I find this video absolutely fascinating. I have no idea what a pentatonic scale is and how it differs from the other scales that are there out there. I tried to read up on it and, as it is usual with music, I comprehended none of it. And no, do not try and explain this to me, it is a waste of time (despite rq’s and consciousness razor’s best efforts in the past, I still have no clue what bar and meter are).
But even so, I was able to hum this melody along, I understood what the next tone in the scale should be on an instinctive level and that simple melody has proven to be a real earworm, I could not get rid of it for days.
Open thread, talk whatevers, just don’t be an a*hole about it.
Giliell
How incredibly stupid of her, risking both of their lives like that.
The Pentatonic scale is to the 36 major and minor scales as I-IV-V 12 bar chord progressions are to songwriting as a whole. They’re easy to learn and either extremely limiting (if you lack creativity) or contain enough variety to build an entire genre of unique music if you have talent (e.g. Blues, Rock and Roll).
@ Previous thread’s 98. Giliell :
( https://freethoughtblogs.com/affinity/2020/05/19/tnet-39-jelles-marble-runs/#comment-55468 )
Congratulations and yikes. Glad it ended well but yeah, that’s awful and I can’t even begin tofathom what she was thinking there.. giving birth alone! Letting your partner sleep though it?! What the .. ?! Why the ..!?
***
Random endangered species item :
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/05/science/colombia-wax-palms-biodiversity.html
Great article with some cool video sweeping up the trunks and forests of the tallest monocot and specifically tallest palm tree (Columbia’s national tree, one you can make candles from and a tree that dates the Andes mountains) in the world which I thought was really fascinating there.
Some good news on removing colonial names and restoring Indigenous ones here :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-07-03/wa-king-leopold-ranges-renamed-wunaamin-miliwundi-ranges/12416254
Plus another Aussie news item on a long-running racism issue here :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-07-04/sam-newman-settles-dispute-with-nicky-winmar-over-racism-protest/12422472
where again the racists have now lost.
Loverly video.
I cannot carry a tune in a bucket with a lid. But I sang along with Bobby.
trust me
I have to correct myself.
She didn’t let her partner sleep, she let the two older kids sleep, he was at night shift. I just can’t.
I gave up. Wife and I just bought a room air conditioner. fter five days of 90+ weather and forcast for seven or more more.
Nice to make whoopee in the summer in the afternoon without sweating endlessly.
Another link or 3 hopefully of interest here :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-07-04/black-lives-matter-racism-sudanese-refugee/12388444
Thought-provoking perspective here
https://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-53235909
On the very superluminous star in a dwarf galaxy that seems to have vanished perhaps literally into a black hole.
&
https://www.abc.net.au/news/science/2020-07-04/july-sky-guide-full-moon-and-beyond/12416474
For the Southern Hemisphere and a bit late really but still. (Note a lot can still be seen and applies for both hemispheres too and sights for past this weekend too.)
@ 5. Giliell : Yeah, that makes a little difefernce but still, to give birth alone and risk everything like that & risk havingthose older kids find you if something did go wrong. I just can’t understand or imagine why anyone would do that.
Now it’s done. I have submitted my thesis for grading and applied for graduation, the work is out of my hands. The last seven months have been some of the best and some of the most stressful times in my life. I loved it before I had to start working from home. From late March to the end of May was the worst time, it was difficult to concentrate at home. June and the opening of public saunas made things better.
Now it’s time to make job applications and hope for the best. But also the time to relax and the time to self-educate and work on my programming skills. All three things in a good balance.
Ice Swimmer
Well done! You certainly deserve some relaxation, good luck with the job hunting and I hpe you enjoy the self-educating.
Ice Swimmer, Congratulations! Best wishes for success in the future.
Ice Swimmer -- Congrats!
Congratulations, Ice Swimmer!
I remember getting a nougat muffin to celebrate when I handed in mine. 10 minutes later I got an email stating that I had submitted a thesis with an incorrect topic. Turned out my professor had made a typo when she registered it. I almost puked out my muffin again.
+++
I haven’t forgotten y’all, I’ve just been busy with the little one finishing primary school, school year ending and #1 officially becoming a teenager.
Thank you, all!
I seems that a difference between Germany and Finland (or at least our universities) is that I have had to make all the applications (topic and grading, all done eletronically) and the professor only has had to agree or disagree that my applications should be presented to the Degree Programme Committee meeting (of course, he’ll be the one proposing the grade for my thesis). For topic approval, I had to ask the professor by email if he was OK with my choice of topic and save the email conversation as a PDF and attach that to my application.
Ice Swimmer
Well done and Congratulations! I hope you’re ridiculously proud of yourself. I send you my best wishes for the future with the hope that you land the job of your dreams.
Ooff
What a week
On Sunday it was #1’s birthday. she is now officially a teenager, heavens have mercy, so our friends and her BFF came to visit. On Sunday it was grandparents time. I swear, my in laws are the most exhausting people ever. The weather was a bit cloudy and our garden is a cool place, so my MIL was obviously cold.
“Do you want a cardigan?”
Nono, I’m fine.
5 Minutes later: I’m moving over here where there is more sun.
“Do you want a blanket?” (We keep a stash of fleece blankets just for that)
Nono, I’m fine
Dusk falls, no more sun…
It’s getting fresh!
“Really, you can have one of my cardigans, I have more than enough!”
Nono, I’m fine.
Now, I’ll admit that I love having guests so I can make them happy and have a good time. My MIL otoh loves to complain.
Tuesday we got a breather, on Wednesday we had friends over for dinner after going on Pokémon Go Raids. they#re people we once met by chance and noticed that we actually like spending time with each other.
Yesterday I had a house full of kids. The week before the little one had her “graduation” in primary school. She came running to me “Mum, mum, J is finally allowed to sleep over at friends’, can I have a pyjamas party?”. I, thinking we were talking about J, agreed. The little one turned around and yelled to all her friends “She said yes, pyjamas party Thursday at my place!”
This meant 4 extra kids, but they’re all good kids.
In case you’re wondering whether I turned into a Covidiot, no, I didn’t. Except for sleeping everything happened outdoors, the kids were sleeping 2 and three in big, well ventilated rooms and they spent all their time together in school anyway until last Friday. We#re also currently down to 5-10 new cases a week on a million inhabitants, though I#m afraid that will rise again as everybody goes on a holiday now….
Ice Swimmer
Well, Germany probably has about as many systems as it has universities. Our system was as follows: You discuss your topic with your professor (with an abstract). Then the professor mails that topic to the “Prüfungsamt”, the “exams office”. They send you your topic by mail and you have exactly 6 months from the moment you get the letter. The topic on your thesis must be the exact same as in that letter. My thesis had a “different” topic than the one I had been sent. My prof had misspelled Tamora Pierce as Tamara Pierce, which I hadn’t noticed, and I had put the titles of the books in italics, as it is custom. Thankfully my prof was online when they sent that mail because she wrote back within 3 minutes that it was her mistake to have misspelled the name of the author. When we next met she was like “do you know what their problem was?”, because obviously I hadn’t written a different thesis from the one I’d been assigned…
voyager
Thank you!
Giliell
Here the 6 months is a recommendation, exceeding it significantly without a good reason will lower the grade.
You’ve got quite some social life lately with both the good and the less good sides of it.
It’s been rainy here for two weeks now and I just got lucky with MUSHROOMS!
I went for a late night walk in an area where we have some remnants of spruce forest in my neighborhood. It was cool, the sky was mostly clear, a nice soft 10 PM daylight. I walked along the forest edge, tasting some semi-ripe bilberries. Then I found two stone boletes growing next to each other under spruces. They were a bit too mature already (It’s not even peak bolete season yet) and had been nibbled by slugs, but there seemed to be no maggots inside.
I didn’t have a plastic bag in my pocket (as always happens when I manage to find mushrooms) so I carried them home in my hands. Since they were so overripe, I immediately cleaned them and began making mushroom stew at 11 PM. The two mushrooms weren’t very large for their species, and I discarded some bits, but there was enough material for a nice stew.
As I returned home, the clouds were gathering. Soon, it was getting semi-dark faster than during a normal midsummer sunset. Within 30 minutes after I was indoors, it suddenly began raining *extremely* hard. A nearby weather station recorded 17 mm of rain in one hour, which is quite unusual in this area.
lumipuna
Here in the near western parts of Capital Area we had a thunderstorm last night and I think the lightning strikes were to the west but not that far.
Congrats on finding the delicious boletes.
Saw my Mom today for the first time since March 16. And I mean “saw”. We had to stay 2m apart so communication was by her talking and me writing in large letters on a pad of paper. She is OK. Still hates everything but OK. Wants a haircut.
Also the lady who rode the same bus to the care facility, her husband is not dead.
Hmmm, boletes…
+++
Chigau
Yay for seeing her again. Does she still understand what is going on? My BFFs father is suffering from dementia and he doesn’t understand what is happening and therefore just feels like people are being horrible to him for no reason.
+++
So we’re getting pets. The kids have wanted pets for a while now and Mr is a no pets please person, and we set some conditions. Guess which kid met them. Right. Not the teenager. The teenager wants a tarantula. The teenager also has unpacked boxes in her room from when we moved in three years ago. I’m not getting a pet that you’ll only ever find again by accidentally stepping on it should it ever escape or be dropped on the floor.
The little one keeps her room much tidier than we keep the rest of the house. She has jumped through any hoop her dad presented her with, and yes, he made her jump through hoops to v the c point I had to tell him to stop moving the goalposts.
She wanted mice, informed herself, found somebody to look after them should we go on a holiday. He wanted time to think about it, she gave him time. He said he needed to talk to me and I told him to give the kid an answer.
OK, he just can’t with mice. Alternatives? She said chinchillas. She looked into them and decided that they were too much for her. Which shows me that she is really doing this responsibly.
Currently we are looking into degus. We could turn my gran’s old kitchen cupboard into a nice large cage.
Giliell
My mother is 91 and still quite sharp, mentally. She knows what’s going on but the restrictions still piss her off.
Her and the rest of us. It’s not like we like living in a pandemic. But that’s still much better than being mistreated, which is of course what we’re doing to folks with dementia, even though there is no good alternative.
Re: social distancing
Last weekend, I used public transport and visited my parents’ hometown for the first time since Christmas (they visited here a few weeks ago, on their own car and without staying over). I was planning to visit them in March, but we mutually agreed to skip that at the last moment, since the epidemic was just getting started and the alarm level was rising. I was delighted at the time that my parents took it all quite seriously -- though they’re pretty much homebodies anyway.
A couple weeks later, authorities forbade all non-essential travel between Helsinki and “provincial” Finland, though the ban didn’t last for more than three weeks. The epidemic has been consistently stronger here in Helsinki area, compared to the rest of Finland. In recent weeks, there’s been only a slowly drying trickle of new cases in Helsinki area, and almost none elsewhere.
I’m slightly surprised there’s no signs of a second wave yet, despite people having lived almost normally for several weeks now. It seems like caution has been largely forgotten. My parents wanted to arrange a normal traditional family meeting (for a dozen people from around southern Finland) and I went along with it, despite it being a notable breach from my highly hermetic CoViD-era lifestyle. At least I didn’t have much risk of being a carrier when I met my family.
Yay, my contract got renewed for another year. I cannot tell you how happy I am.
Giliell, Congratulations!
Guess who was up at 5 AM? Yep, me, to put on the kettle. And since I was already up, how about some breakfast for the old tortie cat? Paul decided to get up early and do one of his day trips -- he’s driving to Ojai, where he will get takeout and find a park to sit and birdwatch. When I wake up, I’m going to work on reorganizing my little wee studio some more, I think.
Congrats, Giliell!
I think I pulled my ankle (or whatever the term is) the night before yesterday. It’s starting to get better now. Luckily, I don’t have to go much anywhere for a few days.
lumipuna
Ouch, have a speedy recovery
Anne
Have fun reorganizing. I’ll spend the afternoon shovelling dirt…
The pool has arrived and we still need to flatten the area.
++++
Folks, I’m so angry. This will be ranty, beware.
I told you before about my court certified mad cousin, right? That mad cousin has a court appointed legal guardian. That mad cousin used to have parents. His mum died a few years ago from lung cancer, his dad died in March. After his mum’s death he burned about 200.000 bucks on drugs and the went on stealing from his dad.
My sister who, has a heart the size of a planet cared for both my aunt and my uncle without ever asking for a penny. My uncle died in the hospital during the height of Covid (neither with nor from). My sister and the household caretaker made sure he had enough laundry and the caretaker did his dirty laundry. She, the caretaker, also had access to my uncle’s bank account because she did his shopping and also for things like doing the laundry, so on the day my uncle died she withdrew the final 200 bucks she was due, sealed the card in an envelope and handed it in at the bank.
Last night my mad cousin threatened my sister, demanding those 200 bucks. My sister contacted his guardian. That sorry excuse for a human being told my sister it would be easiest if she just gave him the money but do get a receipt!
I mean, I can’t blame my mad cousin, because he is mad, although I do think that maybe innocent people should not have to deal with being threatened by people who no longer have any access to reality, but that guardian? I hope my sister not only goes to the police, but also files a complaint against the guardian.
lumipuna
Ow, I hope it gets better quickly.
For some reason in relation to ankles one ‘sprains’ them, all other muscles etc are usually ‘pulled’. English and it’s daft quirks, sorry.
Giliell
Yay for the contract! What a relief for you.
Uff for yor sister, not at all nice and as for the guardian that is just appalling. Did Germany do the whole “oh we won’t lock up our mad people in those dark satanic institutions anymore, we’ll care for them in the community” thing? It sounds as if your cousin could do with more strucured care than he is getting, it really isn’t fair to your sister and anyone else who he thinks as wronged him to have him free to threaten them.
Anne
I hope the studio is now ready for action :-)
—
I’m starting to work out the pattern for an aran sweater for Paul, doing the tensions square, both in stocking stitch and in the cable pattern, at the moment. Next I have to convert the pattern I am going to use to top down (and therefore seamless), and work out details like the cables ending up going into the cable along the ede of the raglan seam rather than just petering out.
*whispers* we have sun peeping through the cloud everynow and then!
Jazzlet
re aran sweater
Look up patterns for gansey or guernsey sweater.
They are seamless but you start at the bottom, circle knit to the armpits, knit front and back separately, join at the shoulder yolk, then knit the sleeves and collar.
I’ve done both this style and top down, the gansey is easier for maintaining a pattern.
Hello hello, happy Friday (it is Friday, isn’t it)!
Studio’s mostly ready. It’s only about 10x8 feet, so it’s still crammed, but I put a lot of things away. It’s also where most of my artworks live because Paul won’t let me put my art dolls in the living room -- he says they’re too scary. Funny, he likes my Death of Rats.
Now I’m working on stuff in the bedroom closet, where a lot of my other craft supplies and projects in progress live, so I can put more things away. Am I the only person who finds project supplies from years ago and realizes I’m never going to get to that one anyway? At least I can pass all the sketchbooks to Kitty.
Oh well. Time to move laundry. Hugs to all!
Jazzlet
Yeah, and in general I’m in favour of such an approach, only that he would need a lot more structure. The problem is that as long as somebody can mitigate the disaster and he doesn’t actually physically hurt somebody, nothing will happen. I mean, he threatened to shoot up a casino and pulled a gun on a cop, he threatened people in a bank with a hammer, not to mention all the instances of domestic threats against his parents.
I miss my cousin. We grew up like siblings. I’m incredibly sad that he is the way he is now. I still never ever want to meet him in person again.
Thanks for the well wishes. Sorry for Giliell’s cousin situation.
Thanks. Tangentially related, a while ago I saw someone (a vegan with a dark sense of humor) discuss the hypothetical use of human flesh as pork substitute. I then contemplated joking about an unspecified pulled pork substitute that’d be labeled simply “pulled muscle”.
Just thought you’d like to know I’m officially in therapy.
That is all.
Kitty out.
WMDKitty — Survivor
I hope the therapy goes well.
chigau
I’m thinking about making a circular yoke now, rather than a ‘raglan’ top, so I can incorporate the increases into the pattern of cables. I will have to choose between them, but not just yet -- I do find letting ideas bubble around for at least a few days results in me making better decisions than when I just dive in, so I’m not just procrastinating. I will add your experience to the bubbling brew. I do know from the tension square that the cabling is going to be beautifully crisp.
Gilliell
Oof, that’s bad. I’m not surprised you miss the person that was, not that you don’t want to see the one that is.
lumipuna
Pulled muscle -- I like it!
—
My therapy continues, looking at thing that happened way back when with the experience and ?maturity? I have now is explaining a lot about my mental health, whether that will translate into improved mental health we will see. I talked to another of my brothers about it, he was appalled at my dad saying I couldn’t live at home when I graduated “Well that was a shitty thing to do”, yes, yes it was.
In other weather news … it’s raining again. It lead Jake to piss and shit indoors because I wasn’t paying adequate attention, but it is also leading to Paul working on getting the new kitchen sink fitted. At the moment I think he is making support framework for the sink, it’s a Belfast sink so the regular kind of sink cupboard would be useless. So some bad and some good results.
And now the power to the sockets in our extension, which includes half of the kitchen is out, of course this affects the sockets for both freezers and the fridge, we’ve got them plugged into an extension cable, but it’s a bit Heath Robinson. We’ve been trying to get an electrician to come and do several jobs with no success so I’ve no idea if we’ll be able to get someone to fix it. It’s probably due to rodents chewing on the insulation (they have done this elsewhere), butt it might be another examle of the bodging done by the previous owner -- these are the ones that didn’t bother to earth a metal light fitting among other idiocies.
Well 2020 just keeps getting better doesn’t it? :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-07-19/how-a-ghost-ship-off-yemen-is-being-used-like-a-floating-bomb/12465810
Also this online event is on, I was going to say tonight here in Oz -- on facebook but also I gather twitter:
***
-- Candlelight for refugees held hostage fb group.
***
Source & (sorry) fb event page :
https://www.facebook.com/events/s/candlelight-for-refugees-held-/265917824711576/
Good for you, WmdKitty
It’s not going to be easy, it’s hard work, but when it works, it’s damn worth it.
+++
Busy, busy, busy
Mr and I are preparing the ground for the pool, which means moving some cubic metres of dirt. While doing so we found a block made from “blue concrete”. I dunno if there’s an English word for it : very hard concrete that is blue due to the amount of cement. Used for atomic bunkers, tank breakers and apparently cornerstones of garden sheds.
It took us a full morning to remove piece by piece with the hammer drill until it was only 80kg or so and we could move it to the wheelbarrow.
But one thing I noticed again was how much I like working with Mr. We make a plan, we comunicate and then we work hand in hand. We look out for each other and therefore are able to take a hint when one of us tells the other to stop.
Yesterday we spent with our friends. We made sushi and springrolls. Saturday they’ll visit us, with Spain being the food motto, on Sunday we’re at their place again, food motto France.
@WMDKitty — Survivor, I wish you well in the therapy, hopefully, it does what it is supposed to do.
@Giliell, yay for your contract renewal, but boo-hoo for it only being one year. Does Germany not have laws against stringing fixed-term contracts behind one another?
I completely understand about your cousin. I had a similar situation with my sister, who is a compulsive liar and financially inept. She got her self into such serious financial trouble, we had to kick her out of the house because the way laws in CZ are written, all our possessions could have been confiscated if she continued to live with us. It was probably one of the hardest decisions to do in my life. Things are better now, finally. The government is starting to do something about regulating money lenders and helping people in debt (finding out that some laws during the communist era did make sense after all and that “free market” does not take care of everything) and my sister is slowly getting out of the hole she dug and can visit us again. But the hardest thing in that ordeal was trying to convince someone they should seek help when they are convinced that they do not need help, and trying to untangle a web of elaborate lies they spun to hide the real scope of their problems (to this day we do not know how big debts she had, but I did have to fend-off debt collectors after she left, so it was definitively very serious).
A rare good news story (still I hope?) about an endangered almost extinct river dwelling gastropod here :
https://www.al.com/live/2011/07/snail_recovers_from_brink_of_e.html
From Alabama of all places.
From 2011 so a long time since and any updates from anyone who know smroe here would be appreciated.
Remarkably this is a snail that gives birth tolive younbg -- I kid you not :
https://www.extinction.photo/species/elimia-laete-formerly-goniobasis-laete-tulotoma-magnifica-gyrotoma-pyramidatum/
With highlights of a short ceremony for it viewable here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lPyhejhUeI
Small remarkable, fragile cause for some hope -- even if its existence remains precarious. Hopefully of some interest for folks.
@ 34. WMDKitty — Survivor : I hope it helps and wish you all the best.
@ 40. Charly : My sympathies that’s a dreadful situation and sounds like some extremely counter-productive and unhelpful laws that need changing.
@32. Giliell : Likewise. I can only begin to imagine.
Charly
I’m glad to hear your sister is recovering. Mine isn’t the smartest person money wise either.
+++
Uff, home again. Today we made our “holiday daytrip” to the zoo in Amnéville. It was my first time in France since Covid 19 and I was interested to see if there were many differences. Well, the French are more likely to wear a mask outdoors, but also more likely to basically sit in your lap if that gives them a better view. I brought you pictures!
Hi everyone. Sorry I haven’t been around much. Jack and I are keeping busy with garden chores. We’ve spent so many summers Down East that out own yard has become a tangle of overgrown bushes and weeds. Remediation has been damned hard work and I still have lots to do. It isn’t nearly as much fun as being at the beach. At least Jack is good company and full of comic relief. I hope everyone is staying safe and well.
Chigau
I’m glad you’re able to see your mom again. My mother was also an angry person who never could find anything nice to say about anyone, especially me. She was eventually diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder, and knowing that made it a bit easier for me to spend time with her.
WMDKitty--Survivor
I send you my good wishes. Therapy is hard work, but it has incredible benefits.
Giliell
Congratulations on your renewed contract. and good luck with the new pet. Reptiles can make excellent companions.
Jazzley
Therapy for me happened in stages. There wasn’t a grand reckoning. It was more like I developed skills that helped me cope. The memories of parental abuse still exist and there’s still anger, but I learned to redefine things and change my self-talk. I can’t change what happened, and it’s all become part of who I am, so I accept it and try to live in the present. (I hope that makes some sort of sense. I don’t talk about it very often.)
StevoR
Thanks for the links.
It’s nice to get a feel-good story with the Tulotoma Snail.
voyager
Ah, yes, gardening. When we bought the house we targeted some very overgrown bushes and found that we are in possession of red currants. Mind you, the grow about 3 m from the fence where that bush was growing…
I know what you mean. There’s no undoing. There is no reckoning either. Back when I noticed that I had something to work on my mother was sinking deeper and deeper into alcoholism while my father was a text book example of co-dependence, there was no talking to them. What was important to me was that things changed. I can live with never getting a “sorry, what I did was wrong” if instead she never treats me like that again. Actions speak louder than words. And yes, i mostly learned to change patterns. Or as I once put it: she can still play the music but I don’t have to dance.
+++
I am currently pretty pissed about my dysfunctional in law family again, this time the little brother. I like the little brother, but the little brother is a spoiled, pampered brat. When I first met that family I was introduced to the Cult of M, where every second sentence started with “poor M” and ideas on how to make M’s life better. They tried to recruit me but I pretty quickly told them that no, they cannot just decide that i was going to spend 2 hours of my life and 10 l of fuel to save “poor M” some minor annoyance like having to take the train. Mind you, poor M is just 2 years younger than me, by now a doctor of biology.
Poor M called and asked Mr to help him move this weekend. Now, you’ll say, helping your little brother move is something people do, Giliell, don’t be an asshole, but fact is that this is the second move in 3 years and poor M never lifted a finger the last two times we moved. Poor M also of course asked his 72 years old dad to help him move, which was a very clever thing, because while Mr might have told him “sorry, no time” otherwise, Mr is way too worried about his dad driving those 3.5 hours alone and then hurting himself. So now Mr left this afternoon and is spending the last half week of his holiday at his brother’s while I get to deal with the unfinished work in the backyard and the preparations for the guests we had invited all along for Saturday. I also have this idea about who will pay the fuel and road toll for the round trip and it won’t be my BIL…
Heya
A good weekend was had, now there’s a sculpture of the Alps made from dirty laundry waiting in the cellar.
But first I’ll do the grocery run and snap some flower pics.
We’re under a HEAT WARNING.
30°C tomorrow.
chigau
I hope you are able to stay reasonably cool.
Gilleill
I am hoping that my Pennine laundry installation will be reduced as we are forecast several days of dry weather with light winds so I should be able to dry it all outside on my newish whirligig.
___
I had chosen to forget a lot of the things that my parents did and didn’t do, now that I have started all sorts of things are coming back. I was reminded by an article in the Guardian that my mother chose to keep both her cancer diagnosis, and later when she couldn’t conceal the diagnosis or initial treatment -- the lack of a breast being somewhat noticable -- the continued progression of the disease secret from most of her children. She couldn’t hide it from my younger brother as he was still at home for the start of it all. But I only found out that the cancer had metastasied all over from the doctor when she was admitted to hospital after a stoke on the first day of the holiday we had gone on. She thought she was “not worrying the children”, whereas not knowing how she really was meant we all still worried, but weren’t at all prepared for the fact that she was dying. It still makes me angry to think of it, angry and hurt. I don’t think either of my parents had good people skills.
Jazzlet,
I’m sorry that you went through that. It would leave me feeling angry and resentful, too. As if I’d been lied to and my parents were still trying to make decisions for me.
I went through a period of time in my early forties when a lot of painful memories surfaced. I think I was at a point in life where I felt stable and safe and ready to remember. It made dealing with my parents very difficult at times because I had a lot of anger and I couldn’t express it to them, knowing they would be dismissive or gaslight me. It sounds silly, but I used to play things over in my head, only with my adult self present to help support the little me and give her a voice.
I had very few memories of my childhood and one of the nicer things about that time of my life was that I also remembered a few good things that were buried with the crappy stuff.
@ chigau (違う) : Here in Adelaide, South Oz we’ve just had the driest July since 1920 so I gather.
Trio of rather amazing science liks hopefully of interest 26 marvellous new micromolluscs found :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-08-01/researchers-discover-new-species-of-micromolluscs-off-kimberley/12495892
New Tunguska discovery may be a crater and at leats partial answer to what happened there in 1908 :
https://www.space.com/3996-crater-solve-1908-tunguska-meteor-mystery.html
An incredible revival of microscopic creatures from before the KT mass extinction event and 5.7 km beneath the waves :
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-07-29/scientists-revive-100-million-year-old-bacteria-under-seafloor/12501526
I must admit when I heard the news about the revival of the ancient bacteria my initial reaction was “Noooo! Have they never watched a horror movie about ancient things being revived?” But it is jolly cool really.
Is there a place where you can complain if the promised thunderstorm doesn’t arrive? Also this oppressively humid weather makes my monthly migraine just worse.
Jazzle and voyager
Back when I started to deal with all that had happened I was so, so glad to have my sister to confirm that yes, she did that, yes, that happened. One notable instant was when I told my mother on the phone that it hurt me that often when we had a conflict she would just give me the silent treatment at times for days and only speak to me again if I apologised for being such a horrible person (as if a child has any choice but to do so) and she said “I never did that” and hung up. At that point I was far enough along that I just started laughing.
+++
And speaking of mothers and shit and 2020being a shitshow: It looks like my mother is “coping” by turning to her good old friend alcohol again…
Giliell
Oh dear :-/
So. The Heat Warning is off. But it is still 29°C in my apartment.
I have ordered a fan.
It cooled down somewhat here, but the promised rain never arrived, so we’re in for another drought year with my state holding the record for being the driest one.
Giliell,
I’m sorry to hear that. I know that her decision will impact your life, and test your coping skills.
Chigau,
I hope the fan arrives quickly.
It’s cooled down where I am, into the low 20’s. It’s been nice. We’ve also had lots of rain over the past few days, which was needed. It’s been quite dry here, as well.
Darkness is peering over my shoulder, constantly. Despite the sunny weather, despite me trying to keep as busy as possible. I am keeping it at bay, but I feel its presence and it is sapping me of whatever little strength I possess.
Charly
I am so sorry, I wish I could banish the darkness, it is so exhausting fighting against it, I am not surprised it is sapping your strength. Could you get any help with it?
It’s been two years. Unbelievable.
Charly
*hugs*
Chigau
Yes. Some days I still can’t believe it.
+++
I just “got” our degus. We will get them when they’re old enough, a group of three little degu girls. I think Caine would have been thrilled to hear about them and get to know them.
Charly, my warm thoughts!
Chigau and Giliell, there being a gap in the world is the only way I can understand it on emotional level. In the dreams I’ve seen and have remembered, dead people I’ve known have never been dead.
Ed Brayton :
https://www.patheos.com/blogs/dispatches/2020/08/10/saying-goodbye-for-the-last-time/
In case people hadn’t already heard. He was a good human being and made the world much better by being in it with a blog & community there that also (like this one) taught me a lto and gave me another chance. I willalways be grateful for him and his work and words and actions. I will miss him a lot.
^ lot.
-- Ed Brayton.
See #64.
Fuck cancer, fuck death, fuck 2020. Fuck. Just fuck.
Ice Swimmer
“A gap in the world “ perfectly describes what I’m feeling. Thanks.
Charly,
I’m sorry that you’re struggling. I wish I could offer more than just an e-hug. Have you any supports or a Dr. To assess your situation?
Giliell
Lots of pictures will be required once your new pets are home.
This One Incredible Trick Will Make Your Surgical Mask Somewhat More Airtight And Also Mildly Funny Looking:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TTg53aAP8Q&feature=youtu.be
I have birthday today. Sigh. I was born on Friday 13th and in my current mood, I think my life looks the part.
Charly -- congrats for at least surviving thus far? Sympathies.
Regarding the video I linked above,
Upon further testing, I find this mask fitting method gives me only a marginal improvement on airtightness, so it’s not really worth the hassle. It might be so because my fit with glasses on is already reasonably good. Without glasses, the trick doesn’t really work either.
There’s been a modest uptick of coronavirus infections in Finland, and authorities have begun cautiously introducing masking recommendations, mainly for public transport. Stores have suddenly nearly run out of masks, after people were scoffing at them just weeks ago and manufacturers were winding down production. My university is postponing reopening, which was supposed to take place next Monday.
I almost never use public transport these days, but I usually wear a disposable mask (the same bog-standard model as shown on the video) in grocery store, largely because I find it helps me to not touch my face. I’d like to use reusable cloth masks but it seems difficult to get a decent fit with those. In early summer, I bought one piece of a factory-made cotton mask just to try it on. It feels relatively warm, which might make it more comfortable than a paper mask once the weather gets cold. OTOH, it gets soggy from my breath quite easily, and I’d have to engineer it with some sort of nose clip to make the upper edge fit properly.
Those last few verses, the sledgehammer blow ending, that musical, emotional, punch to the guts.
75 years ago. Nazis lost. Now? We have to beat them again (No punctuation at end of sentence there deliberate.)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeVOzaDBEmc
Also expletives. Lots and lots of expletives and shock and disgust and horror and disappontment and also determination and hope and resolve.
Beat em before. We”ll beat em again.
At great cost and with great needless pain, suffering and unnecessary deaths of good people who could contribute to others lives & the world better and have potential for so much more. Who sacrifice unwillingly yet choose to do so because they have to avoid worse and make better possible. But do we really have to do that yet again this century after all that’s come before?
Its contradictory, powerful but in the end this song refutes itself -- if we make sure that it does once again..
75 years ago. It took 100 million ppl from 30 nations, 6 years & cost 70-85 million lives to defeat Fascism last time. This time?
Figures rounded from the (most?) common source of shared knowledge :
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_War_II
This time how many lives, how much harm done?
How can it be 2020 and nazis are still a thing in the world? How can itbe that we have (mis-)govts full of them and worse?
Nota bene (NB “note well”). WWII ended the German empire, it destroyed the short lived sadistic Japanese Empire in the most horrific way -- and, let’s note, it also ended the British empire too.
But imagine if it hadn’t been necessary. Imagine if those that had died and had their lives ruined, those who had been physically and pyschologically maimed and left in agony therest oftheir live shadn’;t been somutilated? Where we would we be now? What couldthey have dne? How much could they haev contributed and helped us all?
Barring access to alternative cosmii (plural form?) guess we’ll never know.
***
Now for something totally different a critically endangered if awesome and quirklily goofy cute little creature (individuals thereof) eating and ramming a papaya .. Becoz palate cleansers needed :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMkvdFDucYA
Species info :
https://www.ecologyasia.com/verts/turtles/elongated-tortoise.htm?fbclid=IwAR3BkeIq7TyQEFVFOVUaox1b-meEajOKZrhYRxClfvDDD2Le1GILgwDF9xo
Plus a good article on them here :
https://www.thehindu.com/sci-tech/science/sal-forest-tortoise-habitat-stretches-over-unprotected-areas/article31544837.ece
Hope y’all find worthwhile.
PS. Of course all empires tend to be sadistic by nature. The Japanese one of WWII sure wasn’t unique in that and apologies if my previous comment didn;t make that clear.
People are people. Countries are countries. Individuals are individuals. I’m tired drunk and all f’d up.