Better sit down for this one. Santa Claus is dead.
Children watched in horror as a Santa Claus collapsed and died as he handed out presents at a Christmas party on Sunday.
This country is thoroughly screwed up. Compare these two stories.
A man was found guilty of a $2 robbery, released on parole, then sentenced to life in prison after he tested positive for marijuana. It was in Texas, and the sentence has been commuted (after he’d served 16 years for smoking pot), but still, that’s insane.
ExxonMobil was fined $5 billion for their negligence in the Exxon Valdez tanker accident, which they haven’t paid and probably plan on never paying. They just got a friendly judge to cut the penalty in half.
Both sentences occurred at about the same time. Tyrone Brown got to sit in jail for half his life for a petty crime. Lee Raymond got to grow fat and obscenely rich after poisoning the environment, and his company lawyers get to play games with the law.
That’s America.
Every war needs its bold reporters, sharing the news from the front lines…the War on Christmas has Mike Argento.
Look! It’s a dumbo octopus! There are some very good shots of this weird creature swimming near the middle.
Everyone knows you’re supposed to be reading Deep Sea News today for all things cephalopodial, right?
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My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: His Most Noble Lord PZ the Liminal of Tempting St Mary Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title |
(via Eclecticism)
Since there’s more to the world than Cephalopodmas, here are some refuges if you get tired of my giddy squiddiness.
Talk among yourselves about uncephalopodian matters, as well.
Well, if we can’t find the new Architeuthis video, we can at least enjoy a little Cephalopodmas carol, Squid and Whale.
If you’d like something more traditional, here are the lyrics for the Twelve Days of Cephalopodmas. You already know the music.
Lastly, should you really want to get into the festive spirit of the holiday, here are some photos of a whale necropsy. Warning: there is blood, there are guts. How much? Well, they used a large backhoe as a retractor.
