Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans.



Couldn’t resist. The Black Pepper Jelly Beans are utterly divine, I must find a huge bag of those. Rick moaned over the awfulness of earthworm and dirt, but I quite liked those. I’m not brave enough for rotten egg. Oh, and the grass isn’t grassy enough.


  1. says

    There’s a jelly bean quiz here. My result:

    22 and over: God, save your bean. You’ve done it. You’ve proven that your life is one giant adrenaline rush by the jelly bean choices you make. The jelly bean world is your oyster (say, there’s an idea… oyster jelly beans…), but you probably stay away from the red, green, yellow and orange beans in favor of black licorice, hot sauce and vomit beans. After all, life is short, and there are a lot of jelly beans out there. YOLO!

  2. rq says

    My sister once brought the kids these, a very similar concept, but they have identical colourings for two different flavours (one pleasant, the other -- not so much). The first time the kids tried them, and got the less-pleasant flavours (earwax, stinky socks, and I believe vomit), they cried. Literally. Even though they were warned. From then on, they turned it into a game of ‘who has it worse’. But you’re brave for trying the nastier flavours, we still have some left and I can’t bring myself to risk it. :)
    On the other hand, I might have to fight you for the black pepper jelly beans. Though I will take all the black licorice as a consolation prize, if that helps.

  3. cicely says

    You two can fight it out over my share of all the black pepper and/or licorice jelly beans in the world!

  4. thoughtsofcrys says

    When I bought a box of these (it was about 12 years ago, now I think of it) they had sardine flavor in there too. I got my uncle pretty good with those, I offered him three gray jelly beans and he just slapped them in his mouth without the slightest suspicion. His face was priceless as the taste started to dawn on him. Then I ran.

  5. johnson catman says

    Wouldn’t the vomit beans create some real vomit? I am thinking that they would for me, and I know they would for my wife, who is a sympathetic vomiter (as in, if she sees one of the cats puking, she has to exit quickly or join in the “fun”).

  6. says

    Johnson Catman, there is that hazard. They are identified, so they can be avoided. They definitely taste like vomit.

  7. blf says

    …there is that hazard.

    You’ve done it now. Again. The mildly deranged penguin is taking notes, and has already placed orders for several tonnes of bat guano, the slime from green — she was quite insistent on that — polar oysters†, and a volcano. The volcano may be delayed (they are slightly tricky to ship), but even so she reckons there will be a new self-perpetuating taste explosion on the market soon: Baaaarrrggguf!™©

     † She doesn’t mean the MUSHROOMS! She means the oysters which run roam over the Arctic tundra. They are the reason walruses go south to learn defensive carpentry and hunt better-tasting oysters.

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