Pete Hegseth has decreed that there are only 31 religions that will be officially recognized by the US military, in an effort to pare down and streamline the efficiency of their administration. Of the 31, 22 are hair-splitting variants of the Christian cult, which to my mind suggests that there are greater efficiencies to be achieved, if only this policy were administered by someone who doesn’t have Crusader tattoos all over his body, and isn’t a member of Doug Wilson’s white nationalist church.
But surprise, surprise, surprise, guess who is left off the list?
This restructuring of faith codes, which help identify service members as well as the military in planning for appropriated religious coverage to include them, has now excluded minority faith/worldview groups including Atheists, Asatru, Deists, Druids, Eckankar, Heathens, Humanists, Magick, New Age churches, Pagan, Rosicrucianism, Shaman, Spiritualists, Troth, Unitarian Universalists and various Wiccans.
I guess some of the founding fathers of this country, the ones who were Unitarians and deists, wouldn’t get any respect from our modern military. The ones who owned slaves would probably fit right in.
Hey, did I lose my audience with an ancient Gomer Pyle reference? I am old.
“Hey, did I lose my audience with an ancient Gomer Pyle reference? I am old.”
At least one person in your audience is old enough to think you are still young.
I never knew that Magick (the gathering) was considered a religion, but guess I should have.
The actual term “atheist” was removed, but “no religion” is still there, so this is minor from our perspective. Everyone who gets lumped into “Other Religion” and told that this is somehow to help them get “targeted religious support from the Chaplaincy” is in a much stronger position to complain. The ridiculous pile of variants for Christianity also really stands out relative to other religions; if baptist, Pentecostal, and evangelical are somehow distinct categories Sunni and Shia being lumped together has to sting.
I always watched Gomer.
Knabb @ 3
Spiritual but not religious would be considered No Religion too. It completely erases open atheists from the military. It’s not “minor”.
Whoa, this totally breaks my Noodle, blessed be he!
Pastafarians are NOT on the Do Not Pray list!
Praise be to his Exalted Holiness, the Flying Spaghetti Monster and the Noodley Host!
Ramen!
Now I’m just imagining a parallel world where Christians, Jews, and Muslims all get lumped under “Abrahamic faiths” while some other ascendant religion gets all its denominations respected.
Callng atheism a religion is like calling being healthy a disease…. so they at least got one thing right. Sadly, one can’t hope they don’t keep everyone but the “no religion” folks away from the guns.
Christians shouldn’t need a military anyway. Just find another true believer and pray at the enemy. Hypocrits
So it’s just the old Emo Philips joke all over again?
It should be easy to figure which religions should still be on the list. If a religions adherents hate and despise the adherents of other religions to the point where they’d slaughter each other for centuries, they obviously could never stand worshipping together. Hence, separate services would be necessary.
So, if i understood this correctly, it is allowed to worship the aztec pantheon, and bring to the frontlines a drum made of human skin, making “music” to inspire the soldiers?
Somehow, this doesn’t surprise me…
Given Sec. Hegseth’s overt devotion to “lethality”, the Department of War clearly needs to recognize Ares/Mars-ism, Thuggee, Mithraism, Molochism, or some other representation of Necrolatry.
@ ^ Pierce R. Butler : Sauronism.
Or Trumpism. Or Fascism. But I repeat myself. Same diff. In essence.
So, now the murderous magat administration, embodied in crusader pigseth, is also targeting people who don’t believe in the ‘pedophile approving sky fairy’? Everywhere I look responsible reports keep emphasizing, with FACTS, that this entire nation is becoming a ‘xtian terrorist magat billionaire owned trailer trash empire’.
Lumping us rational atheists (and maybe humanists and unitarian universalists, which are mostly benign and marginally superstitious) in with all the other crackpot superstitious religions is an ignorant insult.
Bobby Henderson had a great idea to combat the xtian terrorist regime in the kansas school system when he creating the Flying Spaghetti Monster church. I have to grant some respect to him and his pastafarians.
@ ^ shermanj : Ramen!
By definition, to be in a foxhole is to rely for salvation on physics to avoid attack, instead of relying on a deity. Thus, everyone in a foxhole is an atheist, and believers are apparently trying to leave the military by unaliving themselves. There are no sincere theists in foxholes, so all theists are unfit for military duty and should be dismissed. That’s just logic. So all military chaplains should be versions of atheists only.
By definition, to be in a foxhole is to rely for salvation on physics to avoid attack, instead of relying on a deity. Thus, everyone in a foxhole is an atheist, and believers are apparently trying to leave the military by unaliving themselves. There are no sincere theists in foxholes, so all theists are unfit for military duty and should be dismissed. That’s just logic. So all military chaplains should be versions of atheists only.
Yog-Sototh is the opener of ways, so if you pray to him for a way to get out of encirclement would be a very military- relevant religion.
.
BTW we know Pigseth has blocked a disproportionate number of black and women servicemembers from promotion. Is he basing this on some old-testament bible verse.
Meh. I don’t see the problem.
It’s supposed to be the military, not a church.
And atheists don’t need any of it.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_symbolism_in_the_United_States_military
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Religious symbolism in the United States military includes the use of religious symbols for military chaplain insignia, uniforms, emblems, flags, and chapels; symbolic gestures, actions, and words used in military rituals and ceremonies; and religious symbols or designations used in areas such as headstones and markers in national cemeteries, and military ID tags (“dog tags”).
Symbolism sometimes includes specific images included or excluded because of religious reasons, choices involving colors with religious significance, and “religious accommodation” policies regarding the wear of “religious apparel” and “grooming” (such as “unshorn” hair and beards worn for religious reasons) with military uniforms. Additionally, military chaplains themselves are sometimes regarded as “symbols of faith” for military personnel who face challenges to their faith and values.[1]
Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth announced on March 24, 2026 that chaplains in all military branches would cease wearing insignia of grade and only wear their religious insignia.[2]
Gomer Pyle-USMC a little before my time. However, as a kid, the local UHF TV stations played plenty of synchronized re-runs along with The Andy Griffith Show. Never watched it because it wasn’t my thing, but I got the reference.
The entire list of excluded groups reads like a who’s-who of Bible-fucker boggeyfoks: atheists, pagans, Wiccans, and anyone else that doesn’t embrace trinitarian Christianity. I’m surprised Muslims weren’t excluded as well. Agnostics probably get a free ride because they are open to the idea that the Christian magical cosmic tyrant might exist.
@19 Bruce, “So all military chaplains should be versions of atheists only.”
No, you also need chaplains for the non-atheists not-in-foxholes. Those who think god will save them as they rush into machine gun fire… These chaplains have a tough job…
Although there were in slit trenches according to James Jones.
Comrade Pete has failed: Russian Orthodox is not on list. Just “Orthodox” is not clear enough, could be Greek Orthodox or Ethiopian Orthodox. Comrade Vlad is not pleased and will send detailed specifications at later date.
Some of us who had responsibility for sending real, live people Over There in 1990 — with real potential “need” for final services — are having really serious flashbacks without the benefit of any psychotropics. (Mine said “no religion” because that’s what was offered.)