I’ve always been a big dreamer. When I was a child I was certain I could do or be anything. I assumed once you reached adulthood, the sky was the limit – you can do whatever you want. I’m sure many of us felt that way as kids. I was in a rush to grow up and start my amazing life. My life hasn’t turned out the way I had planned, but that’s not necessarily bad. I want to share with you some of my childhood dreams.
I wanted to be a musician and artist.
The arts have played an important part in my life and recovery, and I’m happy to say I work in the arts. After high school, I went to music school but ended up dropping out. It was quite a blow to my self-esteem but it set me on a path to really focus on visual art and writing. The arts have taken many different forms in my life and the best part is I get to share them with my daughter.
I wanted to live in New York City.
Now I prefer to stay far away from NYC – or any big city for that matter. I’ve visited NYC a few times and it feels like a different planet compared to where I’m from. I used to think big cities were exciting but now they just send my anxiety through the roof.
I wanted children but I didn’t want to get married.
As you can imagine, in my small conservative town it was a bit scandalous for a kid to say they wanted children but didn’t want to get married. The funny part is that it took me a long time to figure out why adults found it upsetting. I didn’t see a problem with it because my dad was a single parent.
I was going to kick ass in college. I would breeze through – no problem!
It was such a big deal for me to go to college. I had my mind set on it from a very young age. There was just no question – after high school, I would move away and go to a university. I had no idea that mental illness would derail my plans and I was absolutely heartbroken when it did. It wasn’t a complete loss though – in my 30s I went to community college and got an associate’s degree in commercial art.
There were many more dreams but those were the big ones. I assumed my plans would fall into place without even a hiccup. I’ve faced a lot of adversity but I’ve had just as much opportunity and success. My life doesn’t look anything like I thought it would, but for the first time, I feel I am right where I need to be.
Now it’s your turn – I want to read your childhood dreams! Did any of them come true?