The Tiny Toddler Tyrant is having a tantrum over riding in the Queen’s gold carriage when he visits London. Needless to say, it’s a security nightmare in the best of times, and these are not the best of times. President Obama waived this bit of pomp in order to spare everyone said security nightmare, but Tiny Toddler Trump? Oh no, he wants his carriage ride. A gold carriage? Why, that just has “Trump” written all over it, right?
Donald Trump waving from the Queen’s royal carriage is not a scenario many would have foreseen a year ago, but it has become a very real prospect, forcing security services to plan an unprecedented lockdown.
The White House has made clear it regards the carriage procession down the Mall as an essential element of the itinerary for the visit currently planned for the second week of October, according to officials.
Security sources have warned, however, that the procession will require a “monster” security operation, far greater than for any recent state visit.
Essential? No, it’s not essential. President Obama showed that it was no such thing, and had a wonderful visit. This is a capsule portrait of the monstrous toddler currently loose in the white house. He wants what he wants when he wants it, there’s zero possibility of acting like a godsdamn adult. Yet another 70something white man who thinks the world is his little plaything on a gold platter. Naturally, there isn’t one single thing on this planet which is more important, and essential than Tiny Trump getting his gold carriage ride.
British security services are balking, saying the president’s wish is presenting them with “monster” problems is helping to keep the U.S. president safe.
London Metropolitan Police have already been making plans for Trump’s visit, expecting tens of thousands of protesters to descend on the procession route. Their preference is for Trump to make use of a bullet and bomb-proof car that was previously used by former President Barack Obama.
“The vehicle which carries the president of the United States is a spectacular vehicle. It is designed to withstand a massive attack like a low-level rocket grenade,” a police source explained. “If he’s in that vehicle he is incredibly well protected and on top of that it can travel at enormous speed. If he is in a golden coach being dragged up the Mall by a couple of horses, the risk factor is dramatically increased.”
Perhaps they should consider spraying the merely spectacular vehicle with gold paint, and having horses trot along in front.