Comments

  1. says

    That’s great!! Ha!
    You could probably find some gallery that’d hang it if you came up with a catchy title like “this space intentionally left blank number 231” or perhaps “a view into the mind of the echo chamber”

    Argh, I can tell I’ll never cut it as an arteest.

  2. says

    Marcus:

    Argh, I can tell I’ll never cut it as an arteest.

    Au contraire, that’s the exact pretension you need to navigate the art world. There really isn’t any other sphere that is so completely full of shit. And you’re right, I could find a gallery to hang it, and I could probably sell it for a ridiculous price, too.

  3. kestrel says

    Haha. @Marcus. I call those people “art holes”.

    You go to a reception at a gallery. (You definitely go, because there will be FREE FOOD there, and you really need that, since food is scarce at your house.) Then you talk to a bunch of Art Holes who want to engage in bullshit-speak about the “deeper meaning” of your pieces. They say something like, “I know that the brown and earth tones represent the angst of the planet but why did you juxtapose these with white?” and you want to scream, “Because I need to sell this so I can pay my freaking RENT, you idiot” but you know full well that if you say that, it will be reported in tomorrow’s paper like some kind of deep philosophical answer. Le sigh. So instead, you explain that white is the color of the soul, which is also deeply angsty etc etc. And you die inside, a little…

    So you actually could cut it as an artist. You would probably be wildly more successful than I am. ;-)

  4. chigau (違う) says

    Somehow, I missed the bit where you were painting it black.
    I used similar cutting boards y’ars ago but was never lucky enough to get a black one.

  5. blf says

    It’s supposed to be “THIS IS A FAKE” written in modern felt-tip pen — or in this case, I suppose, painted in genuine sixteenth-century oils. On the backs of all the copies.

    (Semi-obscure Doctor Who reference.)

  6. says

    Kestrel:

    “I know that the brown and earth tones represent the angst of the planet but why did you juxtapose these with white?” and you want to scream, “Because I need to sell this so I can pay my freaking RENT, you idiot” but you know full well that if you say that, it will be reported in tomorrow’s paper like some kind of deep philosophical answer. Le sigh. So instead, you explain that white is the color of the soul, which is also deeply angsty etc etc. And you die inside, a little…

    Fuck yeah. It’s why I ran away from it all.

  7. says

    Chigau:

    Somehow, I missed the bit where you were painting it black.

    Yep. And I realize I missed an opportunity -- I shoulda put up The Stones’ “Paint It Black” for today’s music. Oh well.

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