These are the scariest Halloween costumes ever


Zombies, ghouls, and miscellaneous brain-dead monsters:

It’s for a homeschooling conference titled Teach Them Diligently, with the motto “Strengthen Your Family Through Biblical Homeschooling”. Would you pay money to have these jokers teach your children lies?

Hmmm. I’ve got a strong family with children who grew up to make me proud, and we never had to indoctrinate them in biblical foolishness to accomplish that. What does their audience have to be so insecure about? That maybe, unless they lie really loudly, their children will grow up to ask questions and abandon dogma? Most of us consider that to be a desirable outcome.

Comments

  1. says

    I immediately recognized the four men depicted in the poster, but not the two women. Is it because the men are always given the lead roles in such right-think groups and thus the women have lower profiles? I guess the handmaidens are less prominent, per Paul’s first letter to Timothy (“I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence”).

  2. Nemo says

    Looking through the Speakers page on their site, I think the women are Heidi St. John and Sam Sorbo (yes, Kevin’s wife).

  3. says

    Some years ago, I wore a costume to a Halloween party in Seattle: overalls, flannel shirt, boots, John Deere hat, and a bunch of Republican candidate pins. Yup, I was an Eastern Washington voter. Won second place in the Scary Costume contest (lost out to an excellent Grown-up Wednesday Addams drag queen.)

  4. Sastra says

    What does their audience have to be so insecure about? That maybe, unless they lie really loudly, their children will grow up to ask questions and abandon dogma? Most of us consider that to be a desirable outcome.

    So, they think, do they.
    Christian homeschoolers often consider themselves to be the ones who ask questions and abandon dogma, because they question established scientific theories and reject the “brainwashing” coming from the surrounding secular culture. They’re Brave Mavericks bucking the system and withdrawing into an independent network of those who dare to acknowledge and follow Truth. So the whole “I’m rubber and you’re glue” defense is up and running.

    I once wore a costume to a Halloween costume party in New Orleans hosted by a skeptic organization. I went as a Christian Homeschool Mom — skirt below the knees, bobby socks, a big wooden crucifix, and a Bible with the word “Science” taped across the cover. It was comfortable, but I came nowhere near winning the contest. I don’t recall who won, but I do remember the costumer I voted for: a guy dressed up as a cross between a giant banana and Freddy Krueger.

    An “Atheist’s Nightmare on Elm Street,” of course.

  5. d3zd3z says

    Before getting too bored looking through the list, I tried looking at each of the speakers, and their little bios. I couldn’t find anything that resembled qualifications. Ostensibly, home schoolers are still interested in education, but there doesn’t seem to be anyone there qualified to talk about that. There isn’t even anything related to the “non controversial” topics such as mathematics. The closest to education was a couple from “Scripture Memory Fellowship”, which I guess makes sense. These people want students that are ignorant, and essentially uneducated, but can rattle off verses at the drop of a hat; oh, and talk about bananas.

  6. robro says

    d3zd3z — “I couldn’t find anything that resembled qualifications.” The only qualification is to believe. They BELIEVE! It’s the answer to everything.

  7. says

    In the secular homeschooling group I was in, there was a running joke:

    “Mommy, I know what christian homeschoolers are! They’re people who beat their kids!”

  8. curbyrdogma says

    Rebranding Bullshit. (WRT the two women, it’s probably an attempt to put a pretty face on their agenda and signal to parents that creationism is alright with women. Note creationists and the right-wing propaganda machine seem to trade tactics with each other).

  9. larpar says

    New commenter, long time lurker, so this is mostly a test.
    What a bunch of Bozos.
    My apologies to Bozo.

  10. hunter says

    ” That maybe, unless they lie really loudly, their children will grow up to ask questions and abandon dogma? Most of us consider that to be a desirable outcome.”

    Don’t forget that the “original sin” was making your own decisions.

  11. says

    I am so happy I was questioning religion in grade school as it was shoved down my throat. I always was questioning things at catholic sermons as a young one. I have no idea how at I want to say 4th or 5th grader at the oldest I was thinking hmmmm? But we did have an abusive father so maybe that was my start? But I remember as the priest was bellowing at Sunday church who the hell are you?

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