Mary’s first project this morning was to put on all black clothes, and refresh the fat and meat hanging decoratively from our trees. I’m beginning to wonder if she is actually an atheist, like she says.
Right away, those weird winged spiders swooped in to worship the dark lady of pig guts.
Life is back to normal at my house.
OKAY…
I put up the bird feeder, but I only use sunflower seeds and occasionally some vegetable fat…
Y’ know, you really shouldn’t let your mrs. mess with the forces of evolution like that. How are these birds supposed to evolve into strong, self-sufficient critters if you keep giving them handouts? What happens when you run out of guts?
They’ll be coming around looking for freebies because they’ve forgotten how to forage on their own, only to be let down. What if they turn into a flock of angry birds and start trying to peck their way into your home, where you and your family are cowering in fear and whimpering “Where did we go wrong?” And what if the spiders join the insurrection? Man, that’s a grizzly way to go. The law of unintended consequences…, or as they say, no good deed goes unpunished!
I think they might be dinosaurs rather than spiders.