GENERALLY AVAILABLE DURING POINT #1 OF ARMAGEDDON.”

    Maybe it’s a typo and an oblique reference to the bullshit marketing surrounding T-Mobile and AT&T’s 5G roll-outs?

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