Stable Audio

Right now, the popularity/interest in stable audio is so high that you basically can’t get to it unless you’re a journalist who has a public relations person making calls for you.

But that will end, soon enough. There are a few examples of its output on youtube.

Ah, I got through and the results are … terrible.

I give you: zombie trance dance music with drums by john bonham

Well, that’s a matter of opinion. But the ghost of Bonzo is drunkely flailing his arms around in hell at the very thought.

The second attempt, slowing it down from a frantic burner beat, works better for me:

zombie trance dance music with drums by john bonham – 60bpm lots of tom tom

But, like most/all AI stuff, it’s going to improve rapidly and once it does, the market for “pop music” will implode. Also, theme music for youtube postings. You can create abominations quite easily.

[Content warning: epic bad] baroque zombie trance dance music with drums by john bonham and harpsichord – 60bpm lots of tom tom

The UI is pretty simple. I think they had to work hard to come up with something that had more than zero visual interest.

This one makes me want to reach across the table and hammer a fork into someone’s forehead:

an “earworm” loopable jingle that sounds like an 80’s breakfast cereal ad

Have you had enough? What this posting needs is:

a slow ponderous death metal track with wailing guitars, suitable for the background of a blog posting about being anal probed by aliens. with drums by john bonham.

It’s still better than a lot of the crap on the top 10 bubblegum circuit. So, stay tuned!!!

[Remember the old days on myspace when you might click on a page and have your ears assaulted by looped samples from dog knows what? Don’t worry – I wouldn’t do that you you, because I can’t – most browsers block it.]


  1. says

    Horrifically bad. I’ve been playing kit drums for 50+ years, and if that has anything to do with John Bonham, then I’m Olivia Wayne Newton John. I do not recognize any of that as music. Granted, I don’t like Taylor Swift, but I recognize what she does as music. Some of that reminds me of the worst of rap/dance that’s just a simple looped beat with some ad hoc sonic tomatoes thrown at it (minus the vocal which has no recognizable melody and which has little relation to the beat).

    This could be improved 1000% and I’d still consider it worthy only as a means of torturing someone.

    I need a good dose of Zappa now. Inca Roads or perhaps Montana. “I’m riding a small tiny horse. His name is Mighty Little, he’s a good horse, even though he’s a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or blanket on anyway, anyway…”

  2. seachange says

    I too was thinking Marcus lives in a rural area: horses.

    The breakfast cereal is pentacle shaped with sparkly bits and circular marshmallows with a dreamcatcher pattern printed on it in edible color. ‘Beltaine Bites. Set fire to your leftovers!’

  3. sonofrojblake says

    Having everything “with drums by John Bonham” is way funnier to me than it should be.

    Like it’s some fundamental feature of music that everything has to sound like that…

  4. sonofrojblake says

    I can’t stop thinking about this.

    Soundtrack to the climactic lightsaber duel in a Star Wars movie where all the actors are dogs, played on two dozen Stylophones with drums by John Bonham.

    90s bubblegum pop track advertising flood defence equipment exclusively using the black keys on the keyboard, with drums by John Bonham.

    Ambient techno relaxation/meditation track with commentary by a Dalek, with drums by John Bonham.

    ( )

  5. says

    US military officials have appealed to the public for help to find a fighter jet after losing track of it somewhere over South Carolina when the pilot ejected.

    It’s the beginning of the AI takeover! The planes are flying themselves! With drums by john bonham.

  6. GenghisFaun says

    an “earworm” loopable jingle that sounds like an 80’s breakfast cereal ad

    This definitely made me crave a bowl of Count Chocula cereal, fwiw

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