For Your Enjoyment: How do you solve a problem like The Donald?


Apropos of nothing, I happened to dash this off today:

He’s got a favorite word, it’s “Me!”
His list of values starts with Greed.
He grabs any woman’s ass
Thinks gold leaf equals class
And underneath his toupee
you’ll find half an idea per day
He loves the bible so much he made a golden calf!

He never shows up for briefings
His intellect is surreal
He’s always insulting or grifting
Save when you bring the child his Happy Meal™!

I hate to have to say it
But I very firmly feel
The Donald’s not an asset to the world…

Gorka and Miller still think he’s good,
and looks fine in a starched white hood!

Oh…
How do you solve a problem like The Donald?
How do you catch a lie and pin it down?
How should a journalist describe The Donald?
A snowflake with Alzheimers! A white supremacist clown!

Many a thing you know you’d like to tell him
Many a thing he ought to understand
But how do you make him stay
And hear what the experts say?
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?

Oh, how do you solve a problem like The Donald
Who has to point out his brain’s existence with his hand?

At his pressers he’s confused,
Out of focus and bemused,
And always seems about to nuke Iran!
Unpredictable as weather
He’s as flighty as a feather
He’s demented! He’s deficient! A con man!

He appeases the fascists!
Role models for sadists
He out-narcissists Narcissus!

He is boastful! He is mean!
He’s mendacious! He’s obscene!
And he thinks he can give orders
to the world!

How do you solve a problem like The Donald?
How do you catch a lie and pin it down?
How should a journalist describe The Donald?
A snowflake with Alzheimers! A white supremacist clown!

Many a thing you know you’d like to tell him;
Many his marbles lost that must be found.
But how do you make him stay
And hear what the experts say
When he’s convinced his navel lint is profound?

Oh, how do you solve a problem like The Donald?
Impeach him and burn his government to the ground!

Of course, my singing skills are atrocious, so you’ll have to find others to give it voice.

 

 

Comments

  1. kestrel says

    Love it. I’ll be singing it in my head, for I am not the sort of person who should sing out loud.

  2. StevoR says

    Hearing it as a Gilbert and Sullivan musical farce here. Love it. 🙂

    BTW. Suspect you already know about the Parody Project who have made / altered songs like this :

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1eR0ckpJ3bk

    Plus this :

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iIJyHTqGmo&t=249s

    (Sorry if that starts mid song there – can’t seem to get it to begin at the beginning for some reason. Take it back to start if so because its worth that full viewing.)

    & this :

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57jRBt4h6ks

    but if not enjoy (if so enjoy anyhow I hope too!) & I wonder if they might be interested in a collaboration here?

    WARNING & apologies if that wrecks “Sound of Silence’Battle Hymn of the Republic’ and /or ëmergency”for anyone.

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