Hands off god

The NSS reports that the UAE has tightened up its laws by making it illegal to “offend” God.

Wouldn’t you think if there’s anyone who can rise above being “offended” it would be God? I mean – ants can say harsh things about me all they want to; it won’t offend me. Why? Because they’re ants. Their concerns are not my concerns, and vice versa. Our concerns are too different in nature to be subject to emotions like being “offended.” Ants are going to think I’m way too big and ugly and misshapen, aren’t they, because if the criterion is Ant, I don’t meet it. But I don’t care. I don’t particularly want to meet the Ant criterion, and I’m indifferent to any potential disgust ants might feel about how far short I fall.

It should be the same with God. God’s perfect, omni-everything, transcendent – all sorts. Why would God take anything we say personally? It makes no sense.

Gulf News reports that the legislation makes illegal “any acts that stoke religious hatred” and “any form of expression” that insults religion.

The law, passed by decree at the end of July, “prohibits any act that would be considered as insulting God, His prophets or apostles or holy books or houses of worship or graveyards.”

That’s a very very touchy god, that is. If I were going to have a god, it would be a much more magnanimous, understanding, unflappable god than that.

The legislation purports to allow for an “environment of tolerance” and “broad-mindedness”, but includes potential 10 year jail terms and substantial fines for those who break the law.

Provisions in the legislation include a prohibition on expressing doubt about the existence of God.

Anything else? Doubts about God’s shoe size? Preference in fish? Views on climate change?

UAE is right off my travel plans list.


  1. johnthedrunkard says

    God doesn’t mind The Protocols of the Elders of Zion being used as a school textbook?

  2. says

    If this “god” thing is so offended, let it hire a lawyer and file the legal writ itself instead of cultists speaking on its behalf. It’s allegedly powerful enough to create the universe, so it shouldn’t be a problem. If it doesn’t hire a lawyer, then it wasn’t offended. Unfortunately, cultists worldwide can’t figure out this one themselves.

    The little pixie god sitting on my shoulder says the UAE’s law offends it. Does that mean I can file suit against the entire UAE government?

  3. talflon says

    A god that let people say whatever they like about him would be a wuss. You can’t be both a wuss, and the pinnacle of power, at the same time. Even if people seem to be getting away with it now, he’s going to get them later. Because he’s no wuss.

  4. Jake Harban says

    Tell you what— if God is willing to personally say that he’s offended, THEN you can arrest someone for offending God.

    What they’re really doing is making it illegal to offend powerful people, who use nonexistent gods as a pretext for wielding undeserved power.

  5. says

    It’s all fun and games until the different sects of the same religion start getting offended by eachother’s interpretations. It took the christians in Europe a long time to learn the error of that particular approach (though arguably they still haven’t really learned, they’re just licking their wounds)

  6. Doubting Thomas says

    They tell us we are “created in his image”. The question I want answered is, does he have a penis and if so, what does he use it for?

  7. sambarge says

    I, for one, am prepared to take God at his word that, after a sinful, non-pious life on Earth, I will spend an eternity in Hell. I mean, if an atheist can accept that, why can believers? God is a big boy in long pants. He can take care of himself with that whole “eternal damnation” thing.

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