Wayne Allen Root, in his latest attempt to defend the endless and mind numbing corruption on the part of the Tiny Tyrant, unleashed an incredibly immature rant against Robert Mueller. The arrested development seen in so many conservatives is rather fascinating, and the older they become, the more they regress. I can’t imagine such a rant having the slightest effect on me, being 60 years old, it’s barely worth an eye roll. I expect if Mr. Mueller was aware of it, the reaction would be the same. Someone should perhaps inform Mr. Root that such rants tend to reveal a great deal more about the ranter than anyone else.

“Robert Mueller has probably never had sex in his life,” Root said. “I know he has never had sex with a beautiful woman. Did you ever see the angry look on Robert Mueller’s face? Robert Mueller needs sex badly and he is so jealous that Donald Trump was a billionaire playboy and obviously had sex with the most beautiful women in the world.”

Hmm. Mr. Mueller is married with two children. As for the Tiny Tyrant, well, a long history of sexual assault, and a descriptor of average from a porn star. Not exactly  bragging material.

“Robert Mueller has penis envy,” he continued. “This is so obvious. This was high school, guys. In high school, there were handsome guys, and then there were handsome guys who were jocks, and then there were handsome guys who were jocks and had rich fathers. And that is Donald Trump. And then all the little nerds like Robert Mueller, who had never had sex in their whole lives, they hated the jocks, they hated the handsome guys, and they really hated the jocks who were handsome guys who were rich. This guy, Muller, has never had sex with a beautiful woman, so he hates Trump with a passion.”

I’ve noticed that Mr. Root often talks about high school. About time you got the fuck over it,  no? Mr. Mueller has a job to do, and I don’t recall him expressing personal feelings about people at all. That would be called professionalism.

“The greatest president in modern history, a man is trying to take him down who is a pervert,” Root added. “Robert Mueller is a pervert. He probably sits home and watches porn. He has probably never had a girl in his whole life, a beautiful woman, so he sits and watches images and then he realizes there is someone like Donald Trump who is living every man’s fantasy … [Mueller] doesn’t even know what sex feels like. Robert Mueller is an ugly lawyer, he’s got nothing going for him.”

Jesus Christ, most 5 year olds are more mature than you are, Mr. Root. The greatest president? Hahahahaha, no. The greatest crook, perhaps.

“Mueller is a little pervert,” Root continued to rant. “Mueller is vicious, Mueller is disgusting, Mueller is a pervert. Can you imagine what he does at home at night? Who knows what he does, watching his computer images of Donald Trump and beautiful women. I can just guess what Mueller is doing in the dark, with the light of the screen glaring on him inside is office at 12 midnight. Quote me, Robert Mueller: You’re a pervert, you’re a loser, you’re ugly, you have never had a beautiful women in your life and you’re jealous of Donald Trump. It is all so clear now.”

I can pretty much guarantee you that whatever Mr. Mueller does in the evenings, it has nothing to do with watching the Tiny Tyrant and women. You, on the other hand, Mr. Root, that I can envision.

“It’s penis envy,” Root declared triumphantly. “Mueller’s is smaller than Trump’s.”

Who is the official penis inspector, and when is the report coming out?

RWW has the story, such as it is.