Ellwood City–No Atheists Allowed.

On the lawn at Ellwood City
Such a pity, such a pity,
That the mayor should be an idiot, and ignorant of law
Though he doesn’t see a danger
Showing Jesus in the manger
If a sign appeals to reason, he can see the fatal flaw
See, the laws of our great nation
Build a wall of separation
So endorsing a religion is a step we must not take
And Mayor Tony Court, his honor,
Knows the “reason” sign’s a goner—
He’ll reject the application, for the constitution’s sake!
We can show the birth of Jesus
Without worry, if it please us,
After all, it’s only Jesus, not some Christian Holy writ
Jesus’ birth is universal
So there’s no need for reversal
Since it’s representing everyone, there’s none who doesn’t fit!
But a sign promoting reason
In this holiest of seasons
Is a First Amendment no-no; it establishes a stance.
“Use your brains” is violation
Of our country’s firm foundation
Since it isn’t true for everyone, it doesn’t stand a chance!

You won’t believe the real story, but it’s just below the jump:

If you’re visiting Ellwood City, PA, this winter, you’ll find a Nativity Scene, a Menorah, a Kwanzaa poster, a christmas tree, Santa, reindeer… what you won’t find is the contribution of the local Freedom From Religion Foundation. They submitted a banner reminding us that “[religion is] myth and superstition that hardens hearts and enslaves minds”.

Mayor Anthony Court saw through it, of course. Such a message would violate the establishment clause, unlike the displays of Joseph, Mary, and Jesus:

“I believe [the banner] violates the First Amendment. It’s endorsing atheism,” the mayor said. The creche “is a statue. It’s not a doctrinal statement.”

It’s clearly endorsing atheism; no religious believer could possibly agree with it, aside from those who do. Whereas, people of all faiths and of none agree that a depiction of Christ’s birth is a non-denominational expression of … something.

The mayor sees Jesus as representing christians, muslims, and jews (ok, it really doesn’t seem like he cares if Jesus represents atheists). I wonder if they agree. And of course, the mayor has protected his flock from any insinuation that they might be willing to listen to… reason.


  1. says

    Don’t these people see how much more like the Taliban than Americans they are? Sometimes I feel like my 20 years defending the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic was wasted looking outside our borders…

  2. Brownian says

    Don’t these people see how much more like the Taliban than Americans they are?

    There’s something question-begging about that.

  3. F says

    The pellet with the poison’s in the vessel with the pestle, the chalice from the palace has the brew that is true.

    For some reason.

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