It’s been a little while since I last brought up Pinkoski, so maybe you can handle another dollop. When I got his creationism comic book, I also picked up another, titled “Christian SF”, which promised to be the first in a series of comics containing science fiction stories with Christian themes.
Oh, it is bad.
Ignoring the Christian content completely, it is a major rip-off. It contains all of two stories, each given only 3 or four pages, which barely set up the premise and then stop cold, telling you to buy Christian SF #2 to find out what happens.
The first is titled “Who is the model citizen”, and consists of a few pages of exposition about terrorist attacks on the US requiring new weapons, and then the unveiling of a humanoid robot. That’s it.
The second, “The aliens”, sets the stage with some alien worlds where everyone is perfect and happy and worships God, when another alien shows up and announces that there has been a “great non-friendliness among the beings that serve the great I AM”, and that part of the Milky Way has been declared off-limits. Again, it just ends there.
As science fiction and as story telling, this thing just plain sucks. It’s got a few pages of the beginnings of some very lame stories, and everything in between is evangelical Christian babbling…and that’s where you’ll find the real science fiction. I haven’t seen such bizarre theology since I caught a glimpse of premillennial dispensationalism—what is it about the crazed Christian extremists that they can simultaneously declare their belief in literal biblical fundamentalism while indulging in the most fantastic distortions of the book itself?
For instance, here’s how Pinkoski explains the Christian Trinity.
That’s a picture of God, you see, and those things peeling off of his arms are the Holy Ghost, on the left, and Jesus, on the right. Literally. I’ve always thought the concept of the Trinity is a fine example of nonsensical theological babble, but you really haven’t seen anything until you’ve seen a True Believer try to illustrate it. Notice those little boxes surrounding the big hippie calving off a pair of little hippies? Those contain Pinkoski’s explanation of what’s going on, and they are a freakin’ trip, man.
Do you know how an amoeba reproduces? It splits itself into two amoebas, and the are made of the very same material—it’s a process called “mitosis”…
Uh, that’s right, kids: Pinkoski just explained the Trinity as the result of God undergoing mitosis, just like an amoeba. I couldn’t make this up if I tried.
If the theocrats ever get what they want and turn America into a Christian Dominion, I’ve got bad news for Pinkoski: he’s going to be among the first tied to a stake. Heretics are never popular in a theological monoculture, you know.
In the Beginning there was only GOD—and GOD knew the End from the Beginning, so that we might say “an eternity of planning” went into the thoughts that GOD used to plan the details of the Universe…
Long before the Beginning of the Universe the Great I AM decided on His form—and just as he gave Himself two arms that extended outward that became hands with five fingers, the Great I AM decided it was necessary to split himself into three Beings, three separate and distinct beings who were to perform different functions within the Universe that was about to be created…
Seeing the story of the Trinity laid out so literally sure makes it look silly, doesn’t it? It’s as absurd as those old myths about Athena being born from the forehead of Zeus.
At a later point in Time on the planet Earth, Satan would fabricate a story about a false god named “Zeus” who created a pantheon of other gods by having them grow out of his forehead and shoulders, etc., in an attempt to mock the truth about the real GOD…
Athena popping out of the head of Zeus is nonsense, of course, but Jesus sprouting out of the shoulder of God? That’s just the real truth.
The portion of the Great I AM who came from the right was to be known to mankind as the Son of God, and the portion of the Great I AM that was to be known as the invisible Holy Spirit came from the left side of the Great I AM (as if anything is truly invisible to God)…
I’m puzzled about the emphasis on the invisibility of the Holy Ghost. It’s not as if God and Jesus are somehow less invisible—I can’t see any of them.
Pinkoski is so specific and weird. Is there anything in the Bible about any of this? In the same patented move he pulled off in the last book, though, he seems to find vindication in trivial observations. Just as the existence of pygmies and dwarfs “proves” that biblical accounts of giants are true, so too does the prevalence of handedness support his theology.
In the world of mankind most people use their right hands to do physical tasks—a phenomenon that may be based upon the Great I AM using the right side portion of Himself to create the entire Universe…
He goes on in this same vein for a few more pages. I’ll spare you most of it. Here’s God and his two little buddies cruising through the Void and creating the Universe:
He does present us with another revelation: God’s physical location.
Where would be GOD’s home within the new Universe?
It would be called “The Third Heaven”—and would be within the place that would one day be named The ORION NEBULA…
The ORION NEBULA is a very unique sight in the night sky from Earth—for there is an awesome brilliance that shines outward from around the corner of The ORION NEBULA…
That brilliance is the GLORY OF GOD!
I say…What??? That’s just bizarre, but I guess I’ll go along. Whenever I see thinly dispersed clouds of expanding vapor in a vacuum, I think of God, too.