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Sep 12 2013

Put the devil back into hell

So the question is, has this guy in China been reading Boccaccio, or did Marco Polo bring this story to Italy?

A MAN who claimed he could use his penis to rid a woman of ghosts that had taken up residence in her vagina, was arrested in China after performing the “sexorcism” for which he charged $3,000.

Huang Jianjun was arrested in the Guangdong Province after he convinced A Xin that he could remove evil spirits from her vagina by having sexual intercourse. A day later, Xin reported the incident to the police, and Jianjun was promptly arrested.

It’s Alibech and Rustico – or Alibech and Rustico were originally A Xin and Huang Jianjun.

He began by eloquently showing how the devil is the enemy of the Lord God, and then gave her to understand that the service most pleasing to God is to put the devil back into hell, to which the Lord God has condemned him.

The girl asked how this was done, and Rustico replied:
“You shall soon know.  Do what you see me do.”
He then threw off the clothes he had and remained stark naked, and the girl imitated him.  He kneeled down as if to pray and made her kneel exactly opposite him. As he gazed at her beauty, Rustico’s desire became so great that the resurrection of the flesh occured.  Alibech looked at it with amazement, and said:
“Rustico, what is that thing I see sticking out in front of you which I haven’t got?”
“My daughter,” said Rustico, “That is the devil i spoke of.  Do you see? He gives me so much trouble at this moment that I can scarcely endure him.”
Said the girl:
“Praised be God!” I see I am better off than you are, since I haven’t such a devil.”
“You speak truly.” said Rustico, “but instead of this devil you have something else which I haven’t.”
“What’s that?” said Alibech.
“You’ve got hell,” replied Rustico, “and I believe God sent you here for the salvation of my soul, because this devil gives me great trouble, and if you will take pity upon me and let me put him into hell, you will give me the greatest comfort and at the same time will serve God and please him, since, as you say, you came here for that purpose.”

I love these cross-cultural influences, don’t you?

6 comments

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  1. 1
    Ace of Sevens

    I want to make a Ghostbusters joke, but I have this nagging suspicion it would be in poor taste.

  2. 2
    doublereed

    There are SO MANY JOKES that are in poor taste. I can’t choose between them.

  3. 3
    RainbowSlushie^.^

    You can’t make this stuff up, jesus, lol.

  4. 4
    Irène Delse, on dry land among seabirds

    Considering that Boccaccio used material that came ultimately from India and Arabia (that we know of), in addition to contemporary European authors and ancient Greek and Latin sources, I wouldn’t be floored by some Chinese stuff in there too.

    Also, the basic story element of a clever rogue having sex with someone’s wife under the guise of curing or exorcising her also turned up in Japanese popular tales. Who knows, maybe it’s only a matter of human minds thinking alike…

    BTW, I love “Put the devil back into hell”: what an evocative turn of phrase!

  5. 5
    Ichthyic

    Put the devil back into hell

    but, the poor guy just wanted to see what was “up there”

  6. 6
    Abdul Alhazred

    So the question is, has this guy in China been reading Boccaccio, or did Marco Polo bring this story to Italy?

    Independent invention of something “obvious”.

    Sort of like the boy with a hammer who sees all problems as nails.

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