The Roman emperor Caligula threatened to make his favorite horse, Incitatus, a consul. Historians agree he didn’t actually accomplish that, it was more of a demeaning joke against the aristocracy and a way to brag about his power, but still…that’s one of the many stupid, hateful things we remember him for. Caligula has not fared well in history. Historians can argue down to this day that Caligula was the worst Roman emperor of all time, for his capriciousness, his venality, his narcissism, his greed, his ineffectiveness as a leader.

Does that sound familiar?

At least Trump has actually done the thing he claimed he was going to do: he has signed an Executive Order declaring that Lake Ontario is to be renamed Lake America.

resident Donald Trump on Thursday signed an ‌Executive Order instructing Interior Secretary Doug Burgum to rename Lake Ontario as “Lake America.” ​

The change is set to take effect immediately, he said. Trump earlier in the week had floated the idea of a new moniker for the lake, which borders the Canadian ‌province ⁠of Ontario and the U.S. state of New York.

It is absurd. Not only is it not going to happen, but it also highlights the fact that Executive Orders as a tool for governing have been corrupted and are totally useless. No one except brain-dead MAGA clowns are going to call it “Lake America”.

“The name is more than 400 years old, pre-dating both the Confederation of Canada and the Declaration of Independence of the United States of America,” said Carney on Thursday. “We know that America is changing. Their trading relationships, their foreign policies, their national monuments, their hydronyms.”

Insisting that Canadians are aware of the “naming reality,” Carney rejected Trump’s directive for the lake, which borders the Canadian ‌province ⁠of Ontario and the U.S. state of New York.

The governor of New York, Kathy Hochul, has also rejected the whole idea.

History and the world are going to be laughing at our idiot president for a long time to come. You might say that at least he hasn’t put a horse in the Senate, but I think a lot of the candidates he has endorsed, and all of the nitwits in his cabinet, would serve us better if they were horses. Put Burgum in harness and run him in the Kentucky Derby, he’d be more useful there than as Secretary of the Interior.

The Mike Lindell saga in Minnesota is over. He had been throwing his familiar temper tantrum over losing the primary election, which is his right, and it was also his right to demand a recount, if he was willing to pay for it.

He was not willing to pay for it.

Lindell failed to formally request and pay for a recount by a Monday deadline. He went to the high court to seek a more-expansive recount than a state-approved plan. He objected to the structure in which only votes for him and Lisa Demuth would be counted by name and all others would be combined in a third pile.

Therefore, it is settled: Lindell lost. The election for governor in November will be between Demuth and Klobuchar. Lindell can go cry into his pillows.

The evidence is in. We liberal professors are doing a bad job at indoctrination — it’s not our hard work that is persuading students, we’re just coasting on a general trend that education liberalizes.

We study whether Democratic college professors make their students more liberal. We link voter data to salary records from 33 state flagships and show that faculty skew Democratic, especially in the humanities and social sciences. We then use student transcripts from one flagship to estimate causal effects. Students become more liberal during college regardless of major and sort toward ideologically similar instructors. Exploiting plausibly random variation in when instructors teach courses, we find no effect of faculty partisanship on student partisanship. Text analysis shows exposure to liberal topics reflects student demand rather than instructor supply, leaving little room for indoctrination.

Damn. Are the Democrats going to cut my Professional Indoctrinator stipend now? I’ve been saying for years that I don’t teach political perspectives in my classes, but nobody believed me, and they kept passing those big checks to me.

Remember this?

A video circulating widely on social media Sunday appears to show President Donald Trump announcing that the United States will buy Argentine beef while dismissing concerns about struggling American farmers.

He had a plan. Meat prices were climbing fast, so he thought he’d pander to consumers (but not beef producers) by importing 15 tons of cheap Argentine beef. And he did, and he distributed it to his most devoted followers in Florida and Texas.

How’s that going?

Nearly 30,000 pounds of raw beef have been recalled at the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s (USDA) highest warning level due to an import violation.

Corte Argentino USA LLC, a Florida-based beef company, recalled approximately 29,628 pounds of raw beef imported to the U.S. from Argentina without reinspection, according to an announcement from the USDA Food Safety and Inspection Service (FSIS) on Aug. 7.

The agency classified the recall as Class I, meaning that it’s a “high or medium risk” recall entailing “a health hazard situation” with “a reasonable probability that the use of the product will cause serious, adverse health consequences or death,” per the FSIS.

As a vegetarian living in a state that hates Donald Trump and will never receive his toxic largesse, I can laugh. While eating my cyclospora-infested produce.

We can’t win.

We wouldn’t have these problems. Everyone has to see that Trump is insane, right?

He’s picking a trade war with Canada, our ally and partner. <a href=”https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/national-international/trump-lake-ontario-lake-america-name-change-trade-war-canada-escalates/6539930>Canada is retaliating. We’re going to feel it in the form of toilet paper shortages soon. If he doesn’t get his way, he’s threatening to demolish the Kennedy Center — and he’ll do it, just like he tore down the East Wing. Most petty of all, he threatens to rename Lake Ontario to Lake America. Since when does the US president have authority over geography? He doesn’t.

These events are just the latest in his history of idiotic, self-defeating policy decisions by an incompetent bully. When will it become obvious to the other branches of the so-called distributed balance of federal power? Oh, wait, they know. The Senate and Supreme Court are enabling it.

But we really have to blame the American voter. Latest example: they’ve made Darline Graham* the Republican nominee to replace her dead brother. She’s not qualified. Her only ‘virtue’ is blood, and she got elected solely because she’s a member of the tribe. That tribal thinking is what’s going to get more Republicans elected in November.

We are so screwed.

*My mother’s name was Darlene, with an “e”. I’m not happy to see it dragged through the news attached to that smooth-brained Southern dingleberry.