President Pottymouth.

Johan Olander, “President Pottymouth” (2017), inkjet on matte photo paper with hand-painted enamel additions, 8.5 x 11 inches.

President Donald J Trump’s official portrait is so rich in infantile machismo that mockery is inevitable. Look at it for minute and you can’t but help to want to distort it in order to show its true nature.

Via Hyperallergic.

The Rowboat Bath.

Some ideas were best discarded. This is one of them, from 1916.

The rowboat bath is the newest contribution to the physical enjoyment of living.

The rowboat bath is the newest contribution to the physical enjoyment of living.

"The rowing-bath has been perfected in a western sanitarium for the purpose of adding zest to the morning plunge. It is valuable as a curative measure, but it may also be used with enjoyment and benefit by any one. The rowing-bath consists of a metal container which is attached to the nozzle of an ordinary tub by means of a rubber cord sufficiently strong to give the element of exercise. Entering the tub, the bather attaches the rowing device and turns on the cold water. As it pours into the tube he scoops up the water and, pulling the container toward him with a rowing motion, empties it full upon his breast, thus securing the zest which accompanies the pleasant pastime of buffeting surf. This bath is a diversion from the ordinary "shower" on a hot summer day."

The rowing-bath has been perfected in a western sanitarium for the purpose of adding zest to the morning plunge. It is valuable as a curative measure, but it may also be used with enjoyment and benefit by any one.

The rowing-bath consists of a metal container which is attached to the nozzle of an ordinary tub by means of a rubber cord sufficiently strong to give the element of exercise. Entering the tub, the bather attaches the rowing device and turns on the cold water. As it pours into the tube he scoops up the water and, pulling the container toward him with a rowing motion, empties it full upon his breast, thus securing the zest which accompanies the pleasant pastime of buffeting surf. This bath is a diversion from the ordinary “shower” on a hot summer day.”

I wonder how many people bought this ridiculous thing before it sank into obscurity. Looking at that picture, all I can envision is what a mess it would make, and it wouldn’t be the male enthusiastic ‘rower’ who cleaned it all up, either.

Via The Public Domain.

Katerina Kamprani: The Uncomfortable.

Katerina Kamprani has some very interesting and entertaining work:

All the objects you will see in this website are deliberately designed to annoy you.

This project started after I failed to finish my studies in industrial design around 2011 and it has continued to grow ever since. My goal is to deconstruct the invisible design language of simple everyday objects and tweak their fundamental properties in order to surprise you and make you laugh. But also to help you appreciate the complexity and depth of interactions with the simplest of objects around us. As a poor designer I have started the project by making conceptual 3d visualisations, but recently I have decided to spend all my savings to produce prototypes, because what would the world be if there were no Uncomfortable objects out there?

Many of these did make me laugh, but there was also a sense of cynical despair, because if these objects were marketed, people would buy them. The concrete umbrella would become a popular garden ornament. The thick buttons would become a new anti-fashion fashion statement. The wineglass would become a new party drinking game favourite. The chain fork would become fashionable jewelry. Ms. Kamprani is in Athens, but here in uStates, people have become such slaves to marketing, I don’t think there would be a problem in selling any of Ms. Kamprani’s prototypes. I certainly wouldn’t be surprised to see unscrupulous people taking advantage.

You can visit Ms. Kamprani’s site to see more.

Dear Fashion Magazine Editors…

I guess Melania is used to wearing heels around a disaster area.

Like everyone else the other day, I rolled my eyes over Ms. Trump heading into Texas on 4 inch spikes. The sheer inappropriateness of these vulgarians is always and never surprising. What would be truly fabulous, though, is if one (or all ) the powerhouse fashion mags published serious articles on how to be stylish and practical when touring disaster areas – avoid those embarrassing fashion faux pas with our guide! If only the editors had the spine to do so, that would be one happy and grand statement.

 

Trump White Hood & Rubber Sheets.

I maybe ruined this, but for a brief moment there were KKK hoods & piss proof sheets in the trump tower gift shop.

Hee. Some artists had fun in the Trump Tower gift shop.

Shoppers looking for MAGA hats at Trump Tower this week may have encountered a Ku Klux Klan hood or a photo of President Putin, and asked themselves whether what they were seeing was real merchandise.

On Monday afternoon, two NYC-based artists secretly slipped some items inside the merchandising outpost of the Trump Tower’s lower lobby. Among them: A Trump-emblazoned KKK hood “for fine people,” sealed packages of pee-proof rubber sheets, and a Russian flag. In the front of the store, a postcard display featured the 45th President of the United States, Vladimir Putin, along with cards paying tribute to First Lady Ivanka Trump, and the flap of flesh near the president’s throat area, known as a Wattle.

Artists are the best! And a massive Well Done! in this case.

“We thought the tourists coming in to buy some stuff, especially people from other countries, should get the whole story of who the president is, because the items in the Trump store don’t accurately reflect the person,” one of the two artists, who asked that we not reveal his name, told Gothamist.

Those actual items in the restroom-adjacent newsstand include an oddly-muscular bobblehead of the president ($40), a “Melania Trump First Lady License” ($4), and a mousepad featuring all 45 presidents.

Next door, a kiosk sells Official merchandise, including the Trump Signature Collection cufflinks ($45), a painted gold coin bank ($20), and Trump golf towels and putter covers ($30).

[…]

Asked if he was concerned that the current administration might be too absurd to satirize, our underground source admitted that was a possibility. “My partner was in the back putting in some of the items and he said to someone, ‘Oh did you see this?’ and they didn’t even bat an eye.”

Neither did the people who work in the store, at least for a little while. As of Tuesday morning, the Putin/Ivanka/Wattle postcards were still on display—though the shopkeeper did notice when we attempted to buy one of the cards, and quickly ordered us out of the store while calling security. Upon returning an hour later, all of the items appeared to be gone.

“Every time you think you’re going to get Trump on something, he outdoes the parody,” explained the tipster. “He hasn’t started selling white hoods yet, but after that batshit speech he gave two floors up—well if there’s enough money to be made, he’d probably start.”

The Gothamist has the full story.

What A Soul Looks Like.

Oh, souls. There are those who are insistent that souls are real, in spite of them being intangible and invisible. They have much in common with the invisible pink unicorn. I’ve been immersed in Medieval manuscripts again, and came across a depiction of the weighing of a soul, and a woman carrying a soul. Click images for full size!

The weighing of a soul.

A woman carrying a soul.

There’s one mystery cleared up, eh? :D

Via The British Library.

Vietato Lamentarsi.

Courtesy Vatican Insider-La Stampa.

VATICAN CITY (Reuters) – If anyone had any doubts how Pope Francis feels about people who always complain, the answer is now tacked to the door of his frugal suite in a Vatican residence: “No Whining”.

Under the explicit warning, the red-and-white Italian language sign goes on to say that “violators are subject to a syndrome of always feeling like a victim and the consequent reduction of your sense of humor and capacity to solve problems”.

A picture of the sign was posted on the Vatican Insider website and its presence on the pope’s door confirmed to Reuters by its editor-in-chief Andrea Tornielli, an author who is close to Francis and has interviewed him several times.

The sign is adorned with the international symbol for ‘no’ – a backslash in a circle.

It adds: “The penalty is doubled if the violation take place in the presence of children. To get the best out of yourself, concentrate on your potential and not on your limitations.”

I’d like to see those signs plastered all over the place. Reuters has the full story.

Have $99900?

HUNT WITH THE TRUMP BROTHERS$99900 (RUSSIA).*

JOIN THE HUNT THIS FALL,,, WE’LL BE KILLING SOME BIG CATS, I MEAN BIG, REALLY BIG,THE BIGGEST .,, WE”LL BE KILLING SOME PRAIRIE DOGS AND COYOTES TOO,,, PUTIN MIGHT EVEN SHOW UP ,,,
.MAKE YOURSELF PROUD. TEACH YOUR DAUGHTERS TO KILL WHEN THEY’RE YOUNG,,, .GREAT DEAL, THE GREATEST DEAL,,TRUST ME ,,,, INCLUDES TRUMP STEAKS,,TRUMP WINE,, TRUMP WATER,TRUMP TIES ,TRUMP HATS, TRUMP TEE SHIRTS,,,ALL MADE IN CHINA AND MEXICO,,MAKE RESERVATIONS NOW.,, TAX FREE,,
,,,, HELP SUPPORT CHUMP UNIVERSITY AND CASINOS. ,,,HEALTH CARE FOR EVERYBODY.. LETS MAKE AMERICA GREAT A GAIN,,,. GROPING ALLOWED ,.,,,GOD BLESS AMERICA.

*Not for real, people.

Now, why can’t we have ad which reads: Hunt The Trump Brothers, This Fall!

Via Craigslist.

Cool Stuff Friday.

Go and watch David Firth’s Cream on Vimeo. You won’t be sorry, this is one of the coolest, most pointed, and terrifying things I’ve seen in a long time. Great.

Have a new pet and want something on the different side for a name? Check out Medieval Pet Names.

You can now have art texted to you from SFMOMA!

In a world oversaturated with information, we asked ourselves: how can we generate personal connections between a diverse cross section of people and the artworks in our collection? How can we provide a more comprehensive experience of our collection?

Enter Send Me SFMOMA. Send Me SFMOMA was conceived as a way to bring transparency to the collection while engendering further exploration and discussion among users. Send Me SFMOMA is an SMS service that provides an approachable, personal, and creative method of sharing the breadth of SFMOMA’s collection with the public.

Text 572-51 with the words “send me” followed by a keyword, a color, or even an emoji and you’ll receive a related artwork image and caption via text message. For example “send me the ocean” might get you Pirkle Jones’ Breaking Wave, Golden Gate; “send me something blue” could result in Éponge (SE180) by Yves Klein; and “send me 💐” might return Yasumasa Morimura’s An Inner Dialogue with Frida Kahlo (Collar of Thorns). Each text message triggers a query to the SFMOMA collection API, which then responds with an artwork matching your request.

You can read more about this here.

Portrait of Ruth Saint-Denis, a copy of which is in the BAM Archives (1920) (via Library of Congress/Wikimedia).

From an 1869 advertisement for a lecture by Frederick Douglass, to production photographs of the 2012 revival of Philip Glass and Robert Wilson’s Einstein on the Beach, the Leon Levy BAM Digital Archive contains more than 70,000 items chronicling over 150 years of theatrical history at the Brooklyn Academy of Music (BAM). The online platform for the BAM Hamm Archives was launched last month, including collections of posters, playbills, building photographs, and audio and video recordings.

Hyperallergic has the full story.