A poll for Republican Jesus

In the Bible, Jesus spoke clearly on the spiritual mandate that all people of any means must heal the sick, feed the hungry, empower the powerless. A reasonable person might then conclude that a majority Christian government of the people, by the people, and for the people would reflect those sacred directives. And for the most part, people do. But few Republicans agree:

Salon — Eighty percent of Democrats and 52 percent of independents said Jesus would support universal healthcare. Indeed it’s hard to imagine Jesus would deny care to those who lack the financial means to enjoy the comfort of our for-profit capitalist healthcare industry. But that’s not the Jesus Republicans know. Only 23 percent of Republicans believe Jesus would support healthcare for all.

“It’s easier for a camel to walk through the eye of a needle than it is for a rich man to enter Heaven,” forewarned Jesus. The credo of the Beatitudes demonstrated Jesus saw the world in terms of class struggle. “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are the meek, for they shall possess the earth.”

But only 18 percent of Republicans believe Jesus would support higher taxes on the rich; taxes that benefit the funding of the common good – schools, hospitals, and safety nets for those the capitalist machine leaves downtrodden. (Sixty-three percent of Democrats believe Jesus would support raising taxes on the rich.)

The numbers from Obamacare and the Fed are clear: despite GOP efforts to hobble every common sense initiative, affordable healthcare is working better than expected and June boasted the first budget surplus in many years. But among Republicans and especially Tea Part conservatives, discredited ideas about cutting taxes on the rich or the ACA hurting jobs and growth are still rampant. It’s more like a religion than a political ideology.

Daily Beast — Consequently, on the issues of government, economics, race, and sex, the Tea Party promulgates a doctrine to which the faithful must subscribe. Democrats and independents who oppose their dogma are infidels. Republicans who don’t obey all the tenants are heretics, who are primaried rather than burned at the stake.

Like all revealed religions this one has its own Devil in the form of Barack Obama. This Antichrist in the White House is an illegitimate ruler who must be opposed at every turn, along with his lesser demons, Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi. They are responsible for everything that has gone wrong with the country in the last six years and indeed, they represent a liberal legacy that has betrayed America’s ideals for the better part of a century.

They’re not zombie lies, so much as revelation that cannot be questioned, only failed by traitors and demons hoodwinking the weak and stupid, proving only the strong, loyal, or wealthy faithful are worthy of salvation.


  1. StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return! says

    Bill Maher is awesome and spot on here. I know he has his critics on FTB and elsewhere (and fair enough too) and isn’t perfect but, well, see the first sentence – and watch that clip.

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