That was some beer festival

You know you’ve been overdoing the alcohol when you find yourself naked and half-eaten by bears.

A 23-year old Serb was found dead and half-eaten in the bear cage of Belgrade Zoo at the weekend during the annual beer festival.

The man was found naked, with his clothes lying intact inside the cage. Two adult bears, Masha and Misha, had dragged the body to their feeding corner and reacted angrily when keepers tried to recover it.

I do hope nothing happens to the bears. It’s not their fault that they were offered a succulent meal, and took it.

What happens in NY should stay in NY

You may be wondering what I’m doing in New York. I’m not going to tell you, except that I will mention a dreaded phrase: late-night inebriated karaoke. Not me, sweet jebus, but there I was, overwhelmed with culture shock, in a karaoke bar, something I have never experienced before. Let me tell you, Dave can dance if he wants to, Janet does a pretty fair Liz Phair, Rich is an enthusiastic whoever-that-was, Chris truly is angry drunk Dylan, and Bora is hereafter known as monotone Elvis, but Razib stole the show with a flawless, pitch perfect impersonation of a goat on psilocybin being anally violated by an angry Wookie. Purportedly, it was a duet with Shelley, but she seemed to be singing something completely different, with melody, meter, and a single common pitch, and was drowned out by the syncopated howling.

There may be further reports from New York, unless I’m overwhelmed by the madness.

The Holy Eggplant of Boothwyn

i-faa8fd9d6844ae5400470c4363b21606-god_eggplant.jpg

If Pastor Drake’s curses are fizzling, I know exactly what he needs: a blessed medallion made from an eggplant to potentiate his jebus-power. It’s true: this miracle occurred spontaneously, and is exactly the holy artifact any righteous smiter would want on his side.

I will also call your attention to an important and obvious fact: this eggplant did not say “Gott” or “Dieu” or “Dios” or “Бог” or “Deus” or “Dio” or “神” or “الله” — no, it says “God”. Therefore, God chooses to speak in English.

Either that, or it’s the natural language of eggplants.

That’s so sweet

I’m being prayed for.

A prayer for the soul of PZ Meyers

Dear God of Enduring Love, The atheist evilutionist and liberal elite college professor PZ Meyers has lost The Way and says some of the MOST hateful things about Your Work on this Earth and Republic that it is easy to understand why good Christians would pray for the Absolute Damnation of his soul to an eternity in the Hellfire of the Beast. The darkness of his Soul must cause you at least as much pain as do the souls of Muslims and Jews. Dear God, please find in Your great Heart warmth to share in the heart of PZ Meyers, or otherwise, he will continue to perform the Demon’s Duty and steal other souls from you. And please make it difficult for the computers of children and teenagers to visit his many websites where he proclaims his Dark Message of despair and secularization so that their impressionable bodies and minds are not brought under his spell.

I am always so pleased to see my opponents appeal to the impotency of a non-existent being through the ineffectual medium of talking to themselves.

Tats for Science

Carl Zimmer is collecting examples of scientists with tattoos having a science theme. Got a tattoo? Send him a picture!

There is a weird comment about reluctance to show off these things if you don’t have tenure yet … I really don’t think skin art is one of the considerations in tenure decisions, though. At least it’s never come up in any of the reviews I’ve been involved in, although perhaps photos of artfully inked buttocks would enliven those often deadly dull tenure files.