Herman Cain blames Satan


Herman Cain, a blast from the past. Another over-paid pampered CEO whose ego grew so huge he thought he could really be President. Cain was never going anywhere of course, but don’t think for a second he knew that, far from it. These clowns have way more faith in themselves than your average non-pathological person would imagine. But what brief intersection Cain had with that fantasy was cut short by multiple allegations he was a hound. Now, Herman Cain knows who to blame:

Real Clear Religion — Then he speculated as to who may have orchestrated the allegations: the Devil. “It made me realize that there was a force bigger than right,” Cain said.

But that doesn’t mean Cain has given up. Nowadays, Cain fights against the Evil One from the pulpit. Cain has been a member of the same Baptist church in Atlanta — “a church in the hood” — since he was 10, where he now serves as an associate pastor. Cain preaches that the Devil is “determined to destroy our culture” and that “the family is at the center of our culture and the center of the family is its religious beliefs.”

The devil is such a ridiculous figure in Abrahamic theology that even as a third-grader who liked stories about ancient aliens and yetis, I knew it was bogus. Cain might know that too, but either way it won’t stop him from using it to scare his hard-working neighbors into voting against their own interests so that billionaires can have a few more bucks.


  1. cheesynougats says

    I don’t know; I like the original Jewish concept of Satan. In the earlier texts, Yahweh was seated in the throne, the Son of Man (Elijah, IIRC) was on his right, and Satan was on his left. Elijah’s job was to assist Yahweh in his duties, while Satan argued against Yahweh. Both were subservient to him, and together they ran things. It wasn’t until after the Jews met the Persians with their Zoroastrian concept of one entirely good deity and one entirely evil that the more modern view of Satan arose.

    I am not a historian, so all of this could be wrong. Still, it makes a better story than the modern interpretation of Satan. I could definitely get behind the guy who’s constantly arguing against the status quo.

  2. anubisprime says


    “It made me realize that there was a force bigger than right,”

    Yahwey better pack up shop, ship out and hang his scraggy derrière on the peg on the way out…!

  3. busterggi says

    Until believers can explain why an all-loving god would create an all evil slightly lesser god and do so in a way that makes sense I’ll continue to disbelieve.

  4. StevoR : Free West Papua, free Tibet, let the Chagossians return! says

    Everyone always blames Satan for things, isn’t it time he got a bit of credit? ;-)

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