They’re trying to corrupt our holiday!

OK, I saw these links to weird decorations, and except for this set, there’s nary a cephalopod to be seen. And then I realized these aren’t squidmas decorations, they’re nerdmas decorations! Obscenity! Heresy! By not exclusively recognizing our sacred traditions and not snubbing alternatives, this is clearly an instance of the War on Squidmas.

Don’t allow this to happen. When someone waves a Mario Bros. ornament at you, or shows up wearing a stormtrooper helmet, or says “Happy Nerdmas!”, slap ’em with a tentacle and howl about how they’re oppressing you.

Informed opinion on the Gonzalez situation

Who best to talk about the Gonzalez tenure case? Since he’s an astronomer, how about another astronomer? Phil is unimpressed:

So when ISU denied Gonzalez tenure, I applauded them. Faculty members are de facto representatives of the University, and having one advocate for a provably wrong antiscientific load of crap… well, it seems counterproductive. Denying someone tenure on that basis alone is, in my opinion, perfectly valid, and in fact should be demanded.

It will feed their martyr complex a little more, but it’s true — when you’re trying to peddle weird pseudoscience and you don’t have the evidence to back it up, you don’t get to join the ranks of professional scientists.

And how about the opinion of someone who was there? Evil Monkey reports direct from Iowa, and he makes the point that Gonzalez’s grant record did not come close to that of his colleagues, and that’s counting an chunk of change straight from the Discovery Institute.

So Gonzalez brought in about 1/10th of the funds of his other colleagues, on average, at best. A good chunk of that went back to the University of Washington to pay a grad student, not ISU. The Templeton grant to write Privileged Planet would pay a portion of his salary, not fund research and advance the mission of his department. And the DI grant (having probably the most fortuitous timing I’ve ever seen) of $50k over 5 years won’t even pay a technician for two full years. The DI claims not much money is needed to do astronomy research, simply on a computer to crunch numbers (which is laughable as typically universities provide some computers to their professors). But somebody, be it a technician, a grad student, or a postdoc, has to be paid to collect data, which that requires salary, benefits, and ‘scope time. Obviously it does require serious cash, as his peers are pulling in over ten times the money Gonzalez is. By way of comparison, I coauthored a grant that netted $198,000 over the course of one year when I was a postdoc.

Poor Guillermo. What he should be doing is either writing grant proposals, or writing applications for jobs that have lesser requirements for bringing in external funds. Instead, he’s looking on as the DI digs a deep grave in which to bury his career.

Seattle, I am seething with envy

I wish I could be there this Friday — this sounds like an extremely cool art gallery event, sponsored by the Cephalopod Appreciation Society. See, Seattle gets a whole society, while Morris just gets me, sitting in a corner, pining for molluscs. If you’re in Seattle, you should go. Tell ’em I sent you.

Please join the CEPHALOPOD APPRECIATION SOCIETY Friday, DECEMBER 7th at the McLeod Residence for an art opening and squid celebration featuring 20-foot Giant Squids made of fabric by NY artist Cassandra Nguyen.

The general reception is from 6:00 – 9:00 p.m., and from 7:30-8:30 p.m., the Cephalopod Appreciation Society will host Squid-inspired Poetry and Music performances daringly paired with Live-Action Blind Drawings of the elusive giant squid!

Please come early to sign-up as a blind drawer – you will be randomly teamed up with a poet or musician, blindfolded, and only given the length of that particular piece to create your work. The giant squid has so rarely been observed by human eyes – we eagerly await the creative insight your blind drawing will provide!

Dedicated to spreading cephalopod love, knowledge & understanding through art and science, the Cephalopod Appreciation Society is going on its sixth year. It’s been a big year for giant squid, and a big year for us. We can’t wait to party with you at the McLeod Residence!

Sincerely, squid girl, Cephalopod Appreciation Society Members, and of course the Chambered Nautilus, Cuttlefish, Octopus and Squid

McLeod Residence
2209 2nd Ave.
Seattle, Washington 98121

Squid-inspired poets and performers will include:
A.K. Allin
Anne Bradfield / Elizabeth Bradfield
Levi Fuller
Rachael Harper
Rebecca Hoogs
Rachel Kessler
Travis Nichols
Melanie Noel
Avery Slater
Cody Walker
Deborah Woodard
and more!

For more information about this event, visit:
http://blog.mcleodresidence.com/2007/11/press-release-b.html and
http://upcoming.yahoo.com/event/328305/

“I don’t think anything predated Christians”

Sherri “the earth is flat” Shepherd advances the atheist cause for us once again by demonstrating just how stupid going to church can make you. This time, it was about history: Jesus came before the Romans and the Greeks, the Greeks threw Christians to the lions, and nothing could have preceded Jesus.

It just goes to show, though, that there is no intelligence minimum for the chattering pundit class.

Putting women in their proper place

Ladies! Here’s the class for you!

The class, “Biblical Model for Home and Family,” is one of nine courses, with others focusing on the value of a child, clothing construction, nutrition, and meal preparation, that make up a homemaking concentration Southwestern began offering female humanities majors this fall.

The move has attracted criticism, but Bible-based homemaking courses aren’t that unusual. Masters College, a Christian liberal-arts school in California, offers courses teaching women how to cook, manage time, and “joyfully submit to their husbands.” Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, Ky., offers a marriage and family class teaching wives how to meet their husbands’ needs and keep marriage exciting.

Why am I not surprised that this course is offered by Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, new home to William Dembski? It does seem like his kind of place.

That’s a seminary, where people go to get lobotomized anyway…but what is the Discovery Channel Store’s excuse? Here’s what they advertise as appropriate science gifts for boys:

    Cube Word Series 2 Set (“Create your very own interactive world”)

  • Discovery ATM Machine (“This at-home ATM is an excellent way to learn about saving money.”)
  • Discovery Radio Controlled Arthropods
  • Virtual Distance Football
  • Discovery Star Theater

And here’s what the girls get:

  • Rainbow In My Room
  • Discovery Sew Fun Sewing Machine
  • Discovery Pink Slide and Text Messengers (“Chat with your friends wirelessly and transmit text messages up to 15′ away.”)
  • Discovery Diamond Dust Microscope
  • Discovery Fashion Design Studio

Yeesh. No wonder we have a hard time getting women into science.

Oh, well — it could be worse. They could be endorsing female genital mutilation. Nobody would be crazy enough to do that.

Where’s PZ?

People keep sending me horrible, frustrating news stories — I’ll post some later, but first, I have to restore my center with pleasant contemplation. Deep breaths. Grade some more exams. Watch some fish for a little while.

OK, here’s a pleasant memento: Mrs Janes’ 3rd grade class at O’Brien Elementary School, in Kent, Washington. The year is 1966.

i-df4051628c5ffa75e6e96ff3d5f3e4c8-mrs_janes.jpg
(click for larger image)

Top row: Cindy Burton, Kathleen Sturtz, Nancy Bull, Mary McHugh, Debbie Long, Becky Barnier, Darlene Yamada, Susan Rea, Billie Anderson, Mary McKay, Cathy Jenkins
2nd row: Mrs Janes, Richard Campbell, Richard Nault, Arthur Yabara, Brian Pittenger, Chris Bauer, Loren Deanton, Pat McCart, PZ Myers, Steven Brewer, Tommy Marino, Rob Kimoto
3rd row: Kathy Willkie, Jill Johnson, Mary Gjerness, Linda Bevilaqua, Mike Dixon, Carla Fleming, Patty Spitzer, Cathy Jones, LaJuana Smalley, Bill McDaniel

This is where I met my wife. I’m in the picture somewhere, and so is she. Think you can find us?

I think I’m feeling better now.


Names are added now, you can all stop guessing. I’m fourth from the right, middle row; the Trophy Wife™ is third from the left, front row.

Highway to hysteria

I swear, they’re trying to see how stupid they can get before my head explodes. Read Isaiah 35:8:

And an highway shall be there, and a way, and it shall be called The way of holiness; the unclean shall not pass over it; but it shall be for those: the wayfaring men, though fools, shall not err therein.

Obviously, to any brain-dead literal-minded pismire of an evangelical Christian, that is a reference to I-35, the interstate that cuts through Minnesota and Texas. Obviously. Never mind that unclean PZ Myers has driven on it quite often, or that this is the road with the bridge that collapse, or heck, that it is just a long piece of concrete with trucks blatting out nasty hot gasses all day long.

Good god.

Don’t watch this video unless you’ve got an awesome tolerance for high-density super-concentrated stupid and dancing howling raving demented fuckwits. This is America, land of prophecies, dreams, and visions taken as insight, where imaginary demons and angels are supposedly fighting over a strip of pavement.

Must rest. Intracranial pressure rising…rising…rising…

(via Minnesota Monitor)

Say hello to Charlie

I have to second Steve — this is an amazing blog, The Daily Coyote. A woman and a cat living in remote Wyoming have a friend, a young coyote.

This has got to be a frightening relationship. That’s a place where coyotes are shot on sight, with no remorse … maybe if a few more people read about Charlie, though, they won’t be so quick to kill.