Thursday morning I am going to be admitted to a treatment center in Chicago to get help for my eating disorder. I don’t know how long I will be there.
I’m going to have to slow down a little bit.
However, I am taking a bunch of journals and I plan on filling them up. I’ve already written quite a bit about this experience so far. I’ve been to hell and back in the last few weeks and I’ve documented every fucking minute of it. Every time the shit hits the fan I think, “maybe this will be a great book one day!” Then it’s like I can step outside of myself and just observe. I don’t know if any of that is healthy but it seems to be getting me through.
I am taking my Chromebook with me and I plan on blogging when I can. It just probably won’t be as frequent.
Happy holidays! I’m off to kick some eating disorder ass!
Good luck. Thank you for your bravery in talking about this, and take care of yourself.
Sorry you’re having to deal with this just before / during the holidays. Hope they can help you get better.
Not to make light of your eating disorder, but I can’t help thinking about the movie “Airplane!” and the protagonist’s “drinking problem”. If only it were as simple as getting the food into your mouth accurately, eh?
The news here tonight covered the case of a teenage boy who’s dealing with a condition called EOE, which apparently involves the esophagus having an allergic reaction to certain foods or food ingredients. He’s doing better since the diagnosis. Maybe they’ll find a treatable cause of your issues too.
May you succeed. Best wishes.
Take good care of yourself and remember how many people care about you. Please check in when you can and keep us informed about your progress. Sending my best wishes for a strong, healthy recovery.
Wishing you all the success in your journey to good health. As for this:
Every time the shit hits the fan I think, “maybe this will be a great book one day!” Then it’s like I can step outside of myself and just observe. I don’t know if any of that is healthy but it seems to be getting me through.
FWIW, I think it is quite healthy, and my therapist would most certainly agree. That ability to “step outside [your]self and just observe” can be an extraordinarily powerful tool. It’s also very much in alignment with various forms of meditation (therapeutic and otherwise), and with the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model of therapy, which you might find helpful and/or interesting to look into.
I’ll be thinking of you. Big (safe) hugz, if you want ’em.