Hey, Art!

Not really. :D This is one of the T-shirts I was using when doing Submerged, then the rats did their part. I’m sure if I was enough of a pretentious twit, framed it, stuck it in a gallery, and made up a buncha twaddle about its significance, I could make good change off it. That won’t happen though. It’s gone back to the rats. Click for full size.

© C. Ford.


  1. says

    Hahahahahahaha. Oh my. Hadn’t thought of that one. Mine was “paint an eye on the backing where the hole is”. Thing is, I could probably get a fucktonne of money for it, when I can’t get jack shit for real work. So it goes.

  2. Tethys says

    I think the rats made some good impressionist art. The second picture almost looks like a hand or clenched fist with a bullet hole through it. I think it is worth running the experiment. There is nothing wrong with making a profit off of fortuitous rat art.

  3. says

    Well, this would mostly be fortuitous painting rag art. I was using this, along with 3 other shirts to wipe paint on Submerged, rather than use a brush. The rats did minor chewing afterwards. I already know what would happen, I don’t need to run the experiment. There’s a reason I left the art world.

  4. Tethys says

    I understand wanting to stay far away from the soul sucking judgement of the art snobs. I just like the subversive appeal of selling them rat art at a premium. It really does have some nice lines. Rich artists hire entire staffs to take care of dealing with the snobby gatekeepers of the art world.

  5. says

    Marcus, agreed.

    Tethys, if only I were rich and could afford such. Unfortunately, going back into the art world necessitates having to be put on show, make nice with all the pretentious people with pockets of money, and answering every single stupid question about this piece, that piece, “oh my dear, what does it mean? I mean, I read it as existential angstblahblahblahblahblahblah, I’m right, aren’t I? I mean, I am never wrong.” and so forth. No.

  6. chigau (違う) says

    It’s monetary value increases with every dose of rat pee and with every conversion of polycotton to rat poo.
    so impractical

  7. kestrel says

    Yeah. I’m with Caine: the art holes make it really really hard to be in that world. Although I can see the point: if one were cynical enough, one could put out that “these rats have talent!” and sell paintings by them. They do it with elephants and horses, and people buy the paintings. But then you still have to deal with the art holes.

  8. Tethys says

    Urghh, just reading the explain your art conversation makes me feel anxious. I wish that most creative careers weren’t in areas that are also far beyond the means of average people. Jewelers, fashion designers, artists all need to cater to the elite in order to cultivate the cache/ exclusive attitude of luxury goods. Branding and capitalism is far more important than the actual product.

  9. says

    Getting into galleries isn’t problematic. Most people can, without much trouble. The problem there is, if you don’t know how to negotiate that world, you really, really need a manager. Managers want money, a lot of it. You can generally find a manager too, without much problem, but it will cost you quite a bit at the beginning. Before you contract with a manager, you should have a lawyer. Now, the type of gallery you get into, that matters. Small local galleries won’t do much for you. And truth is, most people don’t go to art galleries, not in small towns.[Frinst., here in nDakota, you can get into shows easy, you pay for the privilege.] So, for it to matter, you have to be somewhere where there are major galleries which are part of the “art scene”. That’s where you hit the stratosphere in pretentious bullshit. The song Marcus mentioned? It’s about that. It’s about being ignored by the galleries that “matter.” The ones that can launch a career or break it.

    You don’t do that level of things without being put on show and doing the rounds. Every rich artist had to do that shit. Even when you try to avoid some of it, by minimizing physical shows with a ‘net presence, the show is expected. You must have an artist’s statement. I really hate that sort of thing. I’m just not a ‘bare your soul’ type of person. A couple of months ago, I was talking with Rick, and notice he’s just sitting there gaping at me, so I stopped, and he says “Forty years. Forty years, I’ve been with you, and you never told me that.” I was just, uh, and? and feeling quite embarrassed. I can do the cordial surface stuff, but beyond that, I get so uncomfortable.

    And then, everywhere in the middle, artists, artisans, craftspeople of all types, they run into…people. People who are always critical. People who are always astonished you expect a decent wage for your work. People are astonished that you have the nerve to consider artwork to be actual work. Because it’s not like you have an actual job or anything. People run the gamut there, and most of them don’t consider art to be worth a hell of a lot. A lot of them think they should be entitled to your work for free.

    And artist isn’t my job, it’s me. That’s who I am, so I’ll do what I do until I can’t. If I make some money along the way, that’s great. But like Harry in the Dire Straits song, I’ll die in obscurity. And that’s okay. There are, literally, more important things, and being back in the art world would make me stone miserable. Not long ago, a friend was very taken with a piece I did, and asked if they could possibly get a print. I said sure, and sent them the painting. Now, I did that for a couple reasons. Doing a run of good art prints is expensive, and it’s difficult to get the level of printing I’d like here. You have to do a minimum amount, which means I’d have to go to the trouble of marketing the prints and selling them, most likely for a small dollar amount. The main reason though? I had an opportunity to make someone else’s memory manifest. I had an opportunity to make one person really happy. That will always matter more than money.

Leave a Reply