Ayn Rand – Children’s film critic

Mallory Ortberg at the New Yorker has discovered what the objectivist hero, who believes that selfishness is the highest virtue, thinks of the classics of children’s films. Here are some of Rand’s reviews:

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

An industrious young woman neglects to charge for her housekeeping services and is rightly exploited for her naïveté. She dies without ever having sought her own happiness as the highest moral aim. I did not finish watching this movie, finding it impossible to sympathize with the main character. —No stars.

Mary Poppins

A woman takes a job with a wealthy family without asking for money in exchange for her services. An absurd premise. Later, her employer leaves a lucrative career in banking in order to play a children’s game. —No stars.

Charlotte’s Web

A farmer allows sentimental drawings by a bug to prevail over economic necessity and refuses to value his prize pig, Wilbur, by processing and selling him on the open market. Presumably, the pig still dies eventually, only without profiting his owners. The farmer’s daughter, Fern, learns nothing except how to become an unsuccessful farmer. There is a rat in this movie. I quite liked the rat. He knew how to extract value from his environment. —Two stars.

Her reviews also make clear that she hates dogs and likes cats.


  1. DonDueed says

    Those are satire, if you hadn’t noticed. They include reviews of movies made long after Rand’s death.

    Poejectivism, you might say.

  2. says

    I know they are satire. But, seriously, Rand is pretty much self-satire. What a lame excuse for a “philosophy” -- ugh. She was like Nietzsche: good at making pronouncements, bad at supporting them. But unlike Nietzsche, she was as boring as watching fucking paint dry and waiting for it to flake off.

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