Hey, Better Than Pharaoh!

Screengrab. Man looks like he was unwrapped after a a few decades of mummification. Yeah, I know, but still…

Here’s a somewhat novel defense of the Tiny Tyrant – he’s better than Pharaoh. Yep. Naturally, the first question springs to mind: um, which Pharaoh would we be talking about? There were a bunch of them.

“Throughout biblical history, God continually raises up imperfect leaders,” he said. “In the days of the Pharaoh of Egypt—let’s not be Pollyannish here—anything that is inappropriate for young children, it was far worse in the king of Babylon’s time and the Pharaoh. When they partied, they partied and they didn’t even have an X-rated label because anything went.”

Uhhh, X-rated kinda means anything goes, and that’s not even touching on the absolute idiocy of trying to paste that over various Egyptian dynasties. I don’t think it a terribly wise focus either, given the Tiny Tyrant’s penchant for nasty partying. All throughout history, pretty much  everything was worse for children, so I’m afraid that’s not much of a winner either. This is also a display of complete ignorance about Egyptian history, which in many aspects, was highly civilised, with a whole lot of very smart people running things.

“Donald Trump, like so many other leaders in the Old Testament, was raised up by God not because he was perfect,” McGuire added. “Other men in the Bible were pagan kings, in fact, they made the people worship them as gods. God has a historical record from Genesis to Revelation, over and over again, God says in his word, ‘Thus saith the Lord.’ He chooses who he will raise up and put down.”

Monarchy, regardless of where it’s taken place, has always been considered to be of divine origin and choice. Nothing new there. The ancient Egyptians had gods, you know, and they took them pretty damn seriously. Just like you do. That means god[s] first, monarch second. Most monarchs were quite smart enough to play up their various god[s], and simply relied on their authority as ruler to keep people in obeisance, and being fodder for wars often fought over…god[s]. “Thus saith the lord”. Yeah, there was a lot of that, and a lot of what Jehovah said was hideous, psychopathic bullshit. So fucking what? I could walk around every day saying “Thus saith Caine”, and writing “Thus saith Caine”. Wouldn’t mean a thing, except perhaps as an announcement I had decided to be an obnoxious ass.

“He put Trump into office for a reprieve,” he continued, “because our Founding Fathers, the pilgrims and Puritans, entered into a holy covenant with Almighty God, based on Deuteronomy 28. It’s an everlasting covenant. That’s why America is great. So here we have a man, a billionaire, and they don’t like him because they can’t control him. He isn’t a lapdog for Pharaoh’s new world order.”

Oh FFS, what a stew of crap. Yeah, Deuteronomy 28 is interesting. 28:14 begins:

And thou shalt not go aside from any of the words which I command thee this day, to the right hand, or to the left, to go after other gods to serve them. (Emphasis mine. Heh.)

That’s followed by an astonishing amount of curses, truly horrible shit, from petty infliction of hemorrhoids to family doing the worst things to you. Oh, and I guess you fellows haven’t heard, but all the pharaohs are dead. Long dead. As for the Tiny Tyrant, he cant control himself, in any sense of the word. That’s why he can’t run any business successfully, and resorts to cons and grifting.

RWW has the full story.


  1. says

    Monarchy, regardless of where it’s taken place, has always been considered to be of divine origin and choice.

    That’s because they actually have no other reason to justify a monarchy. Unless it’s just red-fisted force, in which case we call it an “autocracy” until it slowly mellows into an aristocracy. Because being a lying political weasel is, apparently, hereditary.

  2. lumipuna says

    So…Deep state is like Pharaoh and Trump is like King of Israel, and they’re both deeply flawed people, exercising power over people and wrestling the power from each other according to an omnipotent God’s whims, above all human judgement?

    No wonder Americans are frustrated with their political system.

  3. busterggi says

    “In the days of the Pharaoh of Egypt”

    Um, anyone want to tell him that there was more than one pharaoh in the several thousand years that the Egyptian empire existed?

  4. vucodlak says

    The ancient Egyptians had gods, you know, and they took them pretty damn seriously.

    Ah, but they didn’t rely exclusively on male gods (never mind that the Holy Spirit is often described as female; I don’t think most Christians like Paul McGuire even remember that they supposedly revere that part of their god too) like properly pious Christians do, so they were obviously wrong and evil.

    I much prefer Egyptian mythology to Christian “historical record” (massive eyeroll). Take my favorite of the Egyptian pantheon, Isis. Her name (Aset/Auset) means originally meant ‘seat,’ and later became ‘throne.’ In some dynasties, the pharaoh was closely associated with her son, Horus, who became the king of the gods. The important thing to remember about that is that Horus only took the throne of king of the gods because Isis put him there.

    Isis is the one who deposed Ra, the first king of the gods, so that her beloved brother/husband Osiris could rule as the first pharaoh. Isis is the one who gave her son, Horus, the power to defeat the usurper, Set. She also raised Osiris from the dead after Set drowned him and tore him apart, creating the first mummy, setting him up as the Lord of the Dead and inventing the strap-on along the way.

    In other words, a man might wield the power in ancient Egypt, but a woman is the power, and she chooses the ruler. Who was occasionally a woman. Little wonder misogynistic Christians have such a hate-on for the pharaohs. And I’m not saying the pharaohs were good people, but they weren’t worse than any of the other rulers of their time.

    Of course, I kinda get the feeling that when they say “pharaoh” they really mean the previous president, which is a whole other racist pile of garbage.

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