1. Geoff says

    According to, people with bumper stickers are dangerous drivers. They tend to take revenge on people who cut them off, etc.

    It makes no difference whether the bumper stickers are right- or left-wing.

    I’d peel them all off if I were you.

  2. says

    George Carlin:

    “Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: ‘We are the parents of a child whose self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.’ Or, ‘We are the parents of a child who has so far resisted his teachers’ attempts to break his spirit and bend him to the will of his corporate Masters.’ Here’s something realistic: ‘We have a daughter in public school who hasn’t been knocked up yet.’ ‘We have a son in public school who hasn’t shot any of his classmates yet. But he does sell drugs to your honor stucent. PLUS, he knocked up your daughter.'”

    And yes, I have listened to Complaints and Grievances way, way too many times.

    I miss George.

  3. Lord Zero says

    I can picture PZ raming the unfortunate who
    dares to scratch his cephalopod bumper stickers…
    I would do the same anyway.
    Cute squid ^^

  4. SplendidMonkey says

    I saw this one yesterday – Don’t pray in my school and I won’t think in your church

  5. says

    According to, people with bumper stickers are dangerous drivers. They tend to take revenge on people who cut them off, etc.

    It makes no difference whether the bumper stickers are right- or left-wing.

    I’d peel them all off if I were you.

    So peeling them off will magically change their aggressiveness?

  6. cicely says


    The question is, are the people driving the car responsible for the violence, or is it the bumper stickers? Do the stickers sneak around in the dead of the night with a mallet and hunt down the offending drivers?

  7. Phil says

    “if only I still had any room on the back of my car for bumperstickers.”

    PZ, please tell me you aren’t “bumper sticker guy.”

    I’m sorry, I find a montage of liberal cause bumper stickers tacky, unless you drive a psychedelic VW bus.

  8. Tim says

    Favorite bumper sticker seen this year, “I took Bush’s place in Viet Nam”.

  9. Geoff says

    Noticed a couple people pointing out how stupid my bumper stickers comment was.

    No, I don’t think bumper stickers have magic powers. But think of it this way. Let’s say that men who wear cologne tend to be sleazy (I do say this). Sure, a man wouldn’t magically de-sleaze himself by washing off his cologne. But I would advise him to wash it off anyway. It’s a start, right? And less annoying for the rest of us?

    I should say right up from that I am very forward with both my atheism and my evolutionarianism. But while at high velocities I try to be in harmony with even the piggiest of right-wingers.

    PS: One time on the highway in Connecticut I was chased down by some housepainters and threatened with a stomping. My crime? I was driving a borrowed car with a bumper sticker that read “Read the News Today? Thank a Journalist”. Still not 100% sure why that offended them.

  10. Kenny P says

    I always wanted to write bumper stickers for a living, but, alas, I don’t think it pays well. My first would be:
    False Pregnancies Are A Misconception

  11. Tim says

    Pet giant squid?, “The deep range”,Arthur C. Clarke, 1957, suggests a method for capture, sounds expensive.

  12. clarence says

    My bestest bumper sticker is “My corgi is so evolved that in comparison your honor student is like a primitive fish with legs.” Wordy, yes, but corgi owners read quickly.

    Sadly, Obey the Purebred does not feature any cephalopods yet. But if you shared the good squid news, they might.

  13. says

    Since Giant Squid are smarter than hono(u)r students, they are smarter than all students, with the rare exception of those students who are so smart they avoid being hono(u)red. This might explain why sightings of live healthy (near-)adult Giant Squid are so rare; they are too smart to be found at the local pub, pizza joint, or stuffed into a telephone booth. About the only thing they both have in common is eating living fish.

    As such, clearly it’s the students who should be kept as pets, put in aquariums, and hunted by tourists and scientists, fishermen, and whales. The large number of students suggest an easing of the marine food storage. It shouldn’t be too difficult to scatter them about the oceans; with the help of a bit–make that a lot–of alcohol, the fishfood will naturally fall overboard of their own accord.

    But will that be enough to encourage the Giant Squid to start attending university? I suppose a recruitment campaign is necessary, ranging from the simple motivation “No hungry whales here! (But watch out for the nearsighted geeks in Engineering.)” to active headhunting.

    We should start seeing results quickly. Who knows, a future Giant Squidentist may be ablt to tell use were the mice, dolphins, and Bad Astronomer went.

  14. Rey Fox says

    “I’d peel them all off if I were you.”

    I dunno. If having bumper stickers on my car might make people think I’m an aggressive driver, then maybe they’ll give me more space on the road. I drive a compact car, I might as well make it more visible.

  15. mjfgates says

    Instead of a bumper sticker, I’d much rather have a life-size plastic giant squid on the back of my car, tentacles reaching out to grasp the vehicle behind me…

  16. Gruggach says

    I recently saw this bumper sticker: “God is my co-pilot, but we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat him.”