1. says

    There MIGHT be a way to avoid sounding like a misogynist here: just explain why you have a beef with this SaraKhanInspire person, without mentioning slapping or any other form of physical assault. It might sound nicer, depending on the exact nature of your complaint. Not sure why this dudebro didn’t think of that…

  2. Athywren, Social Justice Weretribble says

    Ok, I’ve got one!
    Wait, no, hear me out! Stop looking at me like that! O_O

    Ok, so, @SaraKhanInspire is at dinner and has just swallowed a piece of food that it significantly larger than is comfortable for the human esophagus, and begins to choke. @SaraKhanInspire deserves a slap… on the back to dislodge that oversized piece of food that is lodged in her esophagus!

    See? I did it and you stop looking at me like that… because it’s scary.

  3. theobromine says

    @Athywren: Well played.

    So: Is there a right way to disagree with someone in <140 characters without sounding like an asshat?

  4. bigwhale says

    Actually don’t slap a choking person on the back. If they are still coughing, let them cough. If they go silent or barely weezing, perform the Heimlich maneuver.

  5. Suido says


    The Heimlich manoeuvre is not recommended as first aid in Australia, as it often causes injuries and there are more effective ways to remove an obstruction. You’re right that back slaps should not be performed if the choking person is upright, as the blocking material may slip further down the windpipe.

    Instead, lean the person forwards and use the heel of your hand to hit between their shoulderblades up to 5 times, checking after each hit to see if it worked. If that doesn’t work, keep them in the same position, place a hand on their back for leverage, and perform the same action on their lower sternum.

    Repeat until fixed or they’re unconscious, in which case call emergency services and commence CPR.

  6. sonofrojblake says

    “Woman A deserves a slap” = “Man B deserves a slap”.

    Neither necessarily makes you sound misogynist or misandrist. The first one DOES make you sound misogynist if you’re a raging MRAsshat. The second one DOES make you sound misandrist if you’re a raging radfem. Context matters. In both those hypothetical cases, presumably one would not care that one’s statement was taken in that way.

    Both, however, make you sound like a violent arsehole.

  7. Anne Fenwick says

    JammyDodger was obviously hoping that the ‘just asking questions’ method of saying what he wants to say was going to work. No, sorry.

  8. says

    Is there a way to be blatantly misogynist without sounding misogynist?

    Hrm… Let’s see…

    No, I’m afraid… probably, no…

    But maybe if you were _also_ blatantly racist or something at the same time, and somehow even _more_ so, people might notice this first?

    (/Just Answering Questions.)

  9. Acolyte of Sagan says

    Well, yes, of course there’s a way, as long as ‘slap’ is followed by ‘-up meal’.

  10. Athywren, Social Justice Weretribble says

    @bigwhale, 6
    Hey, the brief was for it to sound “not like a misogynist,” not “in any way competent.” So I still count it as a victory against the forces of feminazism and other naughty-type people of totally real badness.

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