C’s Eulogy

From Caine’s husband, Dakotagreasemonkey (Rick):

C’s Wake is Thursday evening, 5 to 7 PM at Stevenson’s Funeral Home in Dickinson, ND. There will be a display of C’s Art, and her music will be playing in the background. Friday morning at 11:00 AM, C will be interred in the Almont, ND Cemetary.

Virginia Alice Rink, Ginger, became my wife on March 11th, 1979. She was a talented artist, very opinionated, and used her art to express her ideas of the beauty of diversity and inclusion. She also used many “Noms de Plume” in her Art career, especially once she started corresponding on various forums and communities on-line. Caine, Chris, “C”, she used most, once she started blogging in earnest. Pen and Ink, watercolors, acrylics, Photography, digital art, embroidery, are just some of her favorite mediums. She lost her battle with cancer on 8/7/2018, and I do miss her terrribly. She has many international on-line friends, who are continuing to keep her blog alive, and below are comments about C from her friends.

  • Life threw much more at Caine than it had any right to, yet she was still and always a passionate and compassionate fighter for what is right, for human dignity and decency. Many here started our time out on Pharyngula by being whacked over the head by Caine, whose zero tolerance for people being assholes made her a fierce commenter. But Caine was so much more than that, she was a wonderful artist, great photographer, a loving partner and a good friend, even though most of us never met her in person. She created this space and this wonderful little community. Dear Rick, we feel your pain and our heartfelt condolences are with you. Dear Caine, you will be missed and remembered. None of us believed in an afterlife, except for the one in the hearts and the memories of the people we touched. Dear Caine, you live on in many hearts and the tears that are cried for you.   Giliell                          
  • This is dreadful, sad news. When I started commenting at Pharyngula, she certainly whacked me, and then so generously and kindly welcomed me. I will miss her proud, brave and fierce voice. Farewell, warrior.   Rob Grigjanis                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         
  • I feel an emptiness right now, as if my best friend had walked on. Like all of the above, I found Caine an inspiration in my own life and will miss her wit and wisdom. Vale Caine. DavidinOz
  • Si le viol, le poison, le poignard, l’incendie,
    N’ont pas encore brodé de leurs plaisants dessins
    Le canevas banal de nos piteux destins,
    C’est que notre âme, hélas! n’est pas assez hardie.

    Les Fleurs Du Mal, Baudelaire

    Her soul was bold enough, and then some.    Rob Grigjanis

  • I am at best an internet acquaintance, and I’ve been crying off and on all morning. Never let them tell you on-line isn’t real life. I respect Caine as much or more than anyone you care to name. She had a fundamental positive impact on me, both through reading her thoughts and the direct interactions we had. This is not hyperbole. I am a better person for having known her and the world is diminished with her passing.
    For those who knew her best and loved her most: I’m so terribly sorry. I can’t imagine it will help, but I promise to continue to attempt to live up to the example she set of fierce advocacy for a better world and compassion in the face of adversity that beggars the imagination. Fuck cancer, fuck death, fuck this hole that my tears aren’t filling. I’ve been here before and the only cure is doing some good in the world so that’s what I’m going to do.   FossilFishy
  • From PZ’s place:

    Many here started our time out on Pharyngula by being whacked over the head by Caine

    Haha! Caine once whacked me over the head about something stupid I said. I can’t even recall what it was exactly, but I will be grateful for that lesson forever!I rarely comment. I’m not really a part of this community… But I often read the comments. It’s easy to ignore people, but I always made it a point not to take her input for granted…And this really sucks. Caine was always on point. She was vicious. She was kind. She was fucking great.   klatu

  • This blog has lately been the first FTBlog I check out every morning. Let’s see what happens now. I never had serious arguments with Caine, but as a lurker I was impressed and somewhat woken by the seriousness of her viewpoint. She was a voice of the oppressed (both personally and as an ally), of people different from me. She also showed a heartwarming interest in other cultures, notably including mine.   Lumipuna
  • I saw this last night but I couldn’t bring myself to type anything amidst the tears. She was such an inspiration for me in so many ways and I was expecting her to come back, not this. I cherish every interaction we had over the years and I will miss and remember her always.   Nightjar                                                                                                                                               
  • The world has lost a passionate voice for those who survive abuse, for those who defend and support survivors, for me. Caine, you are no longer with us. Your writings, your passion, you words, your art, the impression you have created in this world will live on in our memories. Thank you and goodbye.   Oggie                                                                                              
  • Dear Caine. You helped me so much to complete my treatment. You calmed my fears. Thank goodness you lived on this earth for a time. I am deeply pained that time here has been cut short.   Feministhomemaker                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               
  • Rick, I am so sorry to hear this news. Know that we are all grieving right along beside you. Caine is the reason I started commenting at Pharyngula, and I too was a cupcake who learned many things from her. She was fierce in all she did. She was a passionate advocate, a multi-talented artist, and a loving true friend, even though we never met in person. I fondly remember when we all had virtual ratlings, which was a delightful and generous bit of whimsy. Her love for people and the natural world attracted and affected so many, she was the true heart of the horde. She definitely has made the world a better place, and will be sorely missed. Goodbye to our beloved Red Queen.   Tethys                                                               
  • Caine taught me more about caring for people in the short time I knew her than I ever thought a single individual could. I think she made me a better oncologist. I hope she was comfortable when she passed. I know that she was truly and very well loved.   Raucous Indignation                                                                                                                                            
  • So very saddened to read this news. Caine was a truly extraordinary, good person. The world is a lot worse off for not having her in it any more and a lot better off that she has lived and left so many memories and so much work which will go on be remembered and inspiring and helping people. I already miss her blogging and comments. She was hugely and deservedly respected and loved by so many.   StevoR                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 
  • A light has gone out, way too soon, but her fierce love can’t be, just can’t be lost. Thank you for everything, Caine, I’ll keep you tightly in my heart.   Kosznai                                              

Thanks everybody for the wonderful comments. Jayne and I are wandering around the house feeling totally lost, the anchor to our lives broke it’s rope. I was a Cupcake plenty of times, and got whacked on the head too many times to count. I was asked by the funeral home to provide a eulogy, I think I’ll just provide this post and comments as her eulogy. It’s the right thing to do, as she was very private here, with just a very few local friends. One of the reasons we chose to live in Almont , ND, is this is a town where the Side Walk (paved road) Ends. It’s taken 4 attempts to read these posts, before I could stop crying to make this one. Thank you every one, for being her friend. Thanks, everybody for the outpouring of Love. It means the world to me. Thanks for being her friend. Caine’s ashes are at funeral home now, and I’ve arranged for them to be interred in a vault in the Almont Cemetery. sometime soon, or not, if someone really wishes to be here for that event. She found this little town at the end of the sidewalk for us to live in, in her fathers native lands, so I feel it is fitting she stay here.



  1. voyager says

    Rick would like to say thank you to everyone that posted comments. Everybody’s comments made a big difference for his grieving and helped most immensely.

  2. says

    When I first crossed swords with Caine she reminded me of the character Adora Belle Dearheart in Terry Pratchett’s novel “Going Postal” known by the nickname of “Spike”. I think she was pleased with that. Long live the memory of a razor sharp talent.

  3. Nightjar says

    Thanks for this information, Dakotagreasemonkey. Even though I can’t be there for her wake and interment, I’ll be thinking of you all.

  4. jazzlet says

    Those onions are getting everywhere.

    Thank you Rick. I continue to think of you and Jayne, and am glad that at least you have each other.

  5. avalus says

    I cry again. Strange how much one can miss a person you “only” now by writing and their art.
    Fleurs du mal vraiment, Rick.

  6. says

    It’s so strange. This year I’ve lost three friends whom I’ve known entirely through the Internet. And by some coincidence, they were all women who fought for indigenous rights. I’m glad this blog goes on, that this fight continues. It can just be so devastating to lose such wonderful people, even if you’ve never met them face to face. Virtual hugs to anyone who wants them.

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