And, given how popular artificial hymens are, it would be great if the majority of people actually knew what a hymen is, and how may different shapes there are, and that not all women are born with them. A hymen as a freshness seal is way too close to the idea most people have of a hymen.
And this whole idea of “busting hymens”, “causing bleeding”, and “it always hurts at first” leads to a lot of bad first sex, where those with penises are more likely to see pain, bleeding, pinching of the vaginal tissue and so on as “good things” and those with vaginas are more likely to just try and endure it. Neither teaches either anything positive with regards to their future sexual encounters.
Also, there is so much garbage myth-making about that whole reproductive system. See also the weird belief that vaginas are “stretched out” by penises and become floppier the fewer cocks they’ve touched, which stems from the same sort of “penises corrupt women, so target the youngest, least experienced, most likely to put up with your abuse because general culture calls that love” mentality.
Those misconceptions are, in my experience, almost as widespread among people who own vaginas as they are are among those who don’t. In the case of most penis havers, in our culture, where ignorance about female genitalia is almost a batch of honor, something to be proud of and protect with your life, because icky and gross but most of all, feminine, so who gives a fuck, it’s unsurprising that the myths are prefered over reality because they reinforce and validate all sorts of horseshit. But it does surprise me that in this day and age, educated women who own vaginas are often just as misinformed and as likely to accept the myths that hurt them as the men who benefit from them. Clearly it’s a result of how pervasive this is, but it feels a bit odd.
Incidentally, every time i hear a man say that they don’t know where the clitoris is i feel the urge to smack them.
But it does surprise me that in this day and age, educated women who own vaginas are often just as misinformed and as likely to accept the myths that hurt them as the men who benefit from them. Clearly it’s a result of how pervasive this is, but it feels a bit odd.
I don’t know why that would be surprising in any way. Here in the States, sex ed has never been very high on actual educational content, and we’re now into how fucking long since Shrub and his funding abstinence-only classes? In one school after another, teachers are prevented from imparting knowledge by upset parents, and when it comes to home education? Not so much. Most kids learn stuff from other kids, and misinformation thrives in such an environment. I’ll betcha boys still give each other grave pronouncements about the dire consequence of the dreaded blue balls.
As usual though, boys generally come out ahead here, too, as most people think that masturbation is a guy thing, so at least boys get a good, um, handle on their genitals. Girls are not encouraged to have anything at all to do with their genitals, outside of washing. Most girls are actively discouraged from any exploration ‘down there’, and given that it’s not often that girls are well-educated, there’s little else to go on.
I remember when Our Bodies, Ourselves came out in ’71, and all of a sudden women (and girls) were talking…about that. There’s a long history of women being alienated from their own bodies, as that was seen as right and proper. Women had no business being involved with that part of their body. It’s been a relatively short amount of time in which women have been accepting of having sexual desires and being in control of those desires, in touch with their own bodies. Women masturbating is still fairly controversial for fuck’s sake, and men certainly tell stupid, incorrect stories about that, too. Anyroad, this type of misinformation should be no surprise when it comes to the United States of Prudery and Chaste Christianity.
Callinectessays
When I was younger and I was hearing all sorts of noise about sex, I asked myself “what the fuck is a hymen?” so I looked it up on an anatomy website. It was immediately clear to me that what everyone said about it was obviously wrong and impossible. It did take a while to work out what it was that I was looking at since it was so utterly contrary to the picture that culture had painted for me that I wasn’t at first sure that I was understanding the diagram.
Dreaming of an Atheistic Newtopiasays
@9 Caine
I understand that. I was mainly talking about my own experience with my group of female friends (in Spain). They are educated, intelligent and not afraid to discuss sex candidly, but this topic in particular seems to be a bit of an exception. I understand that their education systems failed them, even though by and large we all received fairly decent sex ed (with some significant flaws), and that their society has also failed them, but these are curious women that have educated themselves on the subject and are generally well informed…and yet, when it comes to this in particular, it almost seems like it’s been purposefully avoided, and i’m not entirely sure why that might be.
Women masturbating is still fairly controversial for fuck’s sake,…
Tons of fuck insecure cry-baby-men think it’s either a personal insult that their dick actually doesn’t get most women to orgasm or that there must be something wrong with her if she does, aka “she just needs to be fucked real hard by a real man”…
And, given how popular artificial hymens are
Why, why, WHY did I click on that link?
F.O.says
Loved it. =D
blfsays
Why, why, WHY did I click on that link?
The brain-bleaching from the last time was wearing off?
Artificial hymens. Makes about as much sense as chain-mail bikini armour.
gijoelsays
I’m embarrassed that I spent two subjects last year of women’s reproductive health and I did not know the answer to that.
gijoelsays
Also I’ve never understood the appeal of ignorance.
Lace Green had a video on this subject a while back. That’s where I learned about what hymens actually are, but I do think this video is better for a wide audience.
gmacssays
This video answered so many things I’ve always wondered but never asked. Hell, I don’t remember them even mentioning the hymen in my health class. When I was 14 my brother had to explain to me why a reference to “Cherry Poppers” was supposed to be funny.
Scary, ennit? I remember that officials in Egypt wanted to ban them some years back, I don’t know if they did though. This idea that hymens are indeed a freshness seal is not only silly, it’s often deadly in some cultures.
numerobissays
“Let’s call in an expert” was pretty fantastic.
congenital cynicsays
There was only one female for whom I was the first partner, and there was no hymen busting apparent to either of us, no blood trail, no pain. I have to confess that at the time and in the heat of the moment, thoughts about hymen mythology were not on my mind. Given the variation among individuals for all manner of other traits (labia size, penis size and shape, hairiness, shape of ears, noses, etc.), one would assume that hymens also covered a wide range of forms. The average person just doesn’t seem to consider the range of variability that exists for most of our physical traits.
blf says
Apropos of nothing much, I first read the title as “Common sense about hyenas” and was looking forward to slightly different informative video.
RobertL says
blf – I read it as “hymns” and wondered what the common sense could be.
The only thing that I could think of was Tim Minchin’s take on Christmas Carols – that they have nice chords but the lyrics are dodgy.
Caine says
Excellent.
Caine says
And, given how popular artificial hymens are, it would be great if the majority of people actually knew what a hymen is, and how may different shapes there are, and that not all women are born with them. A hymen as a freshness seal is way too close to the idea most people have of a hymen.
Cerberus is working overtime at the outrage factory says
Very much so!
And this whole idea of “busting hymens”, “causing bleeding”, and “it always hurts at first” leads to a lot of bad first sex, where those with penises are more likely to see pain, bleeding, pinching of the vaginal tissue and so on as “good things” and those with vaginas are more likely to just try and endure it. Neither teaches either anything positive with regards to their future sexual encounters.
Also, there is so much garbage myth-making about that whole reproductive system. See also the weird belief that vaginas are “stretched out” by penises and become floppier the fewer cocks they’ve touched, which stems from the same sort of “penises corrupt women, so target the youngest, least experienced, most likely to put up with your abuse because general culture calls that love” mentality.
Lynna, OM says
That is a great video. Should be part of sex ed for middle school and high school students.
tbtabby says
First Adam debunks the idea that girls don’t play video games, and now this. The MRAs have a new “enemy” to whine about.
Dreaming of an Atheistic Newtopia says
Those misconceptions are, in my experience, almost as widespread among people who own vaginas as they are are among those who don’t. In the case of most penis havers, in our culture, where ignorance about female genitalia is almost a batch of honor, something to be proud of and protect with your life, because icky and gross but most of all, feminine, so who gives a fuck, it’s unsurprising that the myths are prefered over reality because they reinforce and validate all sorts of horseshit. But it does surprise me that in this day and age, educated women who own vaginas are often just as misinformed and as likely to accept the myths that hurt them as the men who benefit from them. Clearly it’s a result of how pervasive this is, but it feels a bit odd.
Incidentally, every time i hear a man say that they don’t know where the clitoris is i feel the urge to smack them.
Caine says
Dreaming @ 8:
I don’t know why that would be surprising in any way. Here in the States, sex ed has never been very high on actual educational content, and we’re now into how fucking long since Shrub and his funding abstinence-only classes? In one school after another, teachers are prevented from imparting knowledge by upset parents, and when it comes to home education? Not so much. Most kids learn stuff from other kids, and misinformation thrives in such an environment. I’ll betcha boys still give each other grave pronouncements about the dire consequence of the dreaded blue balls.
As usual though, boys generally come out ahead here, too, as most people think that masturbation is a guy thing, so at least boys get a good, um, handle on their genitals. Girls are not encouraged to have anything at all to do with their genitals, outside of washing. Most girls are actively discouraged from any exploration ‘down there’, and given that it’s not often that girls are well-educated, there’s little else to go on.
I remember when Our Bodies, Ourselves came out in ’71, and all of a sudden women (and girls) were talking…about that. There’s a long history of women being alienated from their own bodies, as that was seen as right and proper. Women had no business being involved with that part of their body. It’s been a relatively short amount of time in which women have been accepting of having sexual desires and being in control of those desires, in touch with their own bodies. Women masturbating is still fairly controversial for fuck’s sake, and men certainly tell stupid, incorrect stories about that, too. Anyroad, this type of misinformation should be no surprise when it comes to the United States of Prudery and Chaste Christianity.
Callinectes says
When I was younger and I was hearing all sorts of noise about sex, I asked myself “what the fuck is a hymen?” so I looked it up on an anatomy website. It was immediately clear to me that what everyone said about it was obviously wrong and impossible. It did take a while to work out what it was that I was looking at since it was so utterly contrary to the picture that culture had painted for me that I wasn’t at first sure that I was understanding the diagram.
Dreaming of an Atheistic Newtopia says
@9 Caine
I understand that. I was mainly talking about my own experience with my group of female friends (in Spain). They are educated, intelligent and not afraid to discuss sex candidly, but this topic in particular seems to be a bit of an exception. I understand that their education systems failed them, even though by and large we all received fairly decent sex ed (with some significant flaws), and that their society has also failed them, but these are curious women that have educated themselves on the subject and are generally well informed…and yet, when it comes to this in particular, it almost seems like it’s been purposefully avoided, and i’m not entirely sure why that might be.
Giliell, professional cynic -Ilk- says
CAine
Tons of fuck insecure cry-baby-men think it’s either a personal insult that their dick actually doesn’t get most women to orgasm or that there must be something wrong with her if she does, aka “she just needs to be fucked real hard by a real man”…
Why, why, WHY did I click on that link?
F.O. says
Loved it. =D
blf says
The brain-bleaching from the last time was wearing off?
Artificial hymens. Makes about as much sense as chain-mail bikini armour.
gijoel says
I’m embarrassed that I spent two subjects last year of women’s reproductive health and I did not know the answer to that.
gijoel says
Also I’ve never understood the appeal of ignorance.
marcoli says
Well, I learned something. Thanks, Dr. M!
Matthew Ostergren says
Lace Green had a video on this subject a while back. That’s where I learned about what hymens actually are, but I do think this video is better for a wide audience.
gmacs says
This video answered so many things I’ve always wondered but never asked. Hell, I don’t remember them even mentioning the hymen in my health class. When I was 14 my brother had to explain to me why a reference to “Cherry Poppers” was supposed to be funny.
Caine says
Types of hymens can be seen here: http://www.soc.ucsb.edu/sexinfo/article/hymen
There is a photograph of a vulva at the site, so use caution if at work.
Caine says
Giliell:
Scary, ennit? I remember that officials in Egypt wanted to ban them some years back, I don’t know if they did though. This idea that hymens are indeed a freshness seal is not only silly, it’s often deadly in some cultures.
numerobis says
“Let’s call in an expert” was pretty fantastic.
congenital cynic says
There was only one female for whom I was the first partner, and there was no hymen busting apparent to either of us, no blood trail, no pain. I have to confess that at the time and in the heat of the moment, thoughts about hymen mythology were not on my mind. Given the variation among individuals for all manner of other traits (labia size, penis size and shape, hairiness, shape of ears, noses, etc.), one would assume that hymens also covered a wide range of forms. The average person just doesn’t seem to consider the range of variability that exists for most of our physical traits.