I have the evidence right here: there will exist, on 30 August in Minneapolis, a Cat video film festival. Right in my backyard, almost. It’s like they’re taunting me.

All right, God, this is your chance. If You exist, you will cause all those videos to spontaneously undergo radical bit-rot, and the conference will be over-run with arachnids, and it will rain squid from the skies. Pull that off, and I might acknowledge your existence. Otherwise, nope, you’re toast.