Better sit down for this one. Santa Claus is dead.
Children watched in horror as a Santa Claus collapsed and died as he handed out presents at a Christmas party on Sunday.
Maybe we should sic Edward Tufte on ’em—Feministing found some amazing posters that purport to explain everything with the power of overwrought metaphor and cluttered, confusing cartoons. It just draws your eye in with the awesomeness of its arbitrariness.
So contraception is the source of single-parent families and infanticide? The stalk of divorce leads to the flower of abortion? The leaves of adultery and pre-marital sex use sunlight and carbon dioxide to make the sugar of sexual chaos that is stored in the root of coitus interruptus? Watch out, kids, if you blow on the puffball of euthansia, you’ll spread the seeds of a thousand new sex weeds! Now go in the house and wash the lust and hedonism off your hands.
It just doesn’t make sense.
I realized, though, that anybody can slap random labels on a random diagram to send meaningless messages out. Even me. So here you go, a fun and informative diagram that will help you understand all kinds of curious relationships in the world around you.
Please, use this information wisely and be sure to let it guide your life…to a brighter, healthier future, rich with the well-earned fruits of ying tong iddle I po.
We know that spammers cobble up chunks of text by skimming various sources, such as religious tracts, but a reader has discovered that they also pull random text from newspapers. My name has appeared in spam!
That’s from a Star Tribune article that quoted me—now I’m wondering what the spammer was trying to sell under my name.
Sometimes one does get a little tired of powerpoint presentations, but the subject matter can help overcome the tedium: here’s one on The Evolution of Vampires, Homo sapiens whedonum. It’s an interesting exercise in free-running BS, but still, there’s some surprisingly accurate general information about the principles of evolution embedded in all the silliness.
(via Jonathan Arnold)
This spam mail came into my mailbox, and I made the mistake of opening it. I know the spammers throw in random blocks of text and mangle the porn keywords to throw off our filters, but this juxtaposition was just plain weird.
Fundamentalists believe Jesus was God becoming man. I believe that Jesus was man becoming God.
URL deleted
Rvedhead Gxirl Sfucking Her Fhirst GIGTANTCOCKThe Holy Spirit can’t save saints or seats. If we don’t know any non-Christians, how can we introduce them to the Savior?Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
Idleness is the stupidity of the body, and stupidity is the idleness of the mind.Jump into the middle of things, get your hands dirty, fall flat on your face, and then reach for the stars.
I suspect this would have been more effective at getting people to look at their site if they left out the garbled English line after the url. Although, I don’t know since I didn’t follow the link—maybe there’s an evangelical Christian site there.
(I sincerely hate and despise spammers. Currently, I’m getting about 2:1 junk:real mail ratios delivered to my laptop, and that’s after spam assassin torches much of it at one of the intermediary sites I run mail through.)
Somehow, I think I got a shave, too.
At least Wilkins looks exactly as he does in real life.
Blame Nic for this…but did you know you can put your face on a dancing elf and make a spectacle of yourself? If you have the guts, click here for the show.
Or if you’d rather, watch Nic dance. All the faculty out here at the University of Minnesota Morris are elfin, as you can see.
Now we just need to get all the scienceblogs people to join in, and we can have an all-dancing scienceblogs review!
This could get disturbing. Here are the latest scienceblogs elves:
OK, this fellow in Fond du Lac, Wisconsin saw a strange-looking deer: it had the stubs of extra legs growing out of 3 of its limbs, and it was an intersex. That’s strange enough, and is of developmental interest, and would have me wondering what kind of environmental stresses are perturbing wildlife development in that neck of the woods.
The fellow hit the deer with his truck and killed it, and reported it to the DNR. So it’s actually road kill, a very common thing.
Now here’s where I get baffled: the man ate it afterwards.
“And by the way, I did eat it,” Lisko said. “It was tasty.”
Jebus. Wisconsin. At least he didn’t have sex with it first, I don’t think.
Here’s another article on that freaky Left Behind video game. The rationalizations for the ability to kill people violently in the game are fascinating.
Left Behind Games’ president, Jeffrey Frichner, says the game actually is
pacifist because players lose “spirit points” every time they gun down
nonbelievers rather than convert them. They can earn spirit points again by
having their character pray.
Isn’t the most wonderful version of pacifism ever? Go out, butcher a few people, engage in a warlike campaign…and as long as you beg an invisible man’s forgiveness afterwards, you can still call yourself a pacifist. With that kind of reasoning, Ted Haggard is a heterosexual, Bill Bennett is a cautious investor, and Ted Nugent is an environmentalist. No wonder Christianity is popular among hypocrites.
