Grandma was “set in her ways”.

Is being “set in your ways” ever a good enough excuse? Is it best to leave older generations be?

I have a family member who is gay and came out a little over ten years ago. She was nervous and she said she would be okay if our elderly grandma never found out. 

Grandma was conservative — definitely from a different time. She was often racist and sexist. Horrible shit would just fly out of her mouth with absolutely no remorse.  While I had never really heard her say anything homophobic, I feared her reaction. 

Spoiler alert — grandma found out. It was bad but it could have been a lot worse. 

My family member was brave. Grandma died a few years ago and I never told her I’m an atheist or even that I’m not a Christian.

I’m sure lots of people feel like we did — maybe it’s best not to let older generations completely into your personal life. After all, they’re “set in their ways”. 

Do you think this is okay? Better question — who here have grandparents that know they’re an atheist or freethinker?

Far from Home

A few days ago I posted about atheists in rural areas and shared a little about my childhood in the country. I currently live in Toledo which really isn’t that far from home, but right now it feels like I grew up on another planet.

My high school classmates have been posting over the past couple of days on Facebook about our 20-year reunion. I can’t believe it’s been twenty years since we graduated high school. I doubt I’ll attend even though my dad told me the 20-year reunion is way more interesting than the 10-year.

What is completely blowing my mind is that the conversation on Facebook has of course turned to our children. The majority of my classmates now have kids in high school and college. My daughter is in preschool! I thought I’d be a smart ass and ask if anyone is a grandparent yet but I refrained. I probably already know the answer.

Just for reference or if you’re like me and don’t like math — I’m only 38.

I’m not saying there’s really anything wrong with having babies when you’re in your twenties, but I can’t believe so many of them did. Some of them were even younger.

To top the weekend off there was a hate crime against a gay teenager near my hometown. It’s absolutely disgusting. My heart goes out to any kids that are “different” growing up back home. I know it can be really hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Sometimes I wonder what it’s like to live back home right now, but I can see it’s not worth the time or energy. I made the right choice in leaving.

Back to Work!

I have some exciting news! I’m going back to work!

Prior to the pandemic, I worked part-time facilitating art, writing, and music groups for people struggling with homelessness as well as mental health and addiction issues. While I don’t always agree with the larger organization I’m a part of, working with the participants has always been a rewarding experience. The arts have played a huge part in my own recovery and getting paid to share my passions is amazing! I am quite literally working at my dream job.

There’s a core group of people that used to come to the arts space and I miss them terribly. We text but it’s just not enough. The atmosphere at the arts space was magical when we were all creating together and it’s clear that we are all in need of that right now.

I have remained employed and paid over the past year but there wasn’t a lot of work for me to do. People higher up in the organization found things for me to do here and there but it definitely wasn’t the same.

Next week I will be facilitating my first in-person group since the pandemic! It’s going to be an art group for kids. It’s been fun buying supplies and my daughter is excited because she’s going to come to work with me and help with the group! I’m thinking sidewalk chalk if it’s nice out!

While this is all very exciting to me, it is, unfortunately, the only group planned at the moment. I don’t want to rush anything — I want everyone to feel safe in the groups — but I am definitely getting antsy. Fingers crossed the situation keeps improving!

Atheists from Rural Areas?

I love my life here in Toledo. I love the people, the opportunities, and the shit ton of restaurants and stores. I’m happy to be raising my daughter in an urban setting. She’s going to meet lots of different people and try lots of different things.

Our house seems to be close to everything and we’re a little spoiled.

But my life actually began far from city limits. You may never guess that if you look at my current situation, but then I open my mouth. Ah yes, there’s that twang. I was once a country girl.

Is anyone else here from a rural area?

Why are rural areas usually conservative? Lack of diversity? Isolation?

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to live there now. Have things changed?

I spent my entire childhood in the country. I headed to the city for college when I was eighteen and never looked back. Internet was still dial-up back then. Surely things have gotten more progressive by now, right?

I’d love to hear from some of you living in rural areas. How do you deal?

Today my husband and I visited these gigantic corn statues. They’re in Dublin, Ohio — about two hours from Toledo. I thought the photos were fitting for the post. 🙂

Atheist = Good?

Long time no see!

I apologize for the lack of posting this past week. I have been hung up with a nasty sinus infection and haven’t felt like doing much of anything. Today is day number three on antibiotics and I’m starting to feel human again.

This post won’t be long but I do have a question lingering on my mind:

Do you equate “atheist” with good morals? Just like when someone says a “good Christian” man with “good Christian” values? Not that I’ve ever heard anyone describe anything as “good atheist”. I don’t know if I necessarily associate “atheist” with good but I know as soon as someone says “good Christian” I automatically assume the opposite. 

This question makes me think of this sleazy car mechanic my husband and I, unfortunately, did business with a few years back. The guy gave us a long-winded speech about being a god-fearing man from a good Christian family and then boy did he really screw us.

Sometimes I think when people add that “good Christian” label it’s like they have to prove they’re good. I’m an atheist and for the most part a good human but I really don’t think I have to prove that to anyone. 

What do you think? Do you think the term “atheist” is linked with good morals? Do you think when someone says “good Christian” you should run the other way? Do you feel you have to prove you’re good? Fun stories welcome. 🙂 

Thank you! Our Mothers Day Fundraiser Was a Success!

Thank you so much to everyone who got involved or donated to Freethought Blogs’ Mothers Day Fundraiser! It was a huge success!

Our donations totaled $7349.04!

Thank you for your continued support!

Some of our bloggers will be streaming live today to say thank you. Check it out! It will be at 3:30pm Eastern Time. (Edit: This is at 19:30 UTC. I apologize for only putting an American time. I hope this helps!)

Speaking Engagements — Can I Finally Relax?

Last night I had a speaking engagement with Cleveland Humanist Alliance. I had a really great time and it was so nice to meet freethinkers from my home state of Ohio! 

This whole process of having my poetry book published and now promoting it has really been quite the journey. I’m a pretty shy and anxious person so I never envisioned myself doing so many speaking engagements. I’m normally a nervous wreck on the day of an event but yesterday felt a little different. I was totally nervous but not to the same degree. Have I finally been doing this long enough that I can relax? Probably not but it’s getting a tiny bit easier. 

Even though I was a little more relaxed, last night was difficult. I’ve been sick recently. I had a fever last weekend. I have a cough and my sinuses are killing me. (FYI I’m fully vaccinated so I don’t think it’s covid.) I was just hoping I could make it through. Reading all those poems was tough. I was drinking lots of tea and blowing my nose throughout the presentation. But even with all that, I still think I did a good job.

All of the groups I have spoken to have been extremely welcoming. I’ve met many nice people and even with all the nerves, the presentations have been worth it. I like the discussions we have and it kind of makes me miss spending time with family and friends. I spend a lot of time alone and I normally like it that way but could I actually be craving a little social interaction? 

One thing that happened last night that was completely unexpected was the host shared her screen and showed everyone my Valentine’s Day video. Towards the end of my presentations, I always talk about other projects I’m working on. I mention the erotic poetry book and tell people if they’re curious about it, go to my blog and watch the video posted on Valentine’s Day. I thought I was going to pee my pants. I’m proud of that video but it was a little embarrassing listening to my erotic poetry after having read from Free to Roam: Poems from a Heathen Mommy. 

If you haven’t seen the video, I’m posting it below. In it, I read three poems from my erotic poetry book. This video is not safe for work or kids.

The speaking engagement I did last night was the last one I have planned right now, but I will be contacting more groups and hope to do more events soon. If you are in a group and up for a little secular poetry, contact me! I would love to speak to your group. 

Bye for now!

My poetry book, Free to Roam: Poems from a Heathen Mommy, gives an atheist perspective on being a Midwest Mom. It is for sale on my publisher’s site, Barnes & Noble, and Amazon. (Signed copies are available at

FtB Mothers Day Anthology: One Anxious Mother

One Anxious Mother


three in the morning.
My heavy responsibility
barely weighs thirty pounds.
A resilient little girl
in pink leggings and dirt,
one little life
so fragile.
My stomach drops —
I can’t always protect her.
That sinking feeling
digs deeper in the middle of the night.
Nightmares of how I can lose her
on replay —
She’s drowning
and I can’t reach her.
She falls
and I’m too far away.
My worries
are a constant undercurrent.
There’s no escape.
She’s sleeping safe and sound —
I should be, too.

Poem from My Book — “Baptism”

Happy Thursday! Just sharing another poem from Free to Roam: Poems from a Heathen Mommy.

Be sure to check out Freethought Blogs this weekend for our Mothers Day fundraiser.



Every innocent baby
is born tainted
new to the world
but on a direct path to Hell.

A cold splash of submission
followed by pictures and cake
saves their blank slate souls
and fulfills a family’s societal duty.

The child has been marked
for indoctrination, brainwashing,
and conformity—
a fresh young mind donning chains and shackles.

Water should just be water
in a meaningless ceremony
but it becomes a deadly weapon
recruiting for a dangerous army.

Let the well dry up
Let the children go free
Let’s defeat the army
that has imprisoned us all.


My poetry book gives an atheist perspective on being a Midwest Mom. It is for sale on my publisher’s site freethoughthouse.comBarnes & Noble, and Amazon. (Signed copies are available at