If you’ve been missing the heady old days of creationists popping onto the blog to make outrageous claims, I smoked a few out in my last video. Here’s one who jumped in to tell me that all of science agrees with the Bible and that there’s tons of science in the Bible.
6 hours ago (edited)
There is more science in the Bible then in your head! You follow prooven liars who lost court cases for fruad all throughout history and we are the ones who are wrong? Nah, all the observable science agrees more with the Bible than with your science textbooks! How many debates do you guys have to loose, before you figure it out? We are all presenting the same evidence, but just interpreting it differently through our favored worldview! You have to look past your bias and go deeper into the false assumptions being taught in science in order to see through all the lies! The real issue is you just hate the idea of a God telling you how to live! Good luck with that when you die!
6 hours ago
Cool. What chapter of the bible contains Maxwell’s equations, or Newton’s laws of motion, or a discussion of signal transduction in neurons? Or maybe something basic, like the importance of hygiene in preventing disease.
Hey! is the germ theory of disease in there?
1 hour ago
@PZ Myers The answer is not in said “which chapter,” it is in the actual event of following the instructions given as a whole and seeing the obvious results. We have literally been doing that for thousands of years. You will find that in the Bible, there are explanations for some of those very questions you just mentioned such as hygiene to prevent disease. Do you not understand homeopathic medicine, or how long it’s been successfully curing diseases and ailments? Of course logically you’re not going to see “theory” like newton’s own, or maxwells equations. I mean what kind of a silly question is that? The Bible has been here for thousands of years before those people were born, and it’s still the way of life provably, while everyone else is arguing over theories that were literally disproven many years ago, and on top of that it has been proven these men perpetuating these ideas and “scientific theories” were occult practitioners, and were steering their own beliefs and views onto the public domain, which were met with great resistance. I mean that is all public record sir. What reality are you living in my friend, you seem interested in intelligence so let’s utilize it shall we?
His answer is … HOMEOPATHY! Homeopathy is in the Bible. Therefore, it’s science.
I haven’t seen this degree of lunacy for a while.
What a nut! The Bible asserts that insects have 4 legs, that bats are birds, and that everything that swims in the sea (apparently including whales) are fish. I’ve got an idea: let’s get a fly-swatter for one of the local first-graders and have him or her catch some (4-legged) flies. Sheesh.
“Do you not understand homeopathic medicine,”
Dreamt up by Samuel Hahnemann in 1796,later. Not to known to have successfully cured or anything, excepting it’s placebo nature (and use of potable water, probably safer than the usual water back in 1796…?).
I love the use of “literally”…
Where in the Bible is Boolean Algebra described and fundamental theorems proved?
So the bileble has more science, then immediately after that, your head has more science. Does this require one to read the bileble, or does it happen automagically?
“Prooven” is obviously more better than “proven”, but shouldn’t we be relying on what’s “prooooooooooooooven”? And who / what is “fruad”? So many questions, so little time…
Is it possible to tighten a debate, rather than “loosing” it?
Well, you have to admit, that is a rather reprehensible idea.
Why will I need luck when I’m a lifeless, decaying pile of bones and tissue? What will that luck acutally get me?
Many years ago I was shocked to learn that other adult human beings were actually this dysfunctional. Surely a chemical imbalance, I said, or a congenital defect of the prefrontal cortex, or a blow to the head early in life. I sought therapy, I sought reason. Couldn’t find any.
I’ve since forsaken hope for humanity, and accepting doom has becalmed me enough that morons like these are just a cheap source of sardonic entertainment. Keep it up, chuckleheads.
So glad my wife and I chose not to bring children into this collapsing world.
@5, Euclid’s Elements dates to c.300 BCE, which isn’tdifferent, and so can be ignored. And today’s version is probably from Byzantium, not monks scribbling away. Besides, it definitely predates a certain chunk of the faerie tales, and hence, well, something. And, and, it wasn’t found in those pyramidal grain elevators in Egypt, so there! Loogic tryumphs agin!!!1!
I have Said it before and I say it again; PZ deserves praise for going through these insufferable word salads in search of what the fuck they mean…
I’m guessing that the computer that they typed that drivel on is an occult device, since it’s not in their holly bauble. Wouldn’t that then count as their engaging in witchcraft?
Add in, the old testament really sucked at identifying, let alone treating Hansen’s disease. All science does is simply identify and cure it.
“There is more science in the bible then (sic!) in your head”.
Muslims make similar claims about the koran.
This provides much merriment to skeptics and ex-muslims, who cheerfully expose the absurdities in the koran.
-Like the sun sets in a muddy spring, the heaven is a solid canopy that may fall and crush things, the embryology is completely wrong, the Moon was once split, the shooting stars are weapons the angels hurl after djinn who attempt to sneak up to heaven and overhear the angels.
And the Pharaoh (of Egypt) built the Tower of Babel (in Mesopotamia).
Goliath has chain mail (not invented that early). Miriam (sister of Aaron) is assumed to be the mother of Jesus.
As a skeptic I find that book as fun as Three Men In A Boat.
Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says
Cry, “Freeze Peach!” and let slip the dogs of debate!
Ray Ceeya says
“I haven’t seen this degree of lunacy for a while.”
You haven’t engaged with the anti-5G crowd yet. I had a guy the other day try to tell me that 5G prevents your blood from transporting oxygen.
WMDKitty -- Survivor says
Oh, dear. Oh, that was painful. How does that person remember to breathe?
The Bible predicted WIFI in Revelations 5-G.
Reminds me of King Rehoboam of Judah saying, “My little finger is thicker than my father’s loins!”
Jesus said that ritual handwashing before eating was unnecessary. The Bible doesn’t have a recipe for soap (though the prophets mention soap in passing). The authors of Leviticus thought that WALLS could get leprosy.
Yeah, totally reliable!
Since I’m new to the town in which I now live, I signed up for a site called NextDoor. It’s fairly handy for accessing recommendations for local service providers, getting to know the locals during this pandemic and even for selling a few things.
I’ve found that a number of loons inhabit that space, too. It is amusing and informative to find out what they are thinking, but can get depressing at times. It was also a bit surprising to me to find those loons living here on the coast of California, but they seem to be everywhere.
I remember how shocked I was back in the 80s to realize that creationists actually existed . And those were the old earth creationists . I still can’t wrap my head around YEC beliefs . I mean did they sleep though even middle school science?
PZ Myers says
The Meek has added another instance of science in the Bible.
Are you impressed yet?
Rob Grigjanis says
ORigel @16 & 17: There’s plenty to criticize in the Bible, but grossly misreading/misrepresenting a passage does no favours to your credibility.
First, Rehoboam didn’t say that. His friends said it to him as a metaphor for how much harsher he should be with his subjects than his father had been. 1 Kings 12: 10-11.
Uses of the word ‘leprosy’ in translations of the Old Testament (from the Hebrew tzaraath) don’t necessarily refer to Hansen’s disease. In the case of human skin, or clothing, or the stones of a house, it could mean a disfigurement/discolouration of some sort, as might be caused by disease in humans, mould or fungus in clothes and houses.
slithey tove (twas brillig (stevem)) says
The Meek wrote:
I guess I’m weird to find it funny the misspelling of lose completely flips the meaning of the sentence.
EG: loose lips lose your lunch
For some reason these always stand out for me in bowls of word salad
Rob Grigjanis says
The Meek wrote
He was a Christian, but he also believed that no religious beliefs/doctrines should stand in the way of investigation. Also, he didn’t write that. It’s one of his favourite hymns, by Richard Baxter.
Aside from timeline issues, shouldn’t Christians consider it Satanic? I mean, it uses sympathetic magic.
Crypt Dyke @12: What are the dogs of debate, anyway?
I’m guessing Yorkies.
Ray Ceeya says
“Canst thou send lightnings, that they may go, and say unto thee, Here we are?”
It’s so much simpler in the original old Norse mythology.
“Oh lightening, Thor’s getting laid right now”.
I’m killing the next person I see who writes “loose” for “lose”. Oh, and “tow the line” too.
@27 I sometimes have to think about whether it’s “soft pedal” or “soft peddle” (the latter, incorrect one, sounds like it could be the opposite of “hard sell”). Of course, it’s “pedal” like on a piano. “Tow the line” is another one that sounds like it could mean something. You can tow with a line, and “toe” is uncommon as a verb. In fact, the metaphor is both obscure and overused, so it should probably be avoided completely.
“Loose” is one of those that I see a lot. It really takes me back to Yahoo stock market comments circa 2000 because I saw it so much there with all the talk of gains and losses. I kind of like the sound of “loosers” for “losers” though.
I make a lot of typos from pure carelessness even though I know the correct spelling, so it’s hard to feel like I have the high ground.
@27 Also “then” for “than”. Though I do it sometimes if I don’t proofread.
@21 For the “leprosy” the priests prescribe much the same treatment as with “leprosy” on people (the burning of the object of course excepted). I suspected what you said at one point, so I shouldn’t have put that.
On Rehoboam, on reading 1 Kings 12 and 2 Chronicles 10, I see you are right. Rehoboam didn’t actually say that. The wording of the advice in the first person confused me and made me thought the king said it. My bad.
I am not trying to misrepresent the Bible; I just am not the best interpreter. Especially since the three versions I have read so far were the KJV (archaic, difficult), the NASB (fairly literal, somewhat difficult), and the YLT (so literal so that some parts do not make sense in English).
@PaulBC, as memory serves, toe the line was a naval term, the barefoot crew literally having their toes in line with a single plank line to be scolded at great length.
Similar to bring to heel was an infantry term, as toeing a line would present an irregular line, due to different foot sizes and tidy formations were critical in set piece warfare. So, heels to line was the rule then and now.
Just as the phrase “three sheets to the wind” meant three sails blowing loose in the wind, which would render a tall ship at great hazard, utterly uncontrollable if the wayward sails not brought back under control and likely to turn turtle (capsize).
Shit end of the stick in regards to burning excrement in a burn out latrine, stirring with an obviously dispensable stick. Shit job, derived from shit detail, see the stick part – someone’s on the shit list, so they get to stir the burning shit.
I have precisely zero inclination in researching the origin of shit eating grin, but I’m fairly certain it wasn’t military derived… ;)
“Bring to heel” is surely derived from dog training?!
“You follow prooven liars who lost court cases for fruad all throughout history and we are the ones who are wrong?”
Isn’t that Kent Hovind he’s describing?
Lose (obsolete): In ye olden days, the verb ‘to loose’, which as you know means ‘to mislay’, was spelled with one ‘o’. Legend also speaks of a separate verb, spelled the same as our modern ‘loose’, meaning ‘to release’. However, the Yahoos! Of! Yahoo! and the /ers of /. have long since put paid to this scheme, and there is no point in struggling against the status quo. You might as well cut off your noose to spite your face.
— Verity Stob, The Register, 7 Jun 2006
Next up, a Christian apologist explains how the story of Jonah and the Whale perfectly describes buoyancy. Another will come with how knowing when the sparrow falls is actually a treatise on aerodynamics. Finally, we will have mathematics explained by informing us that the ratio of the circumference of a circle to it’s diameter is 3.0.
Forget the spelling, if only they got the SI units right I would be more forgiving: “Canst thou send lightnings  38:35 KJV”. Good grief, Volts are already Joules per Coulomb. And please use decimal point:- 38.35 kV. And the answer is then clearly ‘no’, as the initial cloud-earth breakdown voltage is more than a megaVolt.
Not very meek, calling yourself ‘the meek’ when you’re a Christian…
chigau (違う) says
In nautical terms “sheets” are the ropes used to control the sails.
@38 The meek will inherit what’s left of the earth after the “Christians” are done picking over the carcass.
@29, More precisely (at least according to Ye Pffft! of All Knowledge):
@41 meant @39 not @29, Sorry@(er, !)
Howard Brazee says
Besides the lunacy of that post, I’m curious. Is it a new thing to confuse “then” and “than”? Do people pronounce them alike, or is it just a spelling thing. I keep noticing it.
(I also see as many typos in Karaoke as I songs, so it may be just that we don’t care about spelling anymore)
Mrdead Inmypocket says
@43 Howard Brazee
In my experience, which doesn’t count for much, people with southern accents will make that spelling error more often. May have something to do with a combination of pronunciation, inflection and trying to spell phonetically. I have zero to back that up though. It’s just, if you’ve heard some accents, you kind of get the idea they’re pronouncing the word as “then” and not “than”.
Looks like fundamentalists don’t have an issue with science per se, as long as it comes from a source they trust. Maybe if we wrap science in something they can buy into. I’m not saying I want to be a Technomage. But you know, if that’s gonna help I’m just putting that out there.
Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden says
Someone has never tried to read a book in the dark. Or heard of lighthouses. Or warning lanterns.
DLC@36: “Finally, we will have mathematics explained by informing us that the ratio of the circumference of a circle to it’s diameter is 3.0.”
That ratio is 3.0 if you live close enough to a black hole (or maybe close enough to god?). So, the bible does anticipate general relativity and curved spaces – Meek wins again.
“Towing a line” is pulling a rope – in the UK the line is usually one attached to a boat or a barge on a river. Toeing the line – always reminds me of John Belushi collecting his “one prophylactic, used” from Frank Oz in the Blues Brothers :D
@43. German “dann” (then) and “denn” (than) frequently confuse English speakers.
@19 I have only been on line since 2008 ,so like you i was shocked to discover how many RWRNJ’s are out there .
I do remember seeing a programme on the BBC about either the Discovery Institute or Liberty university ,and there was someone going on about Intelligent design .