They’re the Asshole Emperors

An amusing piece by Luke McKinney on the familiar-I-mean-stale things every anti-feminist says whenever feminism [quick make a sign of the cross] is mentioned.

You could list them in your sleep. “Prove there even is sexism.” Disputing every single word for hours on end because they have all the time in the world and they want to waste yours.

# 6 is Saint or GTFO.

This imperfection attack is digging through someone’s Internet history to see if they’ve ever said anything less than perfect. Because the only allowed options are immaculate saint or total asshole, and the antifeminists have the asshole side locked down. They’re the Asshole Emperors, defending their rule by defecating over everything and everyone who’s made the mistake of facing them.

They’ll extract something sort of stupid said several years ago, usually by ripping it more dangerously out of context than the core of an atomic warhead, and wave it around as if it was exactly that powerful.

That’s so familiar. I’ve got people – people I don’t know from a hole in the ground, people with no connection to me other than their demented obsessive hatred – examining every word I’ve ever uttered on line through a microscope and then writing million word indictments of me based on translating something into Albanian and then using the Google translation of that back into English.

It’s such an odd way to manage hatred. It’s as if they don’t even know that avoidance is a possibility. My awfulness has caused them to waste their lives in talking about my awfulness. How sad is that?

H/t Carrie Chapman


  1. PatrickG says

    My word, the comments on that Cracked article are something else.

    It’s as if they don’t even know that avoidance is a possibility.

    But no! Allowing a statement by someone even remotely sympathetic to feminism is letting the misandrists win! It’s why they must spend all their free time (and presumably non-free time) scouring the internet for instances of SISFOTI (Someone is supporting feminism on the internet!). I mean, won’t someone think of the children assholes?

  2. karmacat says

    When I read the article this afternoon there were over 1,000 comments. I started reading the comments then realized I have better things to do, like watching paint dry

  3. Deepak Shetty says

    I dont know if #1 ( Equalist Equals Asshole) covers the – I am the real feminist (aka Sommers/Dawkins) and you are just the radical extremist what know.

  4. freemage says

    Cracked is odd, much like the webcomic Sinfest–they started up as a largely traditional, frat-boy internet humor thing, with lots of typical gender essentialism, sexualized exploitation and so on.

    Then they grew up. And they actually DID mature, despite being largely the same group of people involved. They still do low-brow humor, but they do it (mostly) without punching down, and it’s generally a good thing.

    But there’s a contingent of fans from ‘the olden days’ who still long for the stuff they were comfortable with, and they will clog any discussion. The writers at Cracked, however, just double-down and put up articles like this one. It’s fascinating to watch.

  5. thephilosophicalprimate says

    I’m reading the past few days’ post in temporal order (including my comment that you made a post), and so I wanted to say that it is a complete coincidence that I make fun of the poor quality of your critics in the reply I just made to the discussion thread on my post.

  6. Blanche Quizno says

    I loved this part, from a related article suggested at the bottom of THAT article (

    The best response to sexism? Having zero tolerance for these absolute wankers. And it can be done; the infrastructure is already in place. If we have the wherewithal to instantly arrest people for making Nazi salutes or to accost women within 10 seconds of removing their shirts, then we can similarly be on hand to call out anyone who thinks they can tell others how to fucking dress. People like me need to reduce the disparity between how opposed we are to sexism and how much we actively do to help create an atmosphere that’s poisonous to it. If you’re in the same boat, then let’s do this — let’s actually be part of the conversation, because it works. Captain Picard himself has given the order, if that helps (IT SHOULD). Because doing nothing is not good enough, dammit. Not good enough. – Thanks, Winston Rowntree.

    To illustrate, another mother breastfeeding in a restaurant was immediately given her comeuppance by some man manager, who ordered her to feed her infant in the bathroom instead (she refused):

    So why can’t we react as quickly and decisively against the asshole emperors?

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