Are Creepypastas Real?

You can’t explain this

The other day, I was curious if there was any news on the search for the ‘true’ origins of the famous creepypastas images of yore. For instance, the hunt for the original Jeff the Killer image’s origin. (In case anyone is not aware, Creepypasta are internet horror stories/urban legends posted on a variety of sites, which were very popular in the 2010s, Slenderman being the most famous of them.) But while searching ‘creepypasta debunked’ I found this curious suggested question come up on Google.

Are Creepypasta real or fake?

Are creepypastas real or fake?

 

Well, it had never occurred to me to wonder if internet stories by users named SlimeBeast or OrangeSoda were actually true accounts, so I figured I should probably take a look. I was pleased to see all the top results informed me that indeed, no Creepypastas were real, and they were all fictional. However, someone in the comments disagreed.

 

Ok go to youtube and type in creepypasta caught on camera i had watched how do you explain that when you watch it and stop telling people on here that they are not real people can believe that they are real dang people have that right to think they are real and you don’t know every thing so stop you do not know if they are real how do you know they could be real i am so tired of you telling this mind your own bisness

 

Well, that’s a very postmodern view of it, I suppose. All this reminded me of this time I had found a translation of the famous surreal poem Tomino’s Hell, which had gotten wrapped up into a Creepypasta that claimed if you read it out loud you would die or something.

Author David Bowles has a great translation on his site of this beautiful poem, along with this hilarious comments section. I found an interesting attitude on some of these (hopefully underage) people.

Legend says that if you read it outloud you’ll die but I don’t believe that’s true

 

Voice of reason Bayley here doesn’t think it’s real.

 

This is a great poetry to read to my teacher but I watched a YouTube named jaystaystion read both out loud and a weird demon face and hands start comming and you can see the face and hands in the wall it’s really creepy so I tried reading it to my friends at school it it would coming through the walls of the school but great job with the English translation.

 

Bethany appreciates the translation, but was surprised to see that no demon face and hands emerged from a wall when she read it to her friends at school. Now, this is the interesting attitude I mentioned. Some of these kids are downright disappointed that they didn’t die or get cursed.

I just read the hole thing and yet still fails. Nothing shows up for the 2 time why is it not working?

 

Caleb says, what gives?

I already did. And I’m ready for my third go at reading this, I’m waiting for said curse already. I’ve already read it twice in Japanese and twice in English. . . WHEN IS THE DAMN CURSE?!?! TwT

 

Liz writes multiple comments, wondering why she hasn’t gotten cursed yet.

 

Bruh isn’t this supposed to kill you if you read this out loud Y’all are gonna die while I’m laughing at your funerals and you will be looking down at me, haunting me, While I don’t give a shit. Nothing scares me. || Same dude i read it multiple tumes in a row and nothing happened

 

Unknown tries to warn the others, while also making sure to note that they are not scared by anything. Tomino is similarly unscared.

Hi I read the curse out loud and now my sockets in the house don’t work is there a way to get rid of the curse? I tried everything, please help me if you can. Don’t know what will help but I need to get rid of it || Hrm. Maybe read it backward?

 

Tania would like to submit a ticket, and our translator attempts to help out.

 

I read it in japanese but it still dont work… IM STILL ALIVE AND IM VERY WELL!!! This Legend is fake, u can read it! ;3 || Did you read it correctly? || Yup, I know how to pronounce japanese stuff. ….cuz I watch a hella lot of anime…but it doesn’t work….

 

Sam has cleared it all up for everyone, likely having watched a hella lot of anime in preparation. So, be not afraid, reading cursed surrealist poetry.

It’s Bandcamp Friday

Today is Bandcamp Friday, a day when the site waives its usual cut of music purchases so more money goes directly to the artists. This practice began at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic and truly shifted the indie music landscape, with many artists timing their releases specifically for these days. Even if you aren’t into contemporary indie music, take a look around, you might be surprised by which old favorites are on there. You can find new music by The Dead Milkmen, Einstürzende Neubauten, Thom Yorke, Shonen Knife, and classic tracks from Fugazi, Pixies, Ladytron, Skinny Puppy,  John Carpenter has released tons of film scores and new ‘soundtracks’ for movies that don’t exist, and David Lynch’s collection is there too. There are plenty of game soundtracks there too, and I’m really fond of this one for Inscryption and Hypnospace Outlaw has 3 volumes but the second is my favorite. Besides digital tracks, many artists sell CDs, vinyl, and even cassette tapes. Today I thought I would recommend a contemporary artist, which is the local band, Nox Novacula.

Nox Novacula

Stooges inspired? Or the Doors? Both?

I saw these guys live right before the pandemic, when they were opening for practically every show in the area, and they seem to still be touring regularly. They’re a very classic sounding deathrock band, and the singer has a powerful voice reminiscent to me of Grace Slick. They have a few different albums and I recommend all of them if you like old school goth and deathrock. And if they happen to be playing live in your area they put on a great show too. Here’s a performance from a few years ago, I think around the time I saw them, as I recall the singer’s fancy shorts.

And to think…

(Me, arriving to FTB)

 

Hello! My name is Joseph Kelly, husband of FTB’s own Bébé Mélange at Life’s a Gas. I did a couple of guest posts over there long ago. Recently I had gotten a few ideas for posts that may amuse you all so after all this time I decided to start this blog. Now you can know who comes up with all of GAS’s best ideas! I plan to do more posts about horror movies, etymology, weird old websites no one remembers, gardening, and vampires.