Less of Ho Ho and More of Hell!

Dave Daubenmire has figured out what christmas hath wrought – people aren’t properly terrified anymore! This is awful, it should be a time of psychogod fear, none of this wimpy little baby nonsense, which tends to make people go “awww” instead of falling to their knees in abject terror. After all, the porno store and the slut store are celebrating christmas, they have decorations! The horror of it all, I tell ya.

…It is not the paganism that is undermining the Gospel, although it is, but rather the incomplete story of the birth of Christ. Christ came to save us from our sins

This all came to a head last Sunday when I drove by our local porn shop only to discover that the building was covered with Christmas decorations…including reindeer on the front lawn. Immediately the thought popped into my head “the light came into the world but the darkness perceived it not.” There is something seriously wrong when the porn shop is joining in the celebration of the birth of the One who came to destroy sin.

How could both the church and the porno shop be celebrating the same thing? Simple. The American Church no longer teaches that we are to fear the Lord.

Statistics show that young Americans are leaving the church in droves. The more we strive to make Christianity more relevant the more decadent the culture becomes. Where have we gone wrong I found myself thinking as I drove past the slut shop all decorated in “gay apparel?”

Um, is the porno store the same as the slut shop? Enquiring minds want to know, Dave. Why shouldn’t it (or they) celebrate a Very Merry? How do you know they are specifically celebrating “the birth of the One”? Did you go in and ask? Lots of people celebrate the solstice, and they have every right to do so. I have pointed out, too many times, that your little babe was not born on Dec. 25th. Other gods were, so perhaps they are celebrating those births, who knows? Anyroad, you don’t have a lock on this holiday. You know it has pagan roots, you don’t care, you like it anyway. You don’t care about the commercialism, you like it anyway. Oh, those are bad, “but that is not what is destroying Christianity in America.”

Suddenly, it hit me. The Babe wrapped in swaddling clothes.

That is the first image we place in the minds of our children when we introduce them to the King of Kings. From their earliest days we inculcate our children with the image of the Savior of the World as a Babe lying in a manger. When was the last time you ever heard of someone being afraid of a baby in a crib?

Looking for a clue I reread the popular manger story found in Luke and I was stunned by what leaped off of the page at me.

And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.

Looking for a clue? Don’t you assholes rant on and on and on about reading the bible all the time? You just now thought to read up a bit?

The Glory of the Lord MADE THEM AFRAID!! Despite what the Christmas Carols tell us, it wasn’t a Silent Night, Holy Night. All wasn’t calm and all wasn’t bright. The appearance of the King of Kings brought great fear to the Shepherds.

Um, yeah, why are you getting your beliefs from carols?


Permit this synopsis. From the moment Jesus was born in that manger the forces of darkness, led by King Herod, set forth to kill the Christ Child. So real was the threat that an angel warned Joseph to flee to Egypt. When Herod could not find the location of the child he sent forth his soldiers to slaughter every male child under the age of two. Matthew records:

“In Rama was there a voice heard, lamentation, and weeping, and great mourning, Rachel weeping for her children, and would not be comforted, because they are not.”

The kingdom of darkness responded to the birth of the King with unspeakable death, lamentation, weeping, and mourning. The battle for the souls of man began in a barn.

What if that was the Christmas messaging that America Christians taught their children? What if we spoke less of Ho Ho and more of hell? What if we taught them that the battle between the two seeds was a violent one and that the followers of the Babe Wrapped in Swaddling Clothes should be prepared to fight to the death for the advancement of the Kingdom of Light?

Oh yes, what expresses christianity more than terrified children? Absolutely, tell them they will have fight to the death! Absolutely, tell them they will always disappoint psychogod, because sinner, and if they set one foot wrong, it’s horrible agony and torment, forever. Yeah, a sure fire recipe for sprogs who feel loved and secure.


Like it or not the history since His birth has been filled with violence and death.

Ya don’t say, Dave. Hate to break this to you, but there was violence and death long before this nonsense started up. I will give you christians credit for seriously upping the violence and death. Can’t ever get enough of it.

For most American Christians Jesus is still lying in a manger. No wonder the porn shop celebrates Christmas.

Jesus is coming back and once again death will be following him. He is returning as a Warrior King… and he won’t be wearing a diaper.

Ho! Ho! Ho! You won’t find that message coming down your chimney.

I sincerely hope not. Who in their right mind wants a god of blood, torture, and death?  You all can revel in torture, death, hell, and all manner of psychogod nastiness, but I think you’ll have to leave most people out of it, like me. And the porno store people. And the slut shop people. We’ll stick with being kind and cheerful, and trying to make peoples’ lives a little nicer. You can go to hell on your own.

Via BarbWire.


  1. chigau (違う) says

    …reindeer on the front lawn…
    I don’t grok what reindeer were doing at Bethlehem.
    Did they take a wrong turn after they got off the Ark?

  2. lumipuna says

    Chigau: Once as a kid, I listened to a children’s Christmas sermon where the pastor tried to explain us what the Christmas tree (in Finnish “Yule spruce”) has to do with Jesus. It was some fable-ish story involving adult Jesus on his travels in Galilee, or wherever he’s supposed to have traveled about.

    It did not occur to me then that this story still didn’t connect to the birth of Jesus, the supposed theme of Christmas celebration. Instead, I was extremely skeptical of the idea of spruce trees growing in Palestine. Granted, this was based on my vague stereotypes rather than actual knowledge of Palestinian vegetation.

    (As it turns out, there’s indeed no native spruce in Levant, although there’s pine and cypress, and in the mountains of Lebanon also fir and cedar.)

  3. kestrel says

    OK, what?! First we’re all supposed to say “merry christmas” whether we want to or not, and now this guy is mad because someone is decorating for christmas? And it sounds like he’s totally trying to take every last bit of “merry” out of there and turn it to “terrifying”. Well isn’t that just lovely for the kiddos.

    You just can’t make these people happy. Doesn’t matter what you do.

  4. busterggi says

    “our local porn shop only to discover that the building was covered with Christmas decorations…including reindeer on the front lawn.”

    And if they didn’t he’d be bitching that they weren’t celebrating Christmas.

    I do like how he took partial ownership of the store, sounds like he does business there at least when no one is looking.

  5. lumipuna says

    “Mr. Trump tells you to have a merry Christmas, and it will fucking merry whether you like it or not”

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