This for the FtB legal defense fund. See [go fund me] for details. Rules are below:
cubist wins with a bid of $26! Thank you for supporting FTB!
If you’re observant, you may notice that this is not a knife.
It’s a 10″ platteroid in ambrosia maple. Since it’s ambrosia maple, it has some worm-holes and spalting. But it has crazy grain that is unique and interesting from every angle and at every distance.
I will also say that I don’t expect this to fetch anything near what a knife fetches. In terms of time spent, this was about an hour’s work whereas some of my knives consume nearly a week (spread over a month) – ah, the joy of wipe-on finish, as opposed to polished-in. Wood is so easy and fun, and sanding (the worst part of any project) is a snap on a lathe when your object is rotating at 1500rpm – the hard part is not burning your fingertips if the sandpaper heats up.
This is not dishwasher safe and is probably not great at dealing with moisture in general. It’d be good for a decorator thingie, or putting on a republican’s head to use for target practice (it’s only about an inch high, see…)
You can bid in the comments, or bid by emailing me [link]. If you email, I will assume that you wish to remain anonymous and will post a comment in the bidding section that reads: “Anonymous bid in the amount of $___”
Whoever bids the most for the commission wins it for $1 more than the second highest bidder bid. For example, if I bid $75 and Joe bids $5 and I’m the highest bidder, that makes Joe the second highest bidder, and I win the thing for $6. This is a variation of the Ebay bidding algorithm and, while it is less effective at milking money from the bidders, it discourages people from feeling that they need to log in at the last minute and try to bid over someone else. At the time when bidding closes, whichever bid is the highest, whether it’s email or a comment, wins.
The winner is expected to donate the agreed-upon amount to the defense fund and send me suitable proof (a screenshot or whatever) and give me a shipping address, at which point I’ll box it up and send it along!
Since we don’t have an automated bidding system like Ebay, I’d like to discourage “auction sniping.” If you want the thing, bid what you’re willing to pay for it and just see what happens. If you simply must have it, bid $1million for it and if the second highest bidder bids $50, it’s yours for $51.
If you do not win, you owe nothing!
AUCTION CLOSES March 29, AT 10:00AM EST
My comment settings require manual approval for the first comment from a person. If you comment and don’t see it, I’ll get it, fear not. If you email me and do not get an acknowledgement, and you are gmail user, check your spam box. Google’s spam algorithms don’t like me for reasons I have never cared to figure out.
I’ll start things off with a low ball bid of $25.
I’ll put in a $100 bid.
Just an Organic Regular Expression says
This is not a stable bidding algorithm; it is too easy to embarrass a wild bidder. Say somebody (with FTB’s best interests in mind of course) puts in a bid for $900K, the happy $1M bidder is suddenly on the hook for $900,001. So be a little careful with those $1M bids…
Marcus Ranum says
Just an Organic Regular Expression@#4:
This is not a stable bidding algorithm; it is too easy to embarrass a wild bidder. Say somebody (with FTB’s best interests in mind of course) puts in a bid for $900K, the happy $1M bidder is suddenly on the hook for $900,001.
Nope, the way it works is, if I bid $1m, then nobody can bid $900k because $1m is the current high bid.
I do need to fix my algorithm, because the first bidder could bid $1m and get the item for $1 if there was no lower accepted bid. But I’m expecting people to play fair here and I reserve the right to not accept any bid.
Can I reduce my bid to $40? I don’t want to discourage anyone from bidding it up…
The bowl (platter?) arrived today. Not friggin’ bad! Showed it to my landlord, who was favorably impressed. Sweet! Thank you, Marcus.