The Trump Surrogate

He’s razor-sharp, or even keener,
Calm and cool is his demeanor;
Ranting “Neener, neener, neener!”
Never was his style;
Poised and thoughtful, his debating,
Never stoops to low berating,
Turns aside barbaric hating
Merely with a smile.
Logic is the tool he uses,
Striking when and where he chooses;
Quick and strong, he never loses–
Always wins the prize;
Ready for a rough-and-tumble
Sure of foot; he’ll never stumble.
Through it all, remaining humble…
Problem is, he lies. [Read more…]

Unshackled (A Trumped-Up Sepielle)

This race might be one that’s best tackled unshackled—

Unchain me, you losers, and let me fly free!
I think I might surge without Ryan—I’m tryin’;
The best course of action is “Let Me Be Me!”
We don’t need to mention how racist my base is,
Or how xenophobic I am on the stump
It’s anti-establishment voting I’m noting
And no one can play the outsider like Trump! [Read more…]

False Balance (or, Fun With Amphibrachs!)

Political writing is hard to decipher;
It’s taking some effort—I’m trying!
I note the gymnastics reporters engage in,
Avoiding the phrase “Trump is lying”
They try to play fair; it’s a hopeless endeavor:
“He misrepresents what she’s saying”
The proper translation of Trump’s elocution:
“The Tangerine Jackass is braying!”
Reporters are fighting reflexive defenses—
Which, frequently, Trump can elicit—
But really, his lies need near constant addressing;
By ducking, the press are complicit! [Read more…]