Every super hero in good standing has a sidekick! You will need to begin thinking of one. The loyal Dr. Sugarcane making discoveries in her lab? Pineapple’s devoted horse, Popsicle? Pineapple’s loyal back-up team, Las Guavas?
@DearAnia #7 – I would love to see the whole FTB crew turned into superhero/as. The League of Freethought Bloggers, fighters for Truth, Justice and the Secular Way!
Now I’m wishing I had been more vocal in the comments! Because I want to be one of the Masked Pineapple’s minions too! Maybe you could draw the rest of us as an anonymous horde — fruit-flavored flying monkeys or something.
Mostly cylindrical, filled with gas, and makes you laugh. That’s me.
In that case, I need to stop procrastinating and get in line! I’ve been told that whippits also make my voice sound like Tallulah Bankhead addressing the Junior League, and I could use more of that in my life.
Pussy whippets would be the most chibi magical pets in the universe, half puppy, half kitten, with super speed and the ability to turn the toughest supervillain into baby-talking wibbly mush with the power of sheer cute!
Ophelia Benson is a columnist for Free Inquiry and the co-author of The Dictionary of Fashionable Nonsense, Why Truth Matters, and Does God Hate Women?
20 comments
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Bjarte Foshaug
March 4, 2013 at 11:57 am (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Wow, that sure beats my stick figure
Ophelia Benson
March 4, 2013 at 12:00 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Don’t say mean things about my dear friend the stick figure now!
Aratina Cage
March 4, 2013 at 12:34 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Awesome new comic book superhero and a great motto to go along with her, too!
UnknownEric is just a spudboy, looking for a quantum tomato.
March 4, 2013 at 12:47 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Fighting against the ineffectual supervillains The Legion of Slyme!
jackiepaper
March 4, 2013 at 12:50 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
She battles alongside Mangina and his faithful companion Pussywhippet, right?
Claire Ramsey
March 4, 2013 at 12:56 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
hahahahahahaha!!!!
hahahahahahahahaha!!!
Every super hero in good standing has a sidekick! You will need to begin thinking of one. The loyal Dr. Sugarcane making discoveries in her lab? Pineapple’s devoted horse, Popsicle? Pineapple’s loyal back-up team, Las Guavas?
The Masked Pineapple is excellent!!
DearAnia
March 4, 2013 at 1:02 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
#5 Oh sweet tits of the FSM, I must make Mangina and Pussy whippet now xD
This is going to end with me making a whole cast of super heroes isn’t it?
Stephanie Zvan
March 4, 2013 at 1:05 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
DearAnia, is it wrong of me to hope so?
DearAnia
March 4, 2013 at 1:15 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Stephanie: Not at all. Have a character preference?
Gregory in Seattle
March 4, 2013 at 1:27 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
@DearAnia #7 – I would love to see the whole FTB crew turned into superhero/as. The League of Freethought Bloggers, fighters for Truth, Justice and the Secular Way!
Anthony K
March 4, 2013 at 1:42 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
I want to be one of the whippits.
(Note: whippit, not whippet.)
Mostly cylindrical, filled with gas, and makes you laugh. That’s me.
Peter N
March 4, 2013 at 1:53 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Now I’m wishing I had been more vocal in the comments! Because I want to be one of the Masked Pineapple’s minions too! Maybe you could draw the rest of us as an anonymous horde — fruit-flavored flying monkeys or something.
athyco
March 4, 2013 at 2:05 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
In that case, I need to stop procrastinating and get in line! I’ve been told that whippits also make my voice sound like Tallulah Bankhead addressing the Junior League, and I could use more of that in my life.
DearAnia
March 4, 2013 at 2:39 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
xD Have pity on me? I am supposed to be writing a book!
jmb
March 4, 2013 at 2:40 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Pussy whippets would be the most chibi magical pets in the universe, half puppy, half kitten, with super speed and the ability to turn the toughest supervillain into baby-talking wibbly mush with the power of sheer cute!
Stacy
March 4, 2013 at 2:46 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Is her alter ego a mild mannered barmaid in a cosmic alehouse?
Alethea H. "Crocoduck" Kuiper-Belt
March 4, 2013 at 3:28 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Yes, Stacy. Yes it is.
I bags Bananana Dackry for my sidekick name.
Malachite
March 4, 2013 at 4:48 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
Brilliant! I love it!
EllenBeth Wachs
March 4, 2013 at 5:14 pm (UTC -7) Link to this comment
And who gets the last laugh? LOVE!
Jadehawk
March 5, 2013 at 9:36 am (UTC -7) Link to this comment
I can’t believe I didn’t think about linking to this earlier, because funny and fitting: Pineapple Song from Cabaret : )