BFF’s mom has died

You might have read the other day that my BFF had to take off in an emergency kind of way to rush back east because her mom who had been ill and was probably going to be moved to hospice soon suddenly came down with an infectious respiratory disease and the docs weren’t sure if she would last the 10 days until BFF’s scheduled trip, or even 24 hours.

BFF’sM lasted almost a whole week, long enough for BFF to get back home and visit with her. At her most alert she only opened a single eye for just a short time, and gave BFF a hand squeeze, but she was made comfortable and she had her family about her. It was wonderful for BFF that she was able to change her flight plans & make it home with 36 hours to spare before that last time her mother opened an eye and was able to look at her.

It’s sad, of course. But there were so many things about her that I loved. There are, of course, too many to list here, but the one that makes me smile most is that she became an outspoken advocate for women her age sexually objectifying the asses of the hot, lycra-clad Tour de France riders every June. She also would attend MLS games & ogle the players.

There was something delightful about a white-haired New England church lady and school marm (she was a teacher for over 40 years) waxing enthusiastic about how TV was showing off hot man ass for a month a year now. So if you feel touched by anything I’ve written about her, past or present, you could do something nice for your library as she often did, or you could just go look at the hot man asses of professional cyclists for a few minutes & know that she would approve.


  1. kestrel says

    I’m so sorry. We all have to die, but how wonderful for your BFF’s mom that she died so loved and surrounded by family.

  2. says

    It finally landed a bit closer to home for me. A group of young people in my boyfriend’s extended family all got COVID, four people neighborhood of 20 years old and the mother of two of them, closer to my age at 45-ish. Kids bounced back, for their mom, time will tell. That stuff moves fast. I never know what to say, I have a canned response for when I’m taking these reports at work. Just nothing feels right.

  3. DonDueed says

    Sorry, Crip Dyke. Hope you and your BFF will get through this all right.

    This “sudden infectious respiratory disease — did it have a name? I hope your friend and their family are safe, and don’t have to suffer for those final moments with their mom.

  4. says


    This “sudden infectious respiratory disease — did it have a name?

    Well, we were told a while back that they were presuming COVID, but I don’t know why. It may just have been a “prepare for the worst” mentality on the part of the doctors, combined with a certain minimal resemblance. Certainly she was in and out of facilities that were also treating COVID patients at the same time they were traating her, so COVID is certainly plausible. It may also have been that they had a lot more reason than that to presume COVID. I just don’t know. What I do know for sure is that at the time that this cropped up Wednesday/Thursday last week is that they were very clear that she hadn’t been confirmed to have COVID, but that they were treating it that way.

    I thought that I would hear follow up on that, but I haven’t. It might be that since she was in hospice they wren’t worried about precise diagnosis – she was expected to die anyway. It might be that they tested for COVID & it came back negative. The truth is that I just don’t know, but the longer things go without COVID being confirmed the more I think I misunderstood exactly what “presumed COVID” meant in this context.

  5. springa73 says

    I’m sorry to hear about your best friend’s and your loss. I reminds me of when my Dad died after about a week battling pneumonia a little more than 3 years ago. He had dementia, and I was lucky enough to live near him so that I was able to be with him both during his final illness and when the dementia was progressing, as painful as that sometimes was.

  6. StevoR says

    My condolences. Words that seem so very inadequate. I gather she was a good human being who made the world much better by being in it and who will be fondly remembered by many others. That seems a good life and good legacy to me. Respect. Vale and thankyou.

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