So where do you live?

I’m in “Snow-Covered Moonscape”, on the fringes of “Nightmare Tornado Zone”, and I grew up in “Year Round Depression”.

Actually, it only feels moonscapey when it’s late March and you’re still digging out from under the last batch of snow. And “Year Round Depression” wasn’t as bad as people make it out to be — gray skies and moderate temperatures are quite soothing.

You couldn’t pay me enough to live in “Air Made of Hot Soup.”


  1. UnknownEric the Apostate says

    On the other hand, The Mystery Belt sounds awesome. Is it like Gravity Falls?

  2. says

    As someone technically living in the adjacent area north of the border, I must object. ‘Snow-covered moonscape’ hardly tells the whole story.

    … Insofar as there is also the summer. Featuring black, turbulent clouds of bloodsucking insects.

  3. davidnangle says

    “You couldn’t pay me enough to live in “Air Made of Hot Soup.”

    It’s not the heated soup… it’s the so-called morality.

  4. opposablethumbs says

    Wow, makes me quite glad I only live in Mostly Grey Drizzle While Still Somehow Managing to be Always Unexpectedly Changeable country, over the pond.

  5. petemoulton says

    Definitely in the “On Fire” zone, but considering I moved here from the boundary between the “Snow-covered Moonscape” and the “Nightmare Tornado Zone,” aka eastern Colorado, I’ll take it.

  6. says

    I live in “On Fire,” but spent a lot of growing-up years in “Bears Only.” I prefer “On Fire” to “Air Made of Hot Soup.”

  7. footface says

    I love Seattle weather. The five-month run of gray drizzle *is* soothing. The only problem is that now I can’t handle temperatures above 70°F.

  8. cicely says

    I was raised in southern The Flipping Ground Moves Also (before it merged with other parts to form the On Fire region), and now live in Nightmare Tornado Zone.

  9. Pierce R. Butler says

    Greetings from the Hurricane Terror Area, where we also get Air Made of Hot Soup, Nightmare Tornadoes, Fire, and – lotsa – Mysteries.

    We have to bring in bulldozers for our moonscapes (the present Fla Governor is big on that!), but have too many manic episodes to qualify for year-round depression.

  10. magistramarla says

    I grew up in the overlap between snow-covered moonscape and nightmare tornado zone.
    We now live in the air made of hot soup zone, and it is an awful place to live.
    Note: All of California is NOT on fire. If one lives far enough north and near the coast, the combination of cool weather and ocean breezes is lovely.
    Also of note: We lived in CA for nearly four years and felt all of three mild tremors. My daughter and her husband were stationed in Arkansas for a couple of years and felt eight moderate tremors, thanks to fracking.
    I just returned to the US from a lovely tour of Europe, and I agree with opposablethumbs. I think that he/she is referring to Great Britain, and I truly loved the weather (and the hospitality) in the English countryside.
    Opposablethumbs- Will you adopt me?

  11. opposablethumbs says

    magistramarla, I take that as a very great compliment!
    And yes, I am indeed referring to Perfidious Albion.

  12. MattP (must mock his crappy brain) says

    Other than the culture, the biggest issue of the chunk of Air Made of Hot Soup not far from Hurricane Terror Area that I inhabit is that there are only two weather settings: Deep Fry and Freezer Burn. Luckily, Stone Mountain takes the wind out of the sails of most of the larger storms coming from the west, but send the storms from the south or east and we tend to become Nightmare Tornado Zone.

  13. twincats says

    Another native denizen of ‘on fire/the ground also moves’ land, here. I would go almost anywhere before I’d go back to ‘air made of hot soup’ land again.

    Also, ‘hurricane terror area’ should be part of ‘air made of hot soup’ the way ‘the ground also moves’ is a subset of ‘on fire’ because it’s basically a twofer as well.

    The best climate I ever experienced was in the Friuli region of Italy; a lot of cloudy/rainy weather in Winter and Spring with very mild temps in Summer/Fall. An 80F day was considered hot! It was two years of weather bliss courtesy of the USAF before they sent me off to the ‘nightmare tornado zone’ for a year and then the ‘hurricane terror area’ for nine months and then back to the tornado zone :( Turkey was more ‘on fire/the ground also moves’ land, so I felt right at home, climate-wise.

  14. anteprepro says


    I live in the Great Blank Space Above America.

    aka Moonscape 2: Electric Boogaloo

  15. says

    There is a postcard I’ve seen around in tourist shops. It is light gray at the top, which is labeled with SUMMER. Dark gray at the bottom, which is labeled WINTER. The sides fade from one to the other, and are labeled SPRING and AUTUMN. In the center of the postcard is “A year in Seattle.” That is what it is like in the heart of Year-Round Depression.

  16. says

    I moved to the Burlington, VT area last year from Phoenix, AZ. This is the first time I’ve felt ACTUAL cold — the first time I’ve felt any sort of freezing temp. “Well, it’s negative 20 out. Now I know what that feels like! Cold. It feels cold.”

    And boy, was it cold. We barely got any snow, compared to most of the east coast (like, well under normal for us).

    I am no longer wearing a coat when it’s above freezing. WHAT HAVE I BECOME.

    But whatever, after years of 110+ degree summers, at this point, I’m happy with the change.

  17. Rich Roberts says

    Living in Southeaster Michigan, I also live in the “Snow-Covered Moonscape.” This time of year it’s also where old clouds go to die.

  18. Trebuchet says

    “Year-round depression” has been pretty nice all winter. And hit 75F yesterday, which is too dang warm for me.

  19. Who Cares says

    I live in the area that reads: How the hell does it have a climate it is supposed to be underwater.

  20. Nick Gotts says

    So where do you live?

    Yurp. Alternating between the whisky-and-deep-fried-everything, and pasta-and-Mafia subzones.

  21. blf says

    I spent a lot of time in Flipping Ground Movesland but am now in Strong Winds-near-Kraken part of Cheese Eating Frogland.

  22. trollofreason says

    I technically live in the always on fire bit, yet I totally disagree with this map as it doesn’t have a little zone marked out as, “the best weather on the planet, but full of rednecks” for the NorCal valley area.

  23. sceptinurse says

    I’m a native and still live in on fire/ground moves a lot although I did spend a year and a half in bears only.

  24. gillyc says

    Ah, opposablethumbs beat me too it. I’m in that bit of the England to the west of the Pennines, so mostly cloudy and/or rainy. I grew up on the north east coast of England, which is similar, but less rainy and more cold in winter. (Frost on the inside of the bedroom window kind of cold, in winter… central heating was not a thing when I was a kid, at least not for poor people.) Unfortunately I’m not feeling creative enough to think up cutesy names for those two areas.

  25. Die Anyway says

    Apparently not too many of us from the hurricane terror zone. And I hope no one else decides to move here, it’s too crowded already. I will say though, we’ve been in our current home near the Gulf Coast for 17 years and haven’t experienced a hurricane yet. We did live through Andrew but that was a different house on the other coast. And yes, there was a bit of terror involved in that experience.

  26. says

    Snow-covered moonscape, which is currently cold enough for snow, but does not actually have any snow, thanks to a few days of 40+°F weather we had last week and a lack of clouds. The tulips have pushed out of the ground and are probably regretting it and the grass is starting to green up just slightly, so we are disappointingly short of “moonscape” as well.

  27. Lofty says

    And on the other side of the planet we live smack bang in the middle of the Flaming Drop Bears Zone With Added Spiders And Other Bitey Things.

  28. twas brillig (stevem) says

    The first 9 yrs of my life were spent in Hurricane Terror Zone, and lived through (at least) 3 terror hurricanes. Even one right in the eye of said Terror. I remember (vaguely) one , where my dad drove our station wagon during the beginnings of one and put the car in neutral to let the wind push us along. My mom freaked and demanded it back into gear, “right now (!)”. One year, visited Dizzy World while Hurricane Andrew destroyed that suburb. I scolded them for not implementing the standard building code for hurricane protection: ensure the roof is firmly attached to the rafters of the building. Most other buildings count on the weight of the roof to hold it down to the frame, but hurricanes are a different matter.
    Now, I’m back in the Snow Covered Moonscape, still snow covered, after a brief (3 yr) “visit” On Fire.
    Much prefer Moonscape to Fire, and Terror.

  29. numerobis says


    I am no longer wearing a coat when it’s above freezing. WHAT HAVE I BECOME.

    Today was glorious, I was only slightly cold while walking to lunch in my thin soft-shell jacket and sandals, under light flurries. No tuque, no gloves! (It’s usually a tiny bit warmer up here though, so maybe you still needed a hat.)

  30. rwgate says

    Born and raised in the Year Round Depression, moved to the Mystery Belt in 1975, and to On Fire in 1994. Satan used to be my next door neighbor, but he moved out. Too hot for him. But hey, it’s supposed to be in the high 90’s all this week, no bugs, no hurricanes or earthquakes, and since this is Arizona, no clue.

  31. numerobis says

    Also: I disagree with the sharp delineations. From my experience, Pittsburgh and Chicago are snow-covered moonscapes in winter, it’s nightmare tornado zone in the late spring, and the air is made of soup in summer. I miss the big thunderstorms.

  32. Charlie Foxtrot says

    Like Lofty, I’m on the part of the map that I assume would be marked Other.
    In the Arse End Of The World hemisphere, in a small hamlet of only 3 and a bit million called Great Coffee, in the territories of Not Quite So Many Deadly Bitey Things, on the shores of Not Quite So Many Deadly Swimmy Things. Its quite nice, actually.

  33. says

    I live in the “on fire” west with the moving ground 50 miles south of San Francisco in the redwoods. With less than 50% normal rainfall for the last 4 years…. I hope redwoods don’t burn too easily. We’ve reduced our water consumption 40% since 2010. Probably not enough. Man this sucks.

  34. Brony, Social Justice Cenobite says

    My air is soup. But not so soupy as other places. Bigot soup too, but I found a nice spot on a piece of bread.

  35. mrcharlie says

    I was born and raised in the snow-covered moonscape. Once I finished grad school we moved to the northern part of On Fire. I agree with numerobis though, the sharp delineations are misleading. The weather I was happiest to leave wasn’t the cold winters but the ridiculously humid summers. Yes the ground does move a touch around here, but I’m old enough to remember earthquakes when I was sprout in the Midwest. Out here the winters are warmer, and the summers are cooler and much less humid. People complain when humidity rises above 50% on a warm day. I remember as a kid hoping it would get that low.

  36. sherylyoung says

    I choose to live in the Mystery belt and have been here nearly 30 years. I live in a valley that’s a hotbed of acceptance. Hooray for the Rocky Mountains!

  37. Onamission5 says

    I was born and raised in On Fire and Ground Also Moves, middle zone (that would be the mountainous norCal/S. OR region) but most recently fled Hurricane Terror Zone to breathe Hot Soup. I have to say though that it’s not nearly as soupy here in the mountains as it was in the zone of terror. MattP @16’s notation that Soup can quickly become Nightmare Tornadoes is quite accurate. Makes me sometimes miss the spontaneity of earthquakes.

  38. Dave, ex-Kwisatz Haderach says

    I also live in the track-less void north of On Fire, I guess. It was a gorgeous 23 degrees and sunny today, which is +++Divide By Cucumber Error+++ in American terms. I got my motorbike out of winter storage, it was grand.

  39. Lady Mondegreen says

    Born and raised in On Fire-The Flippin’ Ground Moves Also. I did spend a few years in Snow Covered Moonscape, but I missed the slippery fire.

  40. auntbenjy says

    @ Lofty #32

    And on the other side of the planet we live smack bang in the middle of the Flaming Drop Bears Zone With Added Spiders And Other Bitey Things.

    I live in the islands to the right of you, where we were wise enough to dump our poisonous, bitey things on you before splitting off. In the land of giant wetas, and birds that refuse to fly.

  41. Lofty says


    I live in the islands to the right of you, where we were wise enough to dump our poisonous, bitey things on you before splitting off. In the land of giant wetas, and birds that refuse to fly.

    Aah, that would be In The Frying Pan where the underground fire is Always On Simmer setting. Blup blup.

  42. Radioactive Elephant says

    Sadly, my part of the Hurricane Terror Area also has air made of hot soup. Hot chicken noodle soup.

  43. Grewgills says

    I’ve successfully avoided being on either side of murder living in the murder mountains.

  44. johnhodges says

    Mountains moderate. I live in the “mountains” of Virginia, the modest Appalachians, nothing like the Rockies. But our town is regularly five degrees (F) cooler than a nearby city in the foothills, and we get breezes. Because mountains, very few mosquitoes. We have had heat waves, but less than most other places; we have had “polar vortex” freezes, but they are brief. Humidity stays moderate, the air sheds it as it travels up the mountainsides. We have had one hurricane (Hugo?) pass through a few decades back, it blew down trees, but mostly hurricanes break apart before they get to us, We sometimes get heavy wind and/or rain, but otherwise weather is moderate enough to be OK, we do not suffer.

  45. neuroturtle says

    Grew up in the NTZ. Moonscape now, but spent the five years prior living in the section of Hot Soup that has more tornadoes than the Nightmare Tornado Zone. Quick flirtation with the Hurricane Terror Area – only stayed for two hurricanes, and somehow got a bonus earthquake out of the deal. Now I just need Fire and Volcanoes to finish out my Disaster Bingo.

  46. says

    I am residing in the land of grey overcast drizzle but come from the principality to the left in who’s native language is called “Forty Words For Rain”.

  47. Crimson Clupeidae says

    I’m currently relocating from the PNW “On fire” region, to the SW “On Fire” region, so I’m good.

    I’ve missed the desert. We’ve had some good rains this year in Az, and right now the spring flowers are amazing! (Not so good for the folks with allergies, as I understand it).