If your opponent goes low, you should either respond in kind, or stake out a position from which you arguably look superior. Let’s get a case study from Joe Biden on how to do that wrong.
Remember, Joe Biden is supposed to be the democrats’ answer to Trump: he’s going to get right down in the mud and manure with him, pull his ridiculous coiffure of toxic masculinity with one red-blooded American fist, while squeezing his nut-sack with the other, until he cries for his lawyer. Or something like that. It’s stupid, of course, but it’s how Americans seem to want their politics, nowadays. Perhaps that’s not it – perhaps the media (and democrats) think that’s what Americans want because, after all, if Trump is a crass mobbed-up asshole, and he got elected, then half or so of the electorate wants President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho.
I hated Idiocracy because the movie accidentally, itself, represented American ignorance about eugenics. But it does seem like it’s a bit of a documentary. It does make me wonder whether there’s some sort of genetic damage diluting our precious bodily fluids – perhaps it’s something in the paint they use in the McMansions in Montauk?
None of that could have affected Biden because, like most of the US gerontocracy, he’s genetically closer to the humans that came out of Kenya, by a couple of generations at least. Biden’s a guy who grew up when “fiddlesticks” was harsh language, indeed. The same can be said for Trump (and Pelosi) – which is probably why Trump feels sly and edgy when he calls his political opponents names. Can you imagine Genghis Khan doing that?
Here’s a hint for Trump and Biden and the rest: weak bullies talk about the other guy. Ghenghis Khan would not call you “poopy drawers” he’d come over with something along the lines of:
I am the poopy drawers of GOD come to rule over you. Drape me over your face and breathe deep of me, for this is what your eternity will smell like.
It’s sad that a lowly blogger like myself has to try to teach these baby tough guys how it’s done. I used to sit there gnawing my knuckles with rage when Hillary “We came, we saw, he died” Clinton sat there and took it instead of turning to Trump with a (forced) silvery laugh, “‘Crooked Hillary’? Is that the best you can do, tough guy? Are you ever going to stop projecting your inadequacy on others?” #SAD.
The Daily Beast reports this performance from Biden: [beast]
Joe Biden Gives Trump Nickname ‘Clown’
Former Vice President Joe Biden told a South Carolina campaign rally crowd on Saturday night that he had a lot of names he could call the president, but he would start with “clown.” Biden, on a two-day swing through the state, then mistakenly referred to Margaret Thatcher as the U.K. prime minister as he tried to boast about his knowledge of foreign leaders. Thatcher led the U.K from 1979 to 1990. “One I can say is Margaret Thatcher, um, excuse me, Margaret Thatcher – Freudian slip,” Biden said, according to Politico. “But I knew her too. The prime minister of Great Britain, Theresa May.” Going back to Trump, who refers to Biden as ‘Sleepy Joe,’ he said he would not stoop to the level of the president’s name calling. “On every single issue and on every demeaning thing he says about other people, I have no problem responding directly,” Biden said. “What I’m not going to do is get into what he wants me to do. He wants this to be a mud wrestling match.”
Joe, you sad, sad, man. First off, you didn’t even call Trump a “clown” – you said you’d call him a “clown” if you called him a “clown.” Apparently you want to have your cake and eat it too: you want to be a tough guy who calls Trump a “clown” but you want to simultaneously be above all that name-calling. Except you then wrap up by saying, in effect,”I’m above all that name-calling but it he wants name-calling then look out because I’m a real toughie.”
I have tougher cookies in my cookie-jar than Joe Biden, but that’s because they’re old and dried up. I also don’t think it was a great strategic move for Biden to remind us that he was a friend of Benjamin Disraeli and that Talleyrand was “just doing his job.” [And PS to democrats who were complaining about how McCain put Sarah Palin “within a few heartbeats of the white house” but are now promoting Biden: you are why you lose]
The sad thing is that there are democrats who want Biden to run because they feel that he’ll be able to go toe-to-toe with Trump. The guy is – literally – not even worth talking to. He’s incoherent; it’s like talking to someone whose brain is dissolving from tertiary syphillis, except he does not inspire sympathy. “I’ll argue with Trump after he’s shown that he can string a few sentences together into something coherent – maybe by doing something like giving Congressional testimony about his attempts to interfere with the Mueller investigation, or explaining his taxes to the public. In the meantime he’s not worth talking to – his great political innovation is calling other heads of state things like ‘Rocket Man’ – of course he wants to get into a name-calling contest: that’s all he’s got. You can see how well his ‘diplomacy’ works, it’s as bad as his ‘restauranteur’ and ‘airline magnate’ and maybe ‘husband’ and ‘father.'”
What a completely lame performance. They way to show you’re a tough guy and enough of a nihilist to call the president names is to conjure up the sight of two old men stomping on each other in a mud puddle while the Secret Service stands by with towels and refreshments for afterward. It ain’t Valhalla Rising.
Now, go away or I shall taunt you a second time-ah.
It’s not sure if he really said it this way, but this is how Ghengis Khan justified a clampdown:
O people, know that you have committed great sins, and that the great ones among you have committed these sins. If you ask me what proof I have for these words, I say it is because I am the punishment of God. If you had not committed great sins, God would not have sent a punishment like me upon you.
I have been watching The Expanse lately (it’s OK) and have been impressed as hell by the vivid performance given by Shoreh Aghdashloo as Chrisjen. She should hire herself out as an acting coach to politicians.
I would like to bring back “beyond basic” sentence structure for politicians. That is my request. Let’s get sentences that are things of beauty, please, not powerpoint bullets.