How can you screw up an appeal to the alt-right?

One of the dismaying things about the world right now is that being an alt-right/Nazi/”centrist” is so darned easy: they’re fanatically dominating YouTube*, they’re raking in the Patreon bucks, it’s almost as if mindlessly shouting “MAGA” and “WHITE GENOCIDE” is the magic cheat code for immense popularity. So when I see someone fail, it’s a bit jarring.

Look at Jon del Arroz, the leading Hispanic voice in science fiction, as he’s fond of claiming. He’s got the MAGA hat. He’s fond of Trumpian hyperbole and raging at liberals and SJWs. He got banned from WorldCon for his troubles, so he’s busy waving his martyr’s flag. And then he announced that he was going to sue WorldCon, and started a fundraiser to scrape up $10,000 for a lawyer.

He’s raised nothing. He’s a total failure. Maybe it’s because he compared his persecution to that of the entire gay community, which isn’t going to gather much sympathy from the usual gang of racist homophobes. Anyway, it’s nice to see a right-winger fall flat on his face.

*Since I’m trying to participate more in YouTube lately, I’m seeing signs that this may not be entirely true. I’ve encountered a few people who’ve been haranguing me with multiple sock puppets — one guy is up to about 20 pseudonyms — and I’m beginning to suspect that the right-wing success story on that medium is more about fanaticism, misrepresentation, and persistence. Maybe if YouTube were to tighten up their rules on handing out new accounts freely there’d be a change, because jeez, a lot of the problems in their comment threads are due to the deniability and meaninglessness of their contributors.

Is a cat’s time really that valuable?

A cat cafe is opening in Minneapolis — the grand opening of Cafe Meow is tomorrow. It sounds like a fine idea, especially that they’ll be housing cats from a local shelter and will be encouraging adoptions. So, sure, if you like cats, you can get a bit of cuddling while drinking your morning coffee.

Except…

It’s $10/hour to hang out with a cat. I’m sorry, I go home at night and try to get some work done, and our cat will flop down in my lap and demand that I pet her, and that I don’t move because she wants to take a nap, and if I do try to type while accommodating her, she will pop up and decide to stroll about the keyboard. She should be paying me.

If this cat ever sends me a bill, it’s gonna get ugly.

You guys have no decorum. There’s no level too low to go to.

But Sargon of Akkad has standards! He rants about the alt-right by accusing them of being like “n*ggers”, “f*ggots”, and “k*kes”, and whining that he gets no respect. It’s a spectacular meltdown that couldn’t happen to a more deserving guy.

“Round the decay
Of that colossal Wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.”

One can only hope.

I suspect cancer would just bring out the worst in me

Man, it seems like suddenly I know a whole lot of people going through cancer treatment, and it’s more than a little terrifying. You should be reading Caine’s Cancer Chronicles if you like angry honesty about the disease.

I just didn’t have the energy to do this yesterday, but I talked about it in a correspondence with my friend in colon cancer treatment. Look at the people in that screenshot. Most of them with manic grins and poses, screaming “LOOK AT MY GOOD ATTITUDE! I HAVE POSITIVE!” Fuck that noise. I do not have a positive attitude. I don’t even have a good attitude. I have a shitty, cynical attitude, about most everything, and that certainly includes having cancer. If I lose that, I will be in serious trouble. My colon cancer friend is the same way. So, another little note: don’t go around telling a cancer patient something like “you have a positive attitude, and that’s the most important thing!” No, it’s not the most important thing. It’s not fucking important at all. What is important is whatever attitude your friend or loved one normally has is still intact and firing on all cylinders. If dark, twisted, gallows humour keeps someone going, don’t try to paint it pink with positivity. If razor sharp wit and observations keep someone going, allow that. It’s not up to anyone else to call the shots on what attitude will work best for any given person. As I said before, the person with cancer is still the person you know, they are still the same person they were before diagnosis; cancer is not a call to do a 360 on your personality and attitude.

I agree — if I’m ever in that situation, and I hope I’m not, I’ll be the guy with the snarl and the hair-trigger middle finger.

I must have low testosterone or something

Look at this beautiful cake. I saw it and was immediately impressed –what a nice geode.

Unfortunately, there was a follow up comment from the store that sells this cake.

*At manager’s meeting on Monday*

“Well, once again we’ve underestimated our customer’s ability to see genitals in our baked goods. Let’s put that cute mushroom cake we had planned in the ‘do not make’ file.”

Now we could place the blame on the bakers’ lack of discernment, but I prefer to blame the customers, who clearly need to acquire a deeper appreciation of geology.

Also, as hard as I stare at the cake now, I just don’t see it — it looks nothing like a vagina. Maybe we also need to try harder to educate the public about basic human anatomy.

A work of prophecy!

A cartoonist in the 1920s predicted what would happen if we invented pocket telephones.

You are saying to yourself, “But he couldn’t imagine people inventing an off switch?”, to which I reply “Maybe he’s also predicting people’s inability or unwillingness to learn how to use the off switch,” which makes this a double prophecy. I may have to start worshipping W.K. Haselden, the creator of the cartoon.

Eagles & Patriots fans: watch your behavior if you’re in Minneapolis this weekend

The Superbowl is in Minneapolis this weekend, and I’m happy to say I’m staying 150 miles away from that mess. Various outlets are busy trying to inform the influx of visitors about Minnesota culture, and this is one absolutely essential point.

Be ready to experience first-class passive aggression. If someone says your old school Ron Jaworski Eagles jersey is “interesting,” they are not a fan. If someone says, “I’m not mad,” they are, in fact, mad. If you get to a 4-way stop at roughly the same time as another driver(s), your best bet is to just abandon the car, get out, and walk to your destination, as who gets to go first will never be resolved by conventional means.

The 4-way stop thing? Totally true, unless one of the people was born out of state, like me, and exasperatedly cuts the friendly waving short and accelerates right on through. What they don’t say about the passive-aggressive stuff is that everyone is going to be very polite to all these East Coast people, but deep down…they hate them. Especially the Philadelphians. No, wait, especially the Pats fans. We hate them with a white hot passion. They will be boorish and crude and impolite, and all the natives will be seething inside, regretting that they left their Viking axes at home, or there would be some churls waking up in Hel with their brains draping their shoulders, I tell you what.

Jon Del Arroz tries so hard to promote himself

Jon Del Arroz bubbled up in my news again — you may remember him as the self-aggrandizing fellow who bills himself as the “Leading Hispanic Voice in Science Fiction” and who last rose to my attention as yet another rabid puppy whimpering about SJWs with made-up statistics and bad analyses. He’s making noise again, not for the excellence of his writing, but because he had his membership to WorldCon revoked.Oops. It’s hard to lead from the rubbish bin.

But his complaining provoked Jim Hines to catalog all the reasons he was banned. That’s going to leave a mark. I can’t say that I’m sorry to see an anti-feminist, anti-social justice friend of Vox Day get a public spanking, but it’s kind of sad to see someone who works so dang hard at self-promotion accomplish the reverse of what he intended.