We prefer our Jebus impotent, please

Somebody took offense again. An art museum in England is exhibiting some controversial statues, and of course some kook can’t just stay away, they have to make sure no one else gets to see them.

A Christian group is taking an art centre to court, claiming it displayed an indecent statue of Jesus Christ.

The artwork was part of an exhibition at Gateshead’s Baltic Centre featuring several plaster figures with erections, including ET, Mickey Mouse and Jesus.

Lawyers for Christian Emily Mapfuwa, 40, of Essex, are bringing a civil case for outraging public decency.

It seems a little unkind to demand that the poor guy be eternally flaccid, as well as tortured. And look! Fatwah envy!

Mrs Mapfuwa, of Brentwood, said Baltic would not have dared depict Mohammed in such a way.

I get email

It’s true — the cracker incident is still dribbling on in my mailbox. The email is down in volume considerably — only a few dozen angry letters a day. I’m still getting a handful of actual letters every day, and those are both comical and pathetic. Usually, they’re an announcement of some ceremony that was carried out to rescue me from evil. I’ve also got lots of pamphlets and even a couple of books about ‘eucharistic miracles’, which aren’t having the effect the senders intend, I’m sure — all they do is demonstrate a greater depth of insanity than I had previously imagined.

I’ve tossed a few of the recent letters below the fold for your amusement.

[Read more…]

Krazy Kansas Kook wants to eliminate all biologists

When last we heard from Tom Willis, big-wig in the Creation Science Association for Mid-America, he was pondering whether evolutionists should be allowed to vote. Since Tom Willis is batshit insane, he decided that no, they should not, because they’re wicked godless atheists with no moral sense (you theistic evolutionists aren’t spared — you’re even worse).

Now he has upped the ante and is wondering,
Should Evolutionists Be Allowed to Roam Free in the Land?. I wonder what his answer will be?

After declaring evolutionists incompetent, unproductive, dangerous, at war with Christianity, and to have demanded the elimination of Christians (what powers of projection he has!), Willis finally explains what must be done with us.

Clearly then, “evolutionists should not be allowed to
roam free in the land.” All that remains for us to discuss is
“What should be done with evolutionists?” For the purposes
of this essay, I will ignore the minor issue of Western-style jurisprudence and merely mention possible solutions to the
“evolutionism problem,” leaving the legal details to others:

  • Labor camps. Their fellow believers were high on these.
    But, my position would be that most of them have lived
    their lives at, or near the public trough. So, after their own
    beliefs, their life should continue only as long as they can
    support themselves in the camps.

  • Require them to wear placards around their neck, or perhaps large medallions which prominently announce “Warning: Evolutionist! Mentally Incompetent – Potentially
    Dangerous.” I consider this option too dangerous.

  • Since evolutionists are liars and most do not really believe
    evolution we could employ truth serum or water-boarding
    to obtain confessions of evolution rejection. But, this
    should, at most, result in parole, because, like Muslims,
    evolutionist religion permits them to lie if there is any benefit to them.

  • An Evolutionist Colony in Antarctica could be a promising
    option. Of course inspections would be required to prevent
    too much progress. They might invent gunpowder.
    A colony on Mars would prevent gunpowder from harming
    anyone but their own kind, in the unlikely event they turned
    out to be intelligent enough to invent it.

  • All options should include 24-hour sound system playing
    Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, and Sam Harris
    reading Darwin’s Origin of Species, or the preservation of
    Favored Races by Means of Natural Selection    . Of course
    some will consider this cruel & unusual, especially since
    they will undoubtedly have that treatment for eternity.

Kansas breeds attracts the most amazing kooks. (I have been informed that quite a few of the looniest creationists in Kansas come from elsewhere.)

Not Malta, too!

Even the lovely island of Malta is infested with creationists…who have somehow acquired positions of authority in private schools.

Far from becoming extinct 65 million years ago, the dinosaurs actually co-existed with early humans, and even helped in the construction of the pyramids.
This is the word of Vince Fenech, Evangelist pastor and director of a fully licensed, State-approved Creationist institution which admits children aged between four and 18.

I have to wonder what the point of licensing schools is when the process is so porous that flaming incompetents like Fenech can run them.

What year is it, anyway?

In the reality based community, when you’ve got a problem, you call an expert with some skills and training to deal with it. In the rest of the world, you call a priest to blame evil spirits and do nothing for a small pile of money. How else to explain asking a wizened old Catholic priest to explain ‘perversions’ and STDs?

Promiscuity, as well as homosexuality and pornography, says 73 year-old Fr. Jeremy Davies, is a form of sexual perversion and can lead to demonic possession. Offering what may be an explanation for the explosion of homosexuality in recent years, Fr. Davies said, “Among the causes of homosexuality is a contagious demonic factor.”

Fr. Davies continues: “Even heterosexual promiscuity is a perversion; and intercourse, which belongs in the sanctuary of married love, can become a pathway not only for disease but also for evil spirits.”

He goes on to blame all kinds of evils on demons. Forget medical explanations: we need to treat with leeches, stat, and if that doesn’t work, an exorcism. And if that fails, there’s always the 100% successful traditional treatment: tie them to a stick and set them on fire.

To the clever dicks who think they are annoying me

One of the chores I got done this afternoon, after a much needed nap, was to go through the mail that accumulated during our long absence. Part of that job is sorting out the pile of magazines that I did not subscribe to, but that some people out there think they can sign me up for and annoy me — but which, since I did not authorize any payment, and which are usually sent to me under some sloppy permutation of my name, I simply never pay for, and eventually the publisher gets tired of sending me without recompense and the subscription fades away.

It’s a weird mix: lots of conservative political rags which get tossed into the recycling bin with barely a glance, and the rest is a mishmash of odd stuff that the sender seems to think says something about me. Out magazine I sort of understand — they want to imply that I’m gay, which they think I’d take as an insult because they do — but the yummy cover photo of Neil Patrick Harris and the nice interview inside just made me think there would be some perks to being gay. American Rider, though, is a strange choice. Am I supposed to be a leather-wearing Harley rider, too? It’s a very Tom of Finland combination, but sorry, ultimately uninteresting to me. Body+Soul is a better choice for something that would irritate, but it’s so dang silly that I can only laugh.

So I hate to say it since I am getting a giggle out of these random piles of glossy paper in my mailbox, but could you please stop wasting your time? The only people being hurt by this action are the mail carriers who have enough of a burden to haul every day, and possibly the publishers who might lose a little money on the printing (but might gain a little more ad revenue from the temporary addition to their subscriber rolls).

And planet Earth. Think of the Earth, man.

Oklahoma, you can do better than Sally Kern

I’m afraid the odious Oklahoma legislator, Sally Kern, has opened her mouth again. She has declared herself a “cultural warrior for Judeo-Christian values. I despise the term “Judeo-Christian” — it’s so fake, and such a transparent attempt to tie morality to religion. So what are these “Judeo-Christian” values?

“I am not saying everyone has to be Christian; this is not a homogenous nation,” Kern said. “What you have to be is someone who believes in a Judeo-Christian ethic, in other words, in knowing there’s a right and wrong.

That’s it? Knowing that some things are bad to do and others are good is all there is? Pagans, heathens, wiccans, atheists, Muslims, and animists all know that; dogs seem to feel guilt, and we could even argue that jellyfish are able to see the world in these kinds of binary terms. So why pretend Jews and Christians invented it?

Oh…because she has to have an absolutist rational for parochial fundagelical American bigotry.

“Not all lifestyles are equal; not all religions are equal,” she said. “Was I saying all people are not equal? Heavens no; we were all created equal.”

Kern repeated her opposition to gay marriage and homosexuality, though the lawmaker said she supports people’s individual rights.

Pssst, Oklahomans: Vote for Ron Marlett this fall. Anyone but Bughouse Sally, please.

Power of prayer

Barack Obama will be giving his acceptance speech at the DNC outside, so what do the geniuses at Focus on the Patriarchy propose to do? They urge their followers to pray for rain.

Pathetic. Why not suggest instead that they pray for thunderbolts of doom, and that the earth split open beneath Obama’s feet and swallow him up with a chthonic belch of sulfur and magma? It would be just as effective.

I swear, god-botherers nowadays have lost all sense of style.

So this is what a witchunt looks like…as a target

It actually feels kind of good, considering that my job is secure, and that these critics are looking increasingly rabidly insane. I just sit back and watch their hysteria grow. Case in point: Rod Dreher, who seems to be crawling the walls and screaming right now. In his ‘review’ of the desecration issue, nowhere does he mention the cause: the violent over-reaction of Catholics to a student in Florida walking away from Mass with a communion wafer, and the subsequent uproar calling for expulsion and punishment from Bill Donohue.

[Read more…]